Time to retire some more polls.
No one appreciates Potsy.
Who is the greatest figure in American history?
Answers Percent Votes
Potsy – 36 votes (13%)
The “Time to make the donuts!” guy – 135 votes (49%)
The Riddler – 57 votes (21%)
Tonya Harding – 47 votes (17%)
I honestly can’t remember what any of these words mean. I guess no one likes adjectives that have “homo” in them.
What best describes your political views?
Homokaryotic – 20 votes (12%)
Orthogonal – 62 votes (36%)
Dioecious – 33 votes (19%)
Paraxial – 58 votes (34%)
If the moonlight was pale, how could you be sure you were dancing with the devil?
Ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?
Yes – 52 votes (21%)
No – 71 votes (28%)
The moon light was actually quite bright – 129 votes (51%)
Well, as long as you know you’re hellbound…
What are your religious views?
I believe in the Catholic faith. – 68 votes (25%)
2. I’m hellbound. – 124 votes (45%)
3. Hey, that’s mean! – 84 votes (30%)
Yes! Seek vengeance!
If IMAO were shut down, what would you do?
Kill myself – 9 votes (3%)
Kill others – 54 votes (17%)
Take vengeance against Instapundit.com – 142 votes (45%)
Not rest until all monkeys are dead – 114 votes (36%)
I think people are drastically underestimating Snuggles the Bear.
Who would win in a fight between the Aflac Duck and Snuggles the Bear?
The Aflac Duck – 246 votes (75%)
Snuggles the Bear – 67 votes (21%)
It’s a tie – 13 votes (4%)
Yes, let him forever be remembered as the governor with no name.
Should California Governor Gray Davis be recalled?
Yes. – 47 votes (21%)
Yes, but only when trying to think of a list of ineffectual governors. – 53 votes (23%)
No, he should forever be erased from our collective memories. – 127 votes (56%)
I say it would be a tie, as it would end in a killing spree as soon as one of them encountered a word he couldn’t spell.
Who would win in a spelling bee between Wolverine and the Punisher?
Wolverine – 87 votes (41%)
The Punisher – 76 votes (36%)
It’s a tie – 51 votes (24%)
I’ll try to come up with some more polls as there is still more to learn.

Man, it was hard picking the winning entry from those available, but, in the end, I had to go with the first one that made me laugh out loud:

“Oswald was a pussy!”

It was written by Tim B., and, as for the super secret prize – so secret that I just decided what it is right now – he gets a limerick of praise:

Hooray for the triumphant Tim B.
He displayed his acumen for all us to see.
He saw the sniper kitty,
and made a caption so witty,
That it filled all our hearts with glee.