Ok, we’re just watching straight through, I’ll have to blog it in the morning, because I dragged my husband out shopping for three hours tonight, so I’m being a good girl and doing a quick watch-through… blah blah blah…
All I have to say right now, though…
Wow, THE GLOCK. She was outstanding, I was so proud of her (ok, honestly I hated the dress, the boots were a’ight, but I LOVED the performance).
Idols 03. Vote it!
Oh my. As I was typing this, Sanjaya walked out with his faux-hawk, as Paula just called it. I hate to say this: it was his best performance even though he forgot the words and had that hair thing going on.
Wow, Haley isn’t wearing sleeveless and didn’t show her armpits. I almost am tempted to vote for her. Would never do, no, but I’m so thankful about the armpits.
Ok, I’m signing off unless someone else knocks me off my feet.
Vote for THE GLOCK!
UPDATE: Idols 10… Chris Richardson was totally knocking my socks off until he forgot a couple of words near the end. Mouth agape and everything, chest clutcher until then. Chris, please remember, though: the microphone stays at your mouth. If your body bobs up and down, the arm with the mic moves in motion with your head. If you’re using a mic stand, you must bob only the body, keep the mouth stationary, or no bobbing. You have quite enough vibrato without leaving out entire notes due to mic loss.
Quick lineup:
03 The Glock. Mwah. I was so happy when I heard your song choice. Perfect song for you, very well sung, heartfelt and emotional. You win tonight. But no more painted on bronze dresses, please. I heart you, but I could have plucked you off the stage and used you to decorate one of my plant ledges with the metallics you were painted into tonight. I hate to even go negative at all on you because I loved your performance so much, and it was your best so far, but I can’t not talk about that dress. Say, next week how about “Hello” or “My Immortal” by Evanescence? But I’m not sure you can hit those high notes, so either stay away from those songs, or lower them a couple of clicks.
10 Chris Richardson. See above.
07 Melinda. Don’t listen to Simon. The outfit was fine. I love that you dress modestly and don’t feel the need to let it all hang out, unlike Baby-Feeder LaKisha.
01 Lakisha. Enough with the baby feeders. We get it. They’re gigantic. Do you want us to give them their own zip code or something? Rah rah, you have big boobies. Yay for you. I do applaud that most of the rest of you was covered, and other than that, I liked the outfit. And this was your best performance in weeks. I’m starting to like you again. If you would just do something about your boobs.
WH Phil. Thanks for pinning your ears down. Made you more watchable. Oh, come on, I’m not the only one thinking it, just the only one saying it. Y’all would be thanking me for wearing support hose and girdles if I were up there. Except for a few screechy notes, you were quite good until the end, and then you got all freaky weird when you did your own thang, dawg. That’s when it became a gigantic mess, and my face scrunched up in horror. Until then, I had you above LaKisha. I was going to give your number out and everything.
02 Chris Sligh. Sleeping pill. Please throw in at least one vocal backflip in the next performance. I’m giving up on you. I’m glad you got your humor back in the pre-talk, thank you, but what’s with the boring vocals? You can’t phone it in every week, or you won’t last much longer.
09 Jordin – Nice picnic basket you were wearing, Raggedy Ann. Also vocally the worst performance out of her in weeks. If Disney’s what you do best, just do Disney. How about “Part of Your World”? You haven’t done that one yet. I’m kidding, don’t do it. People will laugh at you, and that’s one of my all-time favorite Disney songs. You can never live up to the original, or to my singing-in-the-car version. I rock at that song, baby.
04 Sanjaya. Whatever. Stick around. You’re growing on us, and you know we’re making fun of you. Now you’re just there for the laughs, and you know it, and you know we know it, and you know we know you know it. And even Seacrest and the judges are openly joking about it on-air, so as long as no one is pretending that you’re there because you’re the next Aretha or Whitney or Celine, whatever. I don’t care anymore.
08 Blake – What were the judges on about with that boring performance? Even Sanjaya was more enjoyable. Could y’all hear me yawning on the left coast?
05 Haley. I have nothing to say.
Gwen Stefani. Wow, she’s beautiful. And very nice. She came across as a class act.