Here’s a crazy idea: If you like NPR and Planned Parenthood, WRITE THEM A CHECK WITH YOUR OWN MONEY!
With us so much in debt, why are there even debates on this crap? It’s like I live in crazy world.
Old left stance: Govt should stay out of the bedroom. New left stance: Govt should stay out of bedroom… unless it brings money.
We really need a “Flush the Losers” provision where we can dump our entire legislative branch in times of emergency and start over.
How about instead of a shutdown we just try a reboot.
$39 billion? That’s 1/366th of the way to ending the debt! …Not counting what we’re adding to it this year.
Obama: “We got a comprise between two groups: Those who hate the country and want it to drown in debt and those scared of the Tea Party.”
Yay. We didn’t cancel a field trip. That’s worth a trillion at least.
Our president is so useless. We should get one of those seat fillers from the Oscars to replace him.
Maybe when they vote to defund Planned Parenthood, someone will find 7000 extra votes somewhere.
Pirate-man’s origin is that he was bitten by a radioactive pirate.
I like it when liberals respond to us not wanting to fund abortion with things they don’t want to fund. Yay! More cuts!
If you’re resistant to waterboarding, a good line would be, “Is the board in waterboard spelled B-O-R-E-D because *yawn*.”
But there are two kinds of reboots, Frank: warm and cold. The warm boot just restarts the governmnet while the cold boot involves my Carolines up their a$$.
Random thought: On a scale of one to fifteen, I give Nuke the Moon t-shirts a seventeen and Harvey a sixteen.
Why is it called Planned Parenthood. You aren’t going to be a Parent, after you murder your child? Shouldn’t it be Planned Parentmurderhood?
JimmyC –
it should be named Freedom from Parenthood. So many of these folks who dont want to take responsibility for thier actions use this to free them selves of the burden of said responsibilities.
Catch Phrases for Congress
– Congress: Still shovelling sh*t against the tide
– Budget agreement: Just another fart in a windstorm
– Congress: Fixing what ails America, one teaspoon at a time
– Congress: Much worse than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick
– Congress: No reach-arounds
– Congress: Playing Jacob with our birthright since the Great Society
– Congress: Peeing down our backs without so much as a casual denial
– US Voters: P*ssing in the wind for over half a century now
“WITH YOUR OWN MONEY!”
“HERESY!”
–Obama
And so what if the libs find 7000 extra votes when we defund Abortions ‘R Us? It’ll take a lot more than 7000 extra to make them look like they’re in the majority, or even anywhere near mainstream American thought.
We should require congress people to wear a big electronic necklace which is locked on when they are sworn in. And then We The People get a button. When congress does something stupid we all get to push our buttons and when a certain % of the buttons are pushed (say 10%) the Congressman/woman starts to get shocked. As the % rises the shock rises until it hits a potential 100% when zap, the Congressman’s brain is totally re-booted and he is a blithering idiot…in other words he is twice as smart as when we started! I would have my button taped down with Gorilla Glue Tape!
I advise rocket powered ejector seats in congress. Knda like ussjimmycarter’s idea, but with more woosh.
For a trillion dollars we saved a field trip AND Obama’s vacation. Can’t leave out that vacation.
Do we have to wait for them to do something stupid? or can we just push the button? 🙂
We could hire IBM to create a “Constitutional Watson” for us plus require all legislators to wear neck Constitutional Truth Collars. Here’s how it would work. When a bill is voted on, it’s text – and the names of those who voted for it – are passed to Constitutional Watson for analysis. If the bill is found unconstitutional, Constitutional Watson would issue shock commands to those voting yes. The severity of the shock depends on the degree of violation. The two levels are: (1) Dead; and (2) Wish You Were Dead and Hadn’t Voted Yes.
“Obama: “We got a comprise between two groups: Those who hate the country and want it to drown in debt and those scared of the Tea Party.”
Unfortunately, not yet scared enough. Perhaps after 2012 they finally will be:
WALMART GREETER: “Welcome to Wal-Mart.”
WAL-MART CUSTOMER: “Aren’t you John Boehner?”
WAL-MART GREETER: “Umm…yes.”
I like the ejector seats. We could have the dome of the capital slide open very slowly as the congressmen nervously look at each other and then BAM! Some idiot Democrat or RINO is launched to the Moon which we will be Nuking very soon!
what if we line the inside of the dome with exposed re-bar (like in Bullet Storm game) then eject them into that. Would work as a visual deterant as well as a functional art piece