Wednesday Night Open Thread

I thought about posting a song called “Heroes” but I decided this video of a hero would be better.

[The YouTube]

So, what’s on your mind? Got something to share? It’s Wednesday Night Open Thread, and you control the conversation.

Who wants to start?

Only Partially Thought Out

ISIS has released a new video threatening the US, saying “now is the time to rise and slit their throats“.

So… their plan for global domination is to perform my favorite 15 seconds of “Raiders of the Lost Ark” on a national scale?

You KNOW You’ve Always Wondered

[Death Star Construction Timelapse] (Viewer #519,851)

I’d expect more radial structural supports, but it’s still a fun little thought experiment.

Link of the Day: Democrats Master Failing Strategy

[High Praise! to Townhall]

Desperation Time As Democrats Seek to Stop Trump From Succeeding

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Icebreaker: What Was Your First Job?

I’m gonna try something new, audience participation-wise… see if maybe I can get some lurkers to out themselves.

Or just let the regulars have some fun. Either way.

I found a list called “The 25 most popular icebreaker questions based on four years of data“. So I’m gonna post a few, and see what happens.

Your mission: answer the question in the comments with a good story.

If you don’t have a good story, you are encouraged to make one up.

What was your first job?

Me? Back when I was a teenager, I was very liberal, and I used to do a job (technically an “unpaid internship”) for Greenpeace. My gig was scraping barnacles off of whales.

Which I quit after a week once I found out what lousy tippers whales are.

Now You Don’t Need to Read Facebook Anymore Because I Found the One Good Thing on It

[Submitted by Slapout (High Praise!)]

Straight Line of the Day: Amazon Is Creating a Health Care Company. Among Its Innovative Features…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…

The Illustrated Frank J: At Least It Has a Warm, Glowing, Warming Glow

[source]

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Random Thoughts: State of the Union and Undoing The Last Jedi

Two Part Plan to Reform Politics
1. Pass law that people in Congress are only allowed to talk when they have the talking stick
2. Destroy talking stick

It’s pretty amazing that Get Out is Jordan Peele’s only director credit.

First they came for the Nazis, and I didn’t say anything because I wasn’t a Nazi.
…No, wait, I said, “Awesome!”
Then they came for the Commies, and I said, “Good. For a moment I was afraid you’d stop with the Nazis.”
And then things were good.

Before joining a secret society, ask a lot of questions. If they answer any of them, it’s not a good secret society.

Trying to teach my 2yo to say, “Ha ha, father. How droll.” after I tease her instead of just scream.

If you’re involved with the doomsday clock, you should not be allowed to call yourself a scientist.

This isn’t that complicated. Scientifically, human life begins at conception. The area for debate is the religious question of when do you give value to that life, a debate science can inform but not decide.

Man, I’ve seen a lot of people on the left lately complaining about the NYT not being left-wing biased enough. Sounds like winners.
They need to believe their positions are so good that even the slightest challenge is a huge betrayal, but in fact their ideas are terrible which is why they are so sensitive to them being challenged as they lack the ability to defend them by anything other than spewing emotion.
You would think the antidote to Trump would be some sort of reasoned, intellectual analysis, but everyone is instead just trying to out-dumb him. And succeeding.

Hillary Clinton’s current purpose is to make us feel better about electing Trump and that is very noble of her.

Drove through a whole town in Texas where my Verizon phone only had one bar of 1X coverage. I don’t know how you’d live like that.

I don’t understand why anyone would want to listen to a State of the Union address.

Did they give another Grammy to Hillary?

Congratulations to the winners and my sympathy to the losers, i.e., anyone who watched the Grammys.

Remember when Obama got a Nobel Peace Prize just for existing?
I don’t miss that guy. I’d rather a terrible president people are overly critical of than a terrible president people are constantly trying to prop up as something great.
Even better would be a terrible president people are correctly critical of so their good criticism of him are constantly drowned out by their really dumb ones.
I guess even better than that would be some sort of non-terrible president, but I don’t see the point in venturing into the realm of scifi or fantasy.

Putting Hillary Clinton on reading The Fire and the Fury to anger the right is a bit like someone on the right drinking a gallon of feces on video in an attempt to “trigger the libs.”

I’m reading this book “Heads You Lose” where two people alternate writing chapters and they keep passive-aggressively fighting each other by cutting off each other’s plot threads, and I realized what it reminded me of: the current Star Wars trilogy.

I’m hoping JJ Abrams opens Episode IX by revealing Snoke had Kylo fake his death, Luke only transported himself and didn’t die, and Rose and Holdo are working for the New Order and we were right to hate them.

“Kylo, did you make sure Rey didn’t find out the really interesting secret about her parents?”
“Yes, Snoke, I lied to her about that. BTW, we found some boy on the casino planet who can use the force.”

“I don’t care about that. That’s dumb. Don’t bring that up again.”

“Rose, did you kill Finn?”

“Sorry, Master Snoke, I tried, but he survived me crashing into him. Then I had to come up with some excuse about love or some garbage. I don’t think he bought it. It was very forced.”

“Holdo, did you fool the Resistance?”

“Yes, Snoke, I told them I had to stay behind to pilot the ship–though that’s stupid. Then I made it look like I used the ship as some sort of hyperspace missile–though that’s obviously preposterous or everyone would do that all the time.”

Meanwhile, Luke appears before Rey.
“Are you a force ghost, Master Luke?”
“No, I used the force to transport myself. As long as we’re making up force powers, I can do that. Also, me being cranky and hating the force was a test.”
“Did I pass it?”
“Dunno. It was a stupid test.”

I’m a cord cutter, so I need to figure out the cheapest way I can still watch curling this Winter Olympics.

What are we supposed to do on Twitter while Trump is too busy giving some dumb speech to tweet?

Trump smashes the teleprompter with a baseball bat
“I’ve decided to speak from the heart.”

“So I saw this movie, The Purge, and it got me thinking…” #SOTU

I hope Trump announces some cool new infrastructure project to bring us lot of jobs like a bridge to the moon. I’ve always wanted to mix cement. #SOTU

They really got a Kennedy for the SOTU response? That’s not a joke? They at least made sure this is one who didn’t drown or sexually assault any women, right?

Once again, it’s the party with dumb new ideas versus the one with no new ideas.

“Pence, are the Democrats booing the country?”
“Oh no, they’re not booing the country, sir, they’re shouting, ‘Boo-S-A! Boo-S-A!’”

So what was the Kennedy response?
“I had my butler read me an article about poverty; it sounds horrible.”

“We have to get rid of these jokers and replace them with these clowns.” -partisans

What if in future Trump wrote all his tweets from a teleprompter?

Having a Kennedy give the response was just smart politics plus it’s great cross-promotion for that Chappaquiddick movie coming out.

The words of politicians are so cheap. I don’t know why we keep engaging in this theater like they mean anything.

Fake Lives Matter

Worst kept secret: a company that has over 3.5 million fake Twitter accounts selling follows and retweets to celebrities looking to appear more popular than they really are.

The worst part – Democrats pushing to get amnesty and voting rights for every account.

Tuesday Night Open Thread

I was all ready to post a recording of Bobby Darin’s “Beyond the Sea” tonight. In fact, I did. But then I realized I posted that back in September.

So, I could either do a rerun, or post a different version of the song. Here’s the original version of that tune, and it’s not by Bobby Darin. Actually, it’s not the original, but it is by the guy that wrote it. And that’s good enough.

[The YouTube]

What would you like to talk about. Tuesday Night Open Thread means nothing is off limits.

What’s on your mind?

Has NOBODY Seen the Original Westworld?

Already a thing in NYC – clubs with robot exotic dancers on the poles.

This is not a healthy trend. My toaster already got sued for harassment.

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Nuclear Wessels

[What Causes a Foreign Accent?] (Viewer #5,733)

The only good foreigner is an improperly enunciating foreigner

[title reference link]

Link of the Day: I Predict All of These Will Happen During Trump’s First State of the Union Address

[High Praise! to Stilton’s Place]

Stand-Up State of the Union

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Someone Buy Google a Dictionary

When asked who Jesus Christ is, the Google Home smart speaker replies “I’m not sure how to help you with that.”

In unrelated news, Google Home owners report a higher-than-average incidence of lighting strikes on their devices.