Some politicians (especially ones with brobdingnagian heads) have been comparing the war in Iraq to the war in Vietnam, and, since politicians are smart, this must be taken seriously. Here are some of the similarities I have identified:
* Both Vietnam and Iraq have an ‘i’ in them.
* Both are foreign countries.
* Both wars were opposed by stupid, smelly hippies.
* Both wars were supported and then opposed by John Kerry.
Those are some striking similarities. So, if the war is like Vietnam, what did we learn from Vietnam? Well, what we learned from Vietnam is that, if you lose a war like Vietnam, forever after people will question future wars by saying they are like Vietnam. Think about how things would be different if we decisively won Vietnam; then, someone not liking a war would say, “We’re going to get bogged down in this war like… well… no other war in American history.” And no one would listen to that person.
Moral: Win your g’damn wars.
FIRST!
You g’damn pants pooper!
Hee hee hee!
Another similarity:
The people of Vietnam and the people of Iraq who were actually happy that the US was/is there to fight tyranny never get interviewed by liberal reporters.
i feel smarter having read this post, especially after i looked up that colossal vocabulary word that you threw out. now i don’t have to learn anything else today; soap operas it is.
rocky,
I was thinking of putting that in there, but I decided to leave it to just the silly similarities because people trying to compare the two are silly.
Make love…. not war!!
Forgive my unsillyness. I was also going to say that both countries were farg’d up by the French blah blah blah…
One is really, really wet and the other is really, really dry. Oh crap, nevermind.
Both Iraq and Vietnam have no coastline on the west…which made that scene at the end of The Green Berets with John Wayne and that little Vietnamese kid kinda fishy, what with them watching the sunset on the beach and all…but I bet John Wayne coulda figured out a way to make that happen…
..where’d everybody go?
And in both wars, our wins have been portrayed as losses by the media. Even catching Hussein.
Great post. I would love to an IMW where kennedy tries to deny his complete drunkeness. I have rosatia!!!! Really!!!
UH…Allergies!! That’s it..allergies!!
that was all i could think about when i saw his little speach about “bush’s vietnam”.
How could anyone listen to that puke? ..much less vote for him.
I truly hope there’s a big difference… That we stay the course and kick ass, all the way to Damascus, Riyadh and Teheran. Pyongyang and Hanoi while we’re at it, weather permitting.
In one aspect I hope that Iraq turns out to be like Vietnam.
Two words: Carpet Bombing
X:
I don’t think you’re capable of doing either!
Boots, you are wrong… did both this morning.
Iraq is like Vietnam
As a public service to his readers, Frank J tells us how they are similar: Some politicians (especially ones with…
You have to do the dance, Sandor! Otherwise it’s just not cool.
From the Fingers of Comedians
Absolute brilliance. From Frank J * Both Vietnam and Iraq have an ‘i’ in them. * Both are foreign countries. * Both wars were opposed by stupid, smelly hippies. * Both wars were supported and then opposed by John Kerry….
It’s not “Bush’s Vietnam”, but it might just be “Bush’s Northern Ireland”. So at all costs we must avoid getting scared that the rest of the world is judgemental – we’ve already bombed the f*** out of Iraq – the “softly-softly” approach is hardly going to make them like us…
thanks for clearing that up, frank.
I don’t think Baal will smite him unless you cut your arms more. Here! Use my potato peeler!
“what did we learn from Vietnam?”
and the answer is…
Democrates lose wars.
Democrates? Was that the really whiny Greek philosopher?
I might have to use that name for an IMW…
Will Democrates have the Celtic name Brobdingnagia, and hail from Gaul?
Just askin’.
Special Ed
I bought a copy of Battlefield:Vietnam today so I could find out if it’s really like Iraq. First thing I’m gonna do is jump on a Navy gun boat and shoot up a civilian village! Then, I’ll run for President of the Sims Online since I’ll be a real war hero!
Special Ed, democrats in Gaul are not leftists. They are the minority of the right that did not join with the politic of Chirac when he created the MPF in 2002 after his reelection with 82% of the votes. Democrats in France are the most pro-Americans, but they only score… well less than 10%.
Actually… I know how to spell the word, I just find it sinful to actually use it so I modify it slightly so that I dont feel bad and have to destroy my computer.
No ones ever noticed before… I’ll start using dummycrats as my filler word instead around here since you guys are so damn picky.
perhaps Baal is asleep? or taking a dump?
Iraq = Vietnam?
Ignorant journalists and anti-Bush politicians (or is it the other way around?) are much in the news dourly comparing Iraq to Vietnam. A Google News search (Vietnam + Iraq) yields “about 7,450” hits — for example, a USA Today story…
I thot Democrates was the really waffly liberal Greek philosopher…
i feel that these wars are similar except that most of the youth today doesn’t give a rats behind!
It’s people like you– too blind to see beyond their “my country, right or wrong” patriotism– that are destroying the lives and homes of people all over the world. It’s easy to cynical in front of your keyboard, in the comfort of your heated, running-water, electrical home where you face no more than generally-applicable angst and the leftist rants of those you’ve so admirably deemed “smelly hippies” (well done, by the way. The maturity of the comment was outstanding). I don’t imagine the Iraqis find it quite so simple, but then, they’re just poor pathetic Muslims, who so clearly want the US to come in, bomb their cities, kill their brethen, and loot their homes, creating general havoc and upheaval. I love your indefatigable logic. Go to hell, asshole.
By the way, I’m a retard. (Notice the lack of email.)
George W. Bush as John Wayne, both managed to weasle out of being involved in any combat in Vietnam war-while both later, managed to fool public into appearing as Heroes-with NO HEROIC record of any type.
Both are quite good actors-and both are Republicans-course, John Wayne is on the other side now-heaven or hell?
Both John Wayne and George W. Bush were heavy drinkers and partiers, up until 40s-when they were middle aged, so then claimed they had “Repented” !
If you buy that-will-guess you are another one on the list of “easily fooled”, which both men saw public were easily deceived by lies.
Gypsy
VANITY FAIR magazine sais that the problem with GW Bush is not that he never served in Vietnam but that he totally refuses to learn the painful lessons learned there…Ahhhh, there’s the rub, “painful,” for it can’t be painful if you’ve never been there. So, when ex-combat marine vet Pat Robertson warned him that a lot of men will die if he invades Iraq, Bush brushed him off, assuring him that it would not be. But it was, and too many died and are STILL dying.
In Vietnam we bombed the hell out of the countryside to save American lives. This made for millions of refugees to the cities. As a result, South Vietnam went from 85% rural to 75% urban in two years and the peasant “sea” in which swam the VC “fish” dried up. Somehow, we created jobs for the refugees and a bustling economy. So desperate was Hanoi, claiming that the people had become “petit bourgeois” that it ordered a desperate attack by the VC at Tet 1968. After that there was no more VC, only Hanoi’s PAVN regulars!
But in Iraq, modern and urban before we got there, Bush and Rummy tried to do it on the cheap. To date most Iraqi’s have no way of supporting their familes. So, they get mad and join al-Zarkawi cutting heads off all the foreign workers we bring in instead of employing the locals.
Whether drunk or sober, GW never suffered the pain of the rest of us not born with a silver foot in our mouths. So he takes it all oh sooooooooooooo light.
Moral is, we gotta learn how to pick candidates better so that we don’t ever again leave the voters to chose between the ventral bottom of a horse and the dorsal back-end.