It will be important to study this because the one area conservatives should focus on the most is awesomeness. America needs a leader that will embrace America’s overwhelming awesomeness, a president who understands that space lasers and dinosaurs with rocket launchers are just the next logical step for our country. That’s how we need to differentiate ourselves from the namby pamby liberals.
(hat tip Jonah Goldberg)
If we can’t find any dinosaurs, can we just strap some rocket launchers on Michelle Obama’s back instead?
Chuck Norris is an 11 and a Mullet is a 95? Am I missing something on the periodic table?
It is hard to take this table seriously when Ronald Reagan is omitted. I suspect it may be some sort of elaborate joke.
So according to that table there are certain elements that when combined create entire new levels of awesome and some that should not be combined because the awesome would cause a violent reaction. Thank God someone codified all of this. I fear that most of us just assume that anything awesome can be combined willy-nilly with anything else that is awesome. Now we know and knowing is half the battle.
Have these people never heard of Clint Eastwood?
Or “Washington Crossing the Delaware”, or John Wayne, or Terry Tate, office linebacker, or George Patton, for crying out loud.
And why not Top Fuel dragsters, or Dale Earnhardt, or F-22 Raptors, or the entire U.S. military?
I’ll stop before I hurt myself.
Just like the periodic table of elements I am sure that the periodic table of awesome is incomplete and new elements are being discovered all the time. This is the very thing we should be spending stimulus money on!
On another note. If Frank Js dream of dinosaurs with rocket launchers will not come to pass would this be an acceptable substitute?
http://www.dapperstache.com/index.php?contenttype=picotheday&title=potd_5-24-08
Chuck Norris is so Awesome that he does not have a symbol, he just is.
Samuel L Jackson is the MF while Mr T is just a BadA
All you have to do to Time Travel is just ReWind,
and of course
Christopher Walken is teh Win.
Now digressing into some empirical facts.
Commonly know as Water H2O can be referred to as 1(2)8 or when checking to see its level of awesome Bacon and Cheese. This can not be coincidence.
Jumping to alcohol we have C2H6O or 6(2)1(6)8 or also defined as having some Beer with your Bacon and Cheese. There is something to this.
Of course salt is also shown some love as NaCl [11()17] equates to Chuck Norris and Zombies. Now that is something that would be awesome to see.
Intrigued?
That’s pretty clever. I like how Chocolate (#7) and Chuck Norris (#11) are their own elements.
He misspelled “Jet FIGHTER” (#22) though.
It’s definitely a table for guys though: all the dittos for changing the symbol for Boobs (#13) to Dd. Sheesh, MEN! 😉
I 2nd #3DamnCat that Ronaldus Maximus should be near the top; so should Senator Awesome and Governor Awesome.
And where is the MexiCannon? That should rate a 200 along with the Wall of Fire along our southern border which should get a 150!
Uh Oh! I don’t see Mr. Fred Thompson! Someone is about to get their head ripped off and stuffed up their ass!
Marko,
There were some empty slots. Perhaps they are to be filled when the Awesomtific community discovers new Awesoments like Eastwood, Reagan, John Wayne, etc. True Awesomtific Endeavor is open to updates as new levels of Awesomeness are brought to light.
Damn, I should have read Derek’s comment before posting.
I’m with NunyaB…definitely a guys table. And a young guys table at that. My kids would agree with the majority of it. Still funny, though.
I think an IMAO aweomeness table is in order: more politcal leanings & something for the girls.
The thing you have to remember when trying to determine break something down into its elemental awesomeness it you have to make sure there is no other element contributing to its awesomeness. That is where the discipline of elemental awesomology comes in. Now I would argue just like most of you that Ronald Reagan and John Wayne cannot be broken down any further and no other element on the table contributes to their awesomeness. After looking at the website that contains the table someone asked why the Terminator was not included on the table. Well the Terminator is a combination of awesoments, those being Robots and Miniguns or lasers. Expressed as RMg or RL(2). We should really consider this science in its infancy and I for one may be dedicating my life to its study. Maybe start some sort of periodical Awesomtific America (if this idea is not yet taken then I go on record as being the first since IMAO is the blog of record) I think I could wrangle some stimulus money if I develop a theory i.e. lie linking all things awesome to global warming.
Derek,
I would then have to go on record saying that that is just awesome.
Derek,
I’d have to buythat in addition to the Awesom periodical I already subscribe to. Popular Awesomanics.
Grr. Need to proofread.
Pingback: Periodic Table of Awesomeness | Autumn People
Now wait, This table puts boobs above bacon and Chuck Norris. Which, while we all know that boobs are awesome, bacon is just better.
Popular Awesomanics. That is awesome. I like it.
Obi-Wan Kenobi on the results of the November elections: I felt a great disturbance in the Awesome, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened.
(And that ain’t all he said) Luke: I don’t understand how we got by those Democrats. I thought we were dead.
Obi-Wan: The Awesome can have a strong influence on the weak-minded.
Samuel L. Jackson: Mf
Mr. T: Ba
Love it!
William Shatner is on there. Got my approval.
So GSCMG2F is the chemical composition of a Giant Scorpion with flame thrower tail and mini gun claws. Nice!
what you have to remember about the table this is it is not a list or ranking of awesomeness that #1 (bacon) is the base of all awesomeness just as hydrogrogen is the base of all matter