Archive of entries posted on August 2012

Why you so stupid?

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All you people that don’t think Barack Obama is awesome and wonderful and a gift sent down from Heaven are just too stupid to understand what he’s trying to do.

You know, as good a communicator as he is, it would still take Barack Obama six months to explain something to you. That’s what he told Time magazine.

The president says he also wants to do a better job of explaining to the public how his policies will help the economy grow. Obama claims he didn’t do a good enough job selling Americans on the stimulus plan and the auto company bailout because he was so focused on acting to fix the economy.

“[W]e were in the midst of a once-in-a-lifetime crisis, so we had to just do stuff fast. And sometimes it wasn’t popular,” Obama told Time. “And we didn’t have the luxury of six months to explain exactly what we were doing with the Recovery Act, which was basically a jobs act and making-sure-middle-class-families-didn’t-fall-into-poverty act.”

So, it’s your fault. If you weren’t so darn stupid, it wouldn’t take him six months to explain everything to you.

And, if you were just smart enough to understand what he was doing, it would have worked. So, but because you’re so stupid and didn’t understand what he was doing, all that money he pissed away didn’t help.

Try to not be so stupid.

Disaster Contest…

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Last week, I posted a photoshop I had made of a highway. You might have seen it…

It took a lot of work to create that. More than you want to know. Now I am challenging you to do as good… or better!

Lucky for you, I did the hard part already, and I’m sharing the template below.

Your task, replace the tornado with another apt disaster that looms ahead if we “KEEP LEFT” and keep going “Forward” instead of taking that last exit.

I already know some of the other ideas I had before deciding to go with the tornado, and I suspect some of you will come up with those. I’m also hoping to see some ideas I never even thought of.

As always, the winners get their work posted here and receive “HIGH PRAISE!”

If you’d like, you can post your entries on your own sites, I just ask that you link this post if you do.

The following instructions are cryptic to keep the spambots confused. If you cannot decipher the instructions, I do not want to receive your entry anyway!

Send your entries to me, Mr. Right, via the letter after “d” mail using this address with all of the stupid colons removed, no spaces or brackets, and the proper punctuation added…

write:the:right:place [a-in-a-circle-thingy] [the letter before h:mail] [period-thingy] [c:o:m]

I trust you can decode that okay? Good!

Please submit final versions as gif files, if at all possible, and try to keep the size at 960 x 720, just as the template is now. You can play with the highway signs and the foreground if you really want to, but you better come up with something good if you do!

Now, here’s the template I promised…

We’ll let the contest run until sometime on Labor Day afternoon before posting the worthy entries, and then the rest of the Moon-Nukers can decide whose is the most bacon-worthy. Let the apocalypse commence!

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UPDATE 9/3/12 2:15PM CDT

The winners have now been posted!

Not Quite Time to Panic

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The auto-scheduling feature at IMAO is on the fritz right now, so posts might show up late now & then until Basil figures out how much bacon he needs to sacrifice to the computer gods.

So far, he’s killed enough pigs on this project to take Carrie to the prom, but he’s not a quitter.

Hang tough, Nukers.

The C-Word

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Seems a Republican used the C-Word.

No, not cancer. That’s the Democrats that are saying Mitt Romney gives people cancer.

No, not, um, ah, uh, hmm, uh, “see you next Tuesday” either.

Seems there’s a new C-Word that you can’t say. According to NewsBusters, Chris Mathews said that saying “Chicago” is racist. Why? Because there’s a lot of black people living there.

I assume calling someone a “Washington insider” will be racist, since there are a bunch of black people living there, too.

So, we have a new C-Word, another word we can’t say.

I have a list of words I never want to hear Chris Mathews ever to say again. The list can be found between the front and back covers of The Unabridged American Dictionary.

A Moment With Joe Biden: Unemployment

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[by Son of Bob]

And now, a moment with Joe Biden

BIDEN: …so, when people ask me about unemployment I always tell them that story. Because, I’ve met so many people who have suffered from unemployment. I know what it’s like to look in the eyes of someone who’s been fired from his or her job, or has suffered financially from what George Bush and the Republicans have done to this economy. It’s not easy. It’s not easy to look at these people, and see them suffering; it tears at you. And, evenings, over dinner, I’ll look over at Jill and say, “Ya know babe, here Consuelo prepared these beautiful fillets but my gut’s so tore up I can barely force myself to have seconds.” ‘Cause it seems like the longer Barack is in the White House, the more people we meet that are out of work out there because of George W Bush. That’s why it’s so important that you re-elect Barack and I, keep us here in Washington to finish what we started…

This has been a moment with Joe Biden.

Obama Didn’t Sign That

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Remember that Chinook helicopter that went down in Afghanistan last year and killed 30 Americans?

Well apparently Obama decided to follow tradition as president and send the families of the fallen letters expressing his condolences and such. You know, personal letters signed by the president. It’s not much, but at least it is a little something. Right?

From Gateway Pundit:

Their letters were all the same.
Form letters – signed by an electric pen.

Classy. I’m surprised Obama didn’t also send a photo of himself with the letters.

Check out the link for shiny pictures and the full story.