So here I am, minding my own business, and I get this e-mail:
Umm… I’m just wondering.. when does the funny start?
Or… am I missing a joke somewhere?
Brian.
P.S. You got beat up a lot as a kid didn’t you?
I’ve grown a lot in popularity since I started blogging, but the hate mail has failed to match it. That’s actually the best I’ve gotten in months. Did what I could to work with it and responded thusly:
LOL! What prompted this one? We’re you molested as a kid?
IMAO stands by its near three year history of humor excellence. If anything at IMAO does not meet your standards, you can send it back for a full refund (except for t-shirts).
Good day and better luck on finding the joke.
-Frank J.
http://imao.us
Beaten up as a kid? You’re talking to Frank J., here. Like I’d put up with such rubbish at any age. As my father always told me when I was young:
“If another kid hits you, hit him back. Or, if someone looks at you funny, hit him. Plus, if you’re bored, might as well hit somebody. Also, if some kid bothers you while you’re in the middle of watching a football game, hit him just like I’m about to hit you.”
UPDATE: He’s already responded. No reference to lyrics from Rage Against the Machine, but I’ll do my best to work my magic on it.
Where’s the Limey when you need him? This guy’s hate mail was sorta weak.
I miss the Limey.
I’d read his letters outloud to my family. Ahh, good times…
One of the things (the only thing?) I remember from USAF survival school is that in a survival situation your morale is very important. So if it improves your morale to kill something for fun, by all means go ahead and do it.
I’m also certain that life is a survival situation. I have since learned that it would have been very helpful if they had included a section about how to hide the bodies.
But at least my morale is high.
Brian, you blew it!
Everyone knows that this ‘cover page’ is only to throw off those than don’t compliment FrankJ’s In My World sufficiently. Just three fawning emails or comments, and you could have got the secret link that FrankJ sends out to us loyal readers, that takes you to where ‘the funny starts.’ Oh, and it is funny.
Now you’ll never know, and we’ll be laughing and shooting guns (two of three things that make life worth living) while you continue to suck.
If it makes you feel any better, the only hatemail I’ve been able to generate on my blog was aimed at you. I linked to your Fun Facts About Iran and upset a couple of people.
Isn’t there a saying about a man being judged by the quality of his enemies or something lame’o like that… If that’s true Frank you are in deep sh!t!!!
WEAK! Where is the limey when you need him? Oh well…….
I agree, we need the Limey back.
Ahhh…the memories of his rantings and Rage against the Machine lyrics, moonbattery at its best. (sigh)
Limey
Limey
Limey
where are you hiding yourself Limey?
bring back your wicked bad hate mail,
and bring us joy.
I read dozens of blogs every day ranging from national talk show hosts to next door neighbors and I have to say…….THAT was the lamest attempt at hate mail I’ve ever seen!
FrankJ. if that’s the best you’ve gotten in months, then you need to get to work. You obviously aren’t irritating enough people. You must resolve this!
Oh, and Brian, from someone who shares your name, I’m truly embarrassed. You didn’t miss the joke, you just forgot to check the mirror.
(Yeh, it was weak, I was trying to drop to his level.)
Any idiot can find “funny” in almost anything. Humor, though, takes a discerning mind and an IQ above the level of the normal asshat. I love the humor found at IMAO.
But, as the kangaroo said as he jumped out of the closet, “It’s my helmet and I’ll polish it any way I want.”
Frank,
I heard that you are sad that you are not getting hate mail. The liberal side has you don’t matter.
Not because of your ideas, but politics cares not about ideas, we only care about votes. We don’t care
one way or another about homosexuals, the poor, or people of color, taxes or the war.
Your minor sardonic wit has no effect on votes, so we do not care about you.
Oh yea, Bill said to say hi, he likes cats too (we always thought you were a closet Democrat).
Regards,
USSenatorBitchy
And I quoth from http://www.letssingit.com, In My Eyes from Rage Against the Machine..
“You tell me that I make no difference
Well at least I’m f***ing trying
What the f*** have you done?”
Whaa whaa I can’t find a joke.
Yeah, I too miss das limey. It’s always more interesting and fun when they thrash like he did.
FrankJ,
Maybe you should have a contest for the most hateful hatemail. Communists, socialists, and hippies love contests, as long as the competition is race/gender nonbiased and the mail is graded on a bell curve where the playing field is level for people from all walks of life. The prize could be a free bar of soap and a shiney new communist manefesto(must be made by a union worker).
This isn’t near as good as the Limey, but it’s still hate mail. Hate mail is far and away my favorite on IMAO. Hopefully Brian’s response is a lot more hateful.
Well, isn’t this ironic? Because the very article that first attracted me to IMAO was Frank’s Hate Mail to Michael Moore.
Still, to this day, I think its the funniest piece Frank has ever done. I printed it out and read it to just about everyone I knew at the time who would listen (which was about three people … I live in NJ after all).
Ahh, I also managed to get onto the Limey’s private email list when I chastised him for not sending in any hate … those were the days.
I guess all of these Republican electoral victories have taken the fight out of ’em. Maybe we could just throw a few elections to get them back in the game.
“Well, isn’t this ironic? Because the very article that first attracted me to IMAO was Frank’s Hate Mail to Michael Moore.”
Me too! I still go back and read it again every now and then. Just the very mention of it makes me laugh and wanna read it again. lol
OMG – Hating Michael Moore is one of the funniest things I’ve read by FrankJ, or any one for that matter.
For those of you who have never read it, know this: If you like anything on IMAO, you’ll love this!
Oh, if only it would fit on a t-shirt!!! sigh
I agree about the Michael Moore letter! I hope your response to Brian mentions leprechans somewhere!
The letter to MM was my first read on IMAO too, gotta be the funniest thing I’ve ever read in my life.
Leprechans…LOL. I even used that line in an e-mail to my nosy ex right after.
Sorry to rip it from ya like that Frank, but that was really priceless. 🙂