Archive of entries posted on 19th March 2013

Everyone Fears a Vengeful God

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Interesting study shows that atheists get just as stressed as the religious when daring God to do bad things. You know, I never really believed in atheists; I just never thought there was good evidence they exist or could exist. I mean, Harvey could be an atheist, but that’s because he might not actually exist. But for all non-imaginary people, they eventually center their lives around some irrational beliefs — whether they acknowledge it or not — and somewhere in there will be those people’s conception of God — again whether they are conscious of it or not. And apparently everyone is afraid that that God will smite him.

God is supposed to be like nice, though, dudes. Still, I wouldn’t push Him.

We Need to Hippie Punch Our Way Out of These Arguments

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Saw from Best of the Web this opinion piece from the New York Times editorial board arguing that tax breaks are akin to government spending. Wow. How sick and twisted do you have to be to consider letting people keep their hard-earned money a government expense? I don’t even know how you reason with someone like that. You probably just have to punch the hippie.

“The biggest government expense are tax cuts!”

**PUNCH!**

“Ow! But if you look at how tax breaks are factored in the budget–”

**PUNCH!**

“Ow! I’m just–”

**PUNCH**

“…”

Argument won!

The country has a lot of problems right now, and it will require a lot of hippie punching to get through them because we don’t even have time to try and reason with these people. Like with minimum wage. Everyone is like “Duh… we should raise minimum wage. Then we should raise it again! And again! Now everybody rich!” Trying to explain the economics to these people is just way too hard; much easier would be to have business owners punch supporters of raising the minimum wage in the face. If people are punched by enough business owners, they’ll learn to avoid messing with businesses so they don’t get punched. Hippie punching isn’t the same as convincing people, but it gets the same result. And right now with as bad as things are, that’s what we need to focus on.

Random Thoughts: Obama Satan

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The left doesn’t celebrate Republicans being for SSM because their main interest in the issue is as a political cudgel.

“Bow down and worship me and I will give you free health care.” #ObamaSatan

“Jump off this building and trust government programs to catch you.” #ObamaSatan

“Why go hungry? Can you not change these jobs into foodstamps?” #ObamaSatan

“The fall of man was the fault of the previous devil.” #ObamaSatan

“Not only should you eat the forbidden fruit, but you have a right to it and it should be subsidized.” #ObamaSatan

“If this is paradise that the Lord has made you, where is the free birth control?” #ObamaSatan

“Were you going to be in this desert awhile? I might play a couple rounds and tempt you later if that’s okay.” #ObamaSatan

“I promise the most transparent evil scheming ever.” #ObamaSatan

“God didn’t build that.” #ObamaSatan

“I’ve never once run a planet, but I’m still sure I can tell God how to run the universe better.” #ObamaSatan

The secret to being really smart is to constantly put yourself in situations where you feel really dumb.

Anyone who considers tax breaks to be “government spending” should get a musket to the junk.

Musket to the junk is how the Founding Fathers handled Communists.

Of course, it’s not until after he was reelected that the media finally brings up that Obama looks like Satan.

Got way too excited when a mousetrap got a mouse perfectly on the neck. Hate dealing with live ones.