I am against the Flag Burning Amendment. I, having not actually read the text of it, presume it will merely make state laws which criminalize flag burning, stand against Supreme Court shenanigans.
I want it to be known I am against flag burning, of course. I just think that there may possibly be ways that the Constitution could be amended specifically to allow flag burning as an expansion of the first amendment expression of free speech, provisionally. Flagburners should never have to fear the government during or after the burning of an American flag, provisionally. I’ve said “provisionally” twice now so hopefully you know there are provisions and I am not completely off the deep end.
If some other changes are made as well to the amendment I could accept it. If it were amended to, say, expand the first amendment a little in other ways and while we are at it tweak some other popular amendments as well.
The Right to Freedom of the Press. – First Amendment
Americans should be protected if they want to put flagburners in a large metal press, the kind that Sarah Connor terminated the first terminator with in the movie Terminator. They should also be allowed to operate the metal press in as slow a manner as they wish as free expression of this.
The Right To Bear Arms. – Second Amendment
I’m not talking about shooting flagburners, that’s waaaaay too quick for them. Bear arms, attached to a living, preferably hungry, bear, should be employed to hug flagburners in the gentle embrace that only a wild bear can give. Any ripping, shredding or disemboweling the bear arms do should be covered and protected under the amendment.
The Right to Peacefully Assemble – First Amendment Again
This right should be expanded to include piece-by-piece disassembly of flagburners. Say, like, with an array of farm implements, some dull, some sharp. We could mix it up so it doesn’t get boring. Boredom can be pure torture, ask any Gitmo detainee.
The Right To Not Face Double Jeopardy. – Seventh Amendment
If an American is unsuccessful at expressing any one of these rights to their personal satisfaction, they should be able to express any of the other newly expanded rights listed here until the flagburner faces, what we can call Eternal Jeopardy.
The Right to Freedom of Expression – First Amendment One Final Time
An American should be allowed to exercise his/her freedom of expression by burning an American flag BURNER during or after the actual flagburning. I would recommend during, since that practically begs for the use of gasoline-filled balloons.

Then flagburners will never again have to fear a viscious facsist American government when they exercise their new constitutional right.
They will just have to fear people like me and maybe, you.
Let’s do our best to make flagburning legal, unsafe and flagburners somewhere between rare and medium well.

As the Peyote Light wears off RWD Struggles to Control the Spirit of Dean which he now channels..
Let’s join in on today’s session..
QUESTION:Posted by Jonathan
Dr. Dean,
How come you’re an idiot? and do you have a favorite pop-tart?
Mine’s Hot Fudge Sundae.
“Ha. If I’m the (YEARGh) idiot, how come YOU’RE the one who put a hot fuge sundae in the toaster!! (Yea.. argh. h)”
QUESTION: Posted by Army NCO Guy
RWDean, I’m a white Christian Republican. Do you really hate me? I wanna be your friend.
I try to hate everyone equally. Check with my staff to see if we have any openings. Maybe we can go biking. I know a nice church with a bikepath
QUESTION: Posted by Thor Jr.
What is the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything?
“The answer is 42 — billion dollars earmarked to find the answer to that! And Republicans are doing nothing about it!! Stupid, white Christians. (Ack. Ack)”
QUESTION: Posted by JoshG
Dr. Dean
–.On the Jon Stewrt [sic] Show last night you were unfunny and said nothing of value. Do you think a moist clump of sod would have been a better guest? On a related note, did you order a pizza?
“Well, just HOW moist of a clump are we talking about? A semi-moist clump — I can take on no problem. Clods can be sexy, you kno? [very sic]
“Hmmm. Pizza. I didn’t think to order one. But that’s okay — the clod did.”
QUESTION: Posted by xtremerightwing
RWDean,
How can we get the kitchen staff to vote Republican? Or rather, what steps are you taking to make sure the kitchen staff votes Republican?
“(Yea-arrgh). I’d be happy if the kitchen staff would serve my dinner while it’s still warm. Or as they say, “Caliente”. The reality is that kitchen help vote Democrat. Unless they speak English — then it’s anybody’s game.”
QUESTION: Posted by Kalthalior
How is your outreach plan to Confederate-flag wearing voters coming? Making any progress?
(RWD is having a hard time channeling the Dean spirit. He picks up a pie and smashes it into his face. YEAAAAAAAAAAARGH)
“Senator Robert C. Byrd and I have talked about this at length. Confederate flag fans admire strength and determination. We are reaching out to them. So if you have a gun rack and fly the Confederate flag, make sure you visit our next event — The Rainbow Coalition Makeover Madness Party. It will be Fab-U-lous!”
QUESTION: Posted by spacemonkey
Dr. Dean, being the Bible know-er that you are, what is your favorite Old Testament book.
“Aargh. Uh. Arrrgh. Table of Contents. It’s magical in its ability to tell you where things are. BTW, shouldn’t you be working on your scripts for the Podcast?”
QUESTION: Posted by Just Plain Frank
Does Vermont have penis envy?
“yeargh. Only the Male half.”
Question: Posted by james wigderson
Dr. Dean, who can scream louder, you or Roger Daltry? I mean, you’ve got the energy, the passion, the itinerary, but Roger’s got amplifiers and cool background music like, Won’t Get Fooled Again.
Is it true you can scream louder than the engine on a Boeing 747?
“I don’t know about Daltry. But let me address this to all of my friends, plus all the other blue collar Americans who struggle under Republican rule. Remember folks, when you buy a jet airplane, buy American!!”
Question: Posted by Lily
Dr. Dean,
I understand you take issue with questions about your patriotism. To lay those charges to rest once and for all, can you name and do you know the words to our national anthem?
ARRRgh. Spit. Shudder.
“You think I don’t know the words to honor the land that I love? Shut up and listen! Ahem. Ahem. Ohhhhh. Can-a-da!!!…”
**
RWD slumps over. The spirit of Dean is gone.
Remember kids. Drink Diet Coke.

Ladies and Gentlemen,
I ran out of Diet Coke this morning. The store only had Diet Pepsi, and being that Pepsi is the middle finger of the soda world I had to look for another drink there at local Mexican Mercado (That means market for you Other Than Mexicans).
Anyway, the only other drink they had was Peyote Light. Now with Splenda. Unbeknownst to me – Peyote has special mystical powers. And a fresh fruity aftertaste.
That’s right. RWD is now channeling the spirit of Howard Dean!!!
THIS IS YOUR CHANCE!!
Ask me anything you would want to ask Howard Dean!! I’ll post answers to the best questions later today.
Quick before this wears off!! Do you want to know what Howard Dean is thinking!!? I have the answers!!
(Takes a sip)
Hmmm. Peyote Light check your local grocer for availability.
P.S. I had some leftover exclamation points. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and a 4)

Liberals are trying to manufacture outrage over Karl Rove’s statements of:

Conservatives saw the savagery of 9/11 in the attacks and prepared for war; liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers.

I’m afraid I’m stating the obvious, but, the reason the liberals shaking their tiny fists in impotent rage won’t results in an apology are two-fold:
1. What Rove said is true without hyperbole.
2. Everybody hates liberals and does not listen to their opinions.
Nice try, but no banana, muckadoos.
BTW, Michelle Malkin has a good roundup of reactions (as always), and, personally, I like the Puppy Blender’s take.