Goofy Beards

In Britain, a Muslim police officer is suing because people laugh at his beard. But look at it!

It’s like something just took a photo and painted a beard on with MSPaint! Can you really expect someone who can see that in the mirror and not know something is horribly wrong to uphold the law? Frankly, it would be discourteous not to laugh at him and thus pretend a beard like that is normal. It is not the beard of a sane man; I think I saw that beard in a DSM IV. It’s disturbed beard syndrome. That looks like the same beard you’d buy a kid for a dollar in a costume shop. I we sure it isn’t? That’s the sort of beard that get you laughed out of Amish country. It’s like a black Pacman is biting his chin.

I’m just saying it’s a goofy-looking beard. Am I right?

38 Comments

  1. This is either a set up for a viral practical joke of global proportion or a cosmic pass/fail test. The outcome of this case will either determine whether or not intelligent life can be allowed to continue on this planet or become the first reality show to run up RL casualties in the millions. Please stop the ride, I want to get off.

  2. Wow, now I don’t feel so upset about Jug Ears the Monkey dissing Gordon Brown. I mean, how can you respect the Prime Minister of a country that allows that kind of ridiculous Beardosity to go unmocked, and even allows the owner of said Face Ferret to sue because his little insane, car-bombing, honor-killing, faulting-women-for-being-victims-of-raping, resisting-common-sense-since-the-7th-century sensibilities got all hurty wurty and gave him the cry-alones.

    Man, I am starting to hate muslims less for the fact that they are murdering hypocrite assholes, and more because they spend the time they aren’t blowing themselves and others up bawling about shit that would have gotten you a wedgie for complaining about in grade school, yet trampling and disrespecting anything that isn’t their bullshit fantasy tale written by a marauding crminal pedophile.

    That damned Beard MUST be mocked. For Democracy! For The Republic! For the fact that it’s ri-god-damned-diculous!

  3. BUT I live in central Indiana where we have Amish and the German Babtist church. Both groups wear beard that look every bit as silly.

    But I’ll bet they don’t sue because people laugh at their silly beards. I support his right to have a silly beard (unless the police department has a rule against it). I don’t support his right to sue because people laugh at it.

  4. So some dude pulls me over and he’s got a totally gay beard and a couple of gay thingy’s on his shoulders and says he’s a cop…and I’m like…sure dude…and no I’m not putting my hands on my car and bending over!

  5. So MidwestConservative’s furnace goes out, see. He tries to call MisterFurnace but the phone lines are down. So he goes out to the car, and it won’t start. He heads over to his Amish neighbor’s house to deal with his crises. Amishman comes to the door, invites him in, hears him out, then says, “I’m perfectly willing to help you, friend. You just have to explain what the problem is.”

    I’m from western Ohio, and the Amish don’t look silly to me. Not at all.
    Not. At. Fucking. All.
    Get it?

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