Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
Daily “Phrase that Pays” calls. Winners get a cookie.
Sell it to Fox.
Extra point kick after every story.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
Stop accepting news copy from the DNC.
Try reporting actual news stories in between SpongeBob episodes.
More Clevedge.
Celebrity judges.
New Show: So you think you can read a teleprompter.
Issue challenge flags to conservative viewers.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
More Cowbell!
Replace all the anchors with puppies. Everyone loves puppies.
Replace the staff with the writers from “Archer.”
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
Gong SHow format for news reporting.
Anonymiss cookies at all staff meetings.
merge with Al-Jazeera
Run Fox News clips during commercials.
Other Ways to Improve CNN…
* Turn it into a public access channel
* 800 numbers for viewers to vote on the stories
* Replace “Anderson Cooper 360” with a new show, “The History of Porn.”
* Replace the Atlanta set with Thunderdome.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
start a war with MSNBC, use real ammo.
improve it to what?
better scriptwriting, is Joss Whedon available?
Say “ba-zinga” after each story.
Every time they give the “Coming up next….” lede, play overly dramatic music and do an extreme close-up.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
force everyone to watch it at Airports. Oh wait…
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
swap out all the anchors with Sports Center hosts. Well, except for the Olbermann dude.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
add cup holders. Can never have enough cup holders. And make ’em big enough for a Big Gulp daggummit!
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
Put Jane Fonda on the screen today
Convince the liberals it’s okay
Then let’s get dressed and dance away the night
While they:
Kill kill kill kill Kill the poor:Tonight
…would include replacing their current crop of anchors with Jon Stewart, Steven Colbert and Bill Maher – new tag-line “We Snark, You Decide”
Move its office to the moon. Then nuke it.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
… SpongeBob and Patrick deliver the news stories.
… Have Frank J edit the stories.
… Have CNN predict the winner of the Superbowl will be Denver – by thirty !!!
… Fewer news stories and more cartoons. (Eventually, no news stories at all.)
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
MST3K CNN Edition. CAMBOT!
…find better news…
@18 – Hey, what if dag really did gummit !!!
@25 Durned iffin I know.
@5 Oh my gosh still laughing. Cookies to FormerHostage!!!! 😀
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
…display the Indian Head Test Pattern 24/7
…play their broadcasts in reverse.
…Hire newsbabes and put the broad back in broadcasting
…go to a weather forcast / music video format. The Weather Channel and MTV forgot how
All Captain Kangaroo reruns, all the time.
@29 Mister Moose Rocks !!!
…have the President sign an executive order mandating that everyone watch CNN or pay a
finepenaltytax** Approved and rewritten by Justice Roberts
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
anyone who watches….Free Healthcare and abortions!
Other ways to improve CNN… Burn it down.
No…. wait! There is a money making opportunity here….
Line up all of the staff from CNN. Charge the public and let them kick one of them in the ‘nads. $5 per kick, or three kicks for $10.
…televise the 99.999999 % who choose three kicks to the groin rather than watch CNN.
…return to it’s last ratings booster of Al Bundy’s nose hair webcam and show it 24/7.
…get NBC to tabulate their ratings.
…sneak some fish into the monkey writers bananas.
…even cheapo animation with voice over would be better than the microscope and petri dish at the STD clinic now used for studio shots.
oopsie, looks like Chip was quicker on the nad kick bandwagon.
…replace studio camera shots with cat avatars for news readers.
…carry on as usual, but all audio from free sample of chocolate on aisle four of the nearby Kroger store.
…hourly Pope updates with Sinead O’Connor.
…would be a return to CNN’s tried-and-true ratings driver – hope for a telegenic high-tech-based shooting war between a superpower and a Third World basket case, send in Wolf Blitzer, then rake in the ratings gold…
…hire strippers that can read and start the first Naked News Network (N^3!).
their tag line could be “who cares about accuracy?”…or just “boobs”
…Put Candy Crowley on with Piers Morgan to back him up every time he makes up a story.
Do NOT under any circumstances put Candy Crowley on the Naked News Network!!!
Have the network broadcast all its programming in ’60s-style “Supermarionation” ala “Thunderbirds”.
Broadcast it all in mime.
@3 – Wow dude, welcome back. Where have you been?
… The cable box automatically changes the channel to Fox.
… The cable box automatically switches to a Walking Dead marathon.
… The cable box automatically turns off.
… Replacing CNN news with Ninja Turtles.
…bring in some big name newsmen from Fox, like Tom Tucker and Kent Brockman.
… the Squidward News Hour.
Larry King said CNN should play SpongeBob episodes between news stories. Other ways to improve CNN…
LOOK! Squirrels!
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