Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The reason it cost Joe Biden $321,665 for limousine rides…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The reason it cost Joe Biden $321,665 for limousine rides…
…Shotgun shells cost a lot of money.
They buy new cars every time he shoots through the door.
…because diesel costs more than gasoline…(especially when run in a regular gasoline engine)
…because its Bush’s fault.
because he’s stupid !
…is they had to keep stopping because he kept getting out of the kiddie seat.
The salesman told him renting was a sucker bet, and in the long run you would *save* money if you bought the vehicle outright. So he did, for every trip. Think of how much money he saved!
He needed a fleet to fit all of his friends and relatives that inspire his speeches.
“Wait, that’s a comma? I thought it was a decimal. You should go back and check to see if you did the math right.”
…because he’ll only ride in it, when its riding in Air Force One.
…Air Force Two is tied to the back bumper.
…it’s the only company that will let him play with the electric door locks for the entire ride.
…the limo company must have paid for his ticket to Euro Disney
…WHAT. DIFFERENCE. DOES. IT. MAKE.
…is the limo driver gets paid the regular French limo driver union rate while in France – the driver actually earned 6 weeks’ vacation for that day of work.
…not sure, but there’s a rather high “Secret Service entertainment” charge on this bill….
…Biden didn’t realize the tip was already included so he put on an extra $50
…boy they really get you on the conversion rate!
…how much would YOU charge to put up with Vice President Numbnuts for a whole day????
…is because he calculated the 20% tip in his head.
…….that’s the amount the companies claimed in damages after Joe runs along side and bites the tires.
…have you ever tried cleaning senile old man drool off of a leather interior? That limo was getting detailed for days.
…cause after the sequester cuts, they couldn’t spend the $400,000 they’d normally spend.
…Joe wanted to splurge on the limo with the hot tub since he saved all that money taking the train to Delaware instead of Air Force II
…hey, it’s not real money…it’s tax money.
– it turns out his Depends aren’t so dependable.
(1 )He can’t remember where he lives…..(2) $ 5 Ho’s now cost $ 1500 hr. (3) It’s hard to remember anything when your really, really stupid (4) The limo is made from Hope and Change and drinks up gas as fast as a NYC school teacher can download child porn. (5) Big time Joe is a Big Time Tipper
…Joe’s driving and he keeps making a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
…is because when someone said “limousines” he heard “lima beans” and Joe loves his lima beans, so he ordered a whole bunch
…is because he keeps forgetting where he parked
…is because he mandated that due to national security reasons, every limo must be outfitted with the full armaments from Duke Nukem 3D
…is because after watching men in black, he requires all limos to have a red button that lets them drive on tunnel ceilings
…is because installing an Omega 13 isn’t cheap
…what, you don’t think we really pay $1000 for a toilet seat or $321,665 for limo rides, do you?
…was the extra armor required in those limo’s to protect him from (*gasp*) GUNS!
it’s called a “sliding tube scale” based on the tubulousnous of the customer; base price is $12.50.
….was because Biden was teaching the new Pope how to drive and text at the same time while in Rome.
…’cause he didn’t also book the $500,000.00 a night stay at the Lincoln bedroom.
…he went through Travelocity… and forgot his hat…
…because like Obamacare… you have to ride in it first, before you find out what it costs.
…was he asked to see all the places where France had surrendered.
… he acted like a typical man and refused to ask for directions.
… the sequester affects funding for GPS satellites and he got lost.
… he can only ride in GM built, all-electric limos.
…”Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads!”…**CRASH**…”Well, I guess we did need roads after all”
…321665 is his limo driver’s ID number, not his fee.
The limos didn’t come with sun roofs, so Joe ordered ’em all customized as such so he can stand up while the car is in motion and play with his pinwheel and go “WEEEEEEEE!!” like a real ambulance!
…four words: custom, made, car, seats
…union drivers.
for the same reason a hammer costs $5000
…because its 106 miles to Chicago, he’s gotta half pack of cigarettes, a full tank of gas, it’s night, and he’s wearing sunglasses.
is congressional earmarks.
…is because he got the senior citizen’s discount.
…the Secret Service insisted a balcony be built on it for security.
…the gun rack in back held two shotguns and an unmanned drone.
…$321,600 was for fines for overly tinted windows due to busy schedules and Joe’s nappy times.
…it was actually cheaper to build the garage out of hundred dollar bills.
because he felt threatened in the limo he blew holes in the doors with his shotgun.
… is because Trixie in the back seat gives VERY happy endings.
…because instead of Cash Cab he thought he’d start his own show — Cash Cad
…because he kept it parked in Jerry Cornelius Airtight Garage.
…Joe goes through tons of Cheerios and baby carrots out of those little snack bags.
… is because the meter’s still running: he’s never called the limo company to tell them he doesn’t need them anymore.
…is because Spritle and Chim Chim hid in the trunk and Biden got stuck paying for their shenanigans.
Deaf hookers, that won’t laugh out loud every time he opens his mouth, don’t come cheap…
It costs a little extra to lube your cigars while en route. Just ask Slick Willie.
…He kept spilling his sippy cup and it cost a lot to really clean up the Kool-Aid.
The driver suggested all the smart customers upgraded to the “Value Package”.
FIFY:
>> Deaf hookers, that won’t laugh out loud every time he
opens his mouthdrops his pants, don’t come cheap… <<Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!