Nuke the Moon: It’s back!
This is your chance to get in the Peace Gallery. Also, if you’ve never actually read the essay, you’re and idiot and I have nothing but contempt for you. Plus, there’s the special NTM IMW.
BTW, there is now a quote from me on ThoseShirts.com on the main page, plus I have a new description for the KTE:French Shirt. Man, I never did come up with a good promotional idea for my educational shirts. Maybe pictures of people teaching kids to hate the French and Terrorists.
Everybody’s Happy: So Israel kills Rantisi, and you think everybody should be happy. Israel should have one less terrorist to deal with, and Rantisi gets 72 virgins, but the Palestinians act mad, saying how they’re going to really, really try to kill Israelis now (like what they were doing before?). That’s crazy. If I were an Israeli official, I’d say, “You Palestinians should be happy we help you get your virgins… unless you don’t actually believe in your religion. If that’s the case, then shame!”
Targeted Fun: Man, targeted killing sounds so cool. I wish we Americans had people to cruise missile. Maybe we could do that to Munchie (Sadr). I think Israel doesn’t exploit targeted killings enough, though. They really should have cameras on the front of the missiles and then have a show called “Terrorists Funniest Last Expressions”.
Keeping It Up: Bush is leading Kerry in the polls now, which is good because I don’t like Kerry. I think a lot of that has to do with him being a Democrat. I don’t like Democrats.
Ooh! I need to do a Know Thy Enemy™ about Democrats before the election. Already have one planned for tomorrow.
The Spench: Bush scolded the Spaniards for pulling out their troops, saying, “You cowardly, unwashed Spaniards! I spit on your mothers!” Actually, I don’t know what he said, I didn’t have time to read the article. Anyway, I’m sure this gives comfort to our enemies which means more killing will be needed to settle things. That will make the Marines happy, but not the Iraqis.
Got Your Six: The Barking Moonbat has a poll about which blogger would you want to cover your six in a foxhole in Fallujah (are there foxholes in Fallujah?). I’m not doing so well. I remind you I’m a very good aim (I’ll have a post with pictures later today to prove it), and could easily shoot you in the back of the head if you don’t trust me. So go vote for me.
Bad Fans: Camille doesn’t think my fan clubs are doing a great job. I really don’t know what fan clubs are supposed to do, never having joined one (why would I have to look up to someone else when I’m me?). What do you think you should do? Should we have nickname like Jonah’s fans? They’re called “Flying Monkeys” which is evil. I suggest my fans be called “ronins”. What do you think?
Secret Stuff: Apparently, most people have now decrypted the message and followed the instructions (thanks to Orion). The first mission will be posted soon. This is going to be such cool spy stuff I wish I were you.
No I don’t; it’s cool being me… master spy!
Anyway, remember the first and second rules…
The Limey: The Limey sent me another e-mail and its really long and I didn’t even bother reading it yet. To be honest, I’ve kinda gotten tired of his shtick. This will be the tenth, so maybe I should make it the series finale. Do you think I should wait to respond until after May 1st to see if capitalism falls on that day like he says?
Once I’m done with him, a reader (sorry, I forgot who; tell me in the comments) sent me this to get rid of him.
Almost There: Look at these two Cox & Forkum comics that Baldilocks put together (and the first was made right after Yassin was killed making it somewhat prescient).
Lazy Babes: There’s still a week left to enter the contest, but I’m a little antsy that very few have entered the IMAO T-Shirt Babe Contest so far (and thanks to those who have). Are you all waiting for the last minute? I hope the reissue of the Nuke the Moon T-Shirt is enough to motivate you to get off your lazy babe asses.
Since there have been some questions, I might have an entry FAQ tomorrow at the one week deadline.
Me Busy: Sorry to have so little, but Monday nights I have martial arts followed by my writing group followed by bed (BTW, if people are interested, maybe I could share some of my writing with the ronin; damn, that reminds me – I need to get to writing that freak’n column so I can steal Jonah’s job!). To help, maybe next Monday I can put up a post where you can all comment on the topics of the day so I know what to write about Tuesday morning.
I have some photos of the results of my recent trip to the shooting range which I’ll share with you later today if you are all good.
Ciao.
Another Limey email eh? I think it’s a good idea to make this one the series finale. I would like to see it soon, if possible, ’cause the stupiud bastrad may have finally acknowledged me, and it’d be kewl to be a dangerous, hated and feared rival of his.
Oh wait. I already am. Haha.
-The Real Conservative Carl
aka The Half-Elven Commie Slayer
I really really really really really really wish the Limey lived next door to me so I could kick him in his nuts because im an evil war/hatemongering conservative republican who lives in the south and despises newly wed interracial homosexuals burning an american flag. And Limeys. And Commies. And anyone who doesn’t agree with me.
Not for lack of worship of you, Frank, but I voted for Kim. He’s got a LOT more ‘peace enablers’ in his cabinet.
I agree, make it the last for the Limey. His shtick is getting mighty stale and starting to smell like a Frenchie.
Frank, cover six of my what? I don’t have exactly six of anything.
I think what the liberal press… SLAP… world conscience wants is for Isreali’s to play fair. Answering 12-year-old girl homicide… SLAP(again)… suicide bombers with cruise missles is just not fair. I mean, really – do you know how hard it is to perform a surgical strike with a 12-year-old girl and 20lbs of C2? I mean, the kid could get destracted by a pizza or a school bus and blow up the wrong thing. And then the Heebs use highly accurate missiles that kill only the intended target? How fair is that?
So, Heebs (sorry, but Jooos is just roood) should be recruiting 12-year-old Pali girls for bombing missions. That would even the playing field and win the hearts and minds of the liberal media… SLAP SLAP… common people.
Frank,
First you want a 200 word essay on why we should be the IMAO T-Shirt Babe, then you give us this code to decrypt which requires me to go out and hire a Navajo wind-engineer (I live in Arizona so that part wasn’t too difficult). You’re making too much work for us while you go off and play Mr. Fu-Manchu at your martial arts class. Who’s the Lazy Babe here??
P.S. I like the name “Ronin”. It’s one of my favorite movies.
I’m with you, jonag..Between pretending to be busy at work, decoding the message, and pretending to be busy at work some more, I haven’t had time to write an essay..Plus I need to borrow a digital camera to get the pic taken.. Hmmmmm…maybe I’m not such a babe after all..
“I think Israel doesn’t exploit targeted killings enough, though. They really should have cameras on the front of the missiles and then have a show called “Terrorists Funniest Last Expressions”.”
How ’bout this one:
“Next week on Fox: Fast Missiles, Slow Terrorists”.
I think you should wait until after May 1, then make fun of him and never post his stuff again, because it’s definitely getting old. It’s only checks 12 days away. Make him wait.
And how can you call jonag lazy when you haven’t even written that column yet? Do you want Jonah’s job or not?
Right-Wing-News has come up with a new poll. If you were stuck on a desert island with just ten bloggers …. which ten would it be? The results are quite interesting ……….. Not being a team to flinch from adversity,…
Your Winning in the Polls now, congrats…
I voted for you I swear, dont shoot me.
Then again, if I’m beyond 7yds and you dont have your Colt Anaconda, I may have a chance.
Frank, the Babes aren’t lazy, we’re making you tremble with anticipation! I’m for being a Ronin, it makes us sound more legit and spyish… and yes, the Limey has outlived his usefulness.
You have to admit that having Kim du Toit around in a firefight wouldnt be a bad idea… I think he’s better armed than most of the guys were fighting over there.
Frank, I think you should hold off on posting the limey for awhile, and bring him back when you need a “sweeps” boost.
Keep writing the e-mails, but save them for when you don’t have much time to do new things.
Jonah fans are flying monkeys?
Sorta makes my blog name ironic or something, doesn’t it? Especially considering I’m the one running the Frank J Fan Club Blog as well (runnning it into the ground I guess if you listen to camille) but running it just the same. Well, I’m sending her an invitation to be part of the problem or part of the solution. Whichever.
The Ronin Space Ronin Chronicles, nahh, just doesn’t work.
I see America’s ABC network is in the crapper on account of its shows pretty much blow ropey goat chunks, except Alias. Well, Frank J has a sure-fire ratings winner… I think Israel doesn’t exploit targeted killings enough, though. They…
With Frank J getting bored of him, the Limey is looking for new people to annoy. It’s barely even interesting, but even I got an e-mail from Tony “wanker” Pentin….
First (third time)
Can’t wait for range pics!
Aw rats! Second. 🙁 Maybe next time, lol. 🙂
BTW, Frank I voted for you to cover my six in Fallujah. Ooh-rah!
In My World suggestion: Kerry is visited by the ghost of the real JFK.
Another Limey email eh? I think it’s a good idea to make this one the series finale. I would like to see it soon, if possible, ’cause the stupiud bastrad may have finally acknowledged me, and it’d be kewl to be a dangerous, hated and feared rival of his.
Oh wait. I already am. Haha.
-The Real Conservative Carl
aka The Half-Elven Commie Slayer
I really really really really really really wish the Limey lived next door to me so I could kick him in his nuts because im an evil war/hatemongering conservative republican who lives in the south and despises newly wed interracial homosexuals burning an american flag. And Limeys. And Commies. And anyone who doesn’t agree with me.
Not for lack of worship of you, Frank, but I voted for Kim. He’s got a LOT more ‘peace enablers’ in his cabinet.
I agree, make it the last for the Limey. His shtick is getting mighty stale and starting to smell like a Frenchie.
Ah, you gotta post his (Limey) shize till 1 May, then if something blows up, MI6 can find out of he’s really a collaborator!
Shouldn’t that be “Rantisi gets 72 raisins“?
Googlebomb them to the top!
cowards
Frank, cover six of my what? I don’t have exactly six of anything.
I think what the liberal press… SLAP… world conscience wants is for Isreali’s to play fair. Answering 12-year-old girl homicide… SLAP(again)… suicide bombers with cruise missles is just not fair. I mean, really – do you know how hard it is to perform a surgical strike with a 12-year-old girl and 20lbs of C2? I mean, the kid could get destracted by a pizza or a school bus and blow up the wrong thing. And then the Heebs use highly accurate missiles that kill only the intended target? How fair is that?
So, Heebs (sorry, but Jooos is just roood) should be recruiting 12-year-old Pali girls for bombing missions. That would even the playing field and win the hearts and minds of the liberal media… SLAP SLAP… common people.
Frank,
First you want a 200 word essay on why we should be the IMAO T-Shirt Babe, then you give us this code to decrypt which requires me to go out and hire a Navajo wind-engineer (I live in Arizona so that part wasn’t too difficult). You’re making too much work for us while you go off and play Mr. Fu-Manchu at your martial arts class. Who’s the Lazy Babe here??
P.S. I like the name “Ronin”. It’s one of my favorite movies.
jonag,
200 word max. You can write as little as you want.
And Orion made a program to make the decryption simple.
Lazy…
I’m with you, jonag..Between pretending to be busy at work, decoding the message, and pretending to be busy at work some more, I haven’t had time to write an essay..Plus I need to borrow a digital camera to get the pic taken.. Hmmmmm…maybe I’m not such a babe after all..
Frank, 😛
Oh about the Sapniards, their leader’s last name is Zapato. It means shoe in Spanish, as in being walked all over
“I think Israel doesn’t exploit targeted killings enough, though. They really should have cameras on the front of the missiles and then have a show called “Terrorists Funniest Last Expressions”.”
How ’bout this one:
“Next week on Fox: Fast Missiles, Slow Terrorists”.
I think you should wait until after May 1, then make fun of him and never post his stuff again, because it’s definitely getting old. It’s only checks 12 days away. Make him wait.
And how can you call jonag lazy when you haven’t even written that column yet? Do you want Jonah’s job or not?
The Poll Continues
Right-Wing-News has come up with a new poll. If you were stuck on a desert island with just ten bloggers …. which ten would it be? The results are quite interesting ……….. Not being a team to flinch from adversity,…
Your Winning in the Polls now, congrats…
I voted for you I swear, dont shoot me.
Then again, if I’m beyond 7yds and you dont have your Colt Anaconda, I may have a chance.
Frank, the Babes aren’t lazy, we’re making you tremble with anticipation! I’m for being a Ronin, it makes us sound more legit and spyish… and yes, the Limey has outlived his usefulness.
You have to admit that having Kim du Toit around in a firefight wouldnt be a bad idea… I think he’s better armed than most of the guys were fighting over there.
Frank, I think you should hold off on posting the limey for awhile, and bring him back when you need a “sweeps” boost.
Keep writing the e-mails, but save them for when you don’t have much time to do new things.
Kill the frickin’ Limey and be done with him. What a waste of oxygen…ugh.
Jonah fans are flying monkeys?
Sorta makes my blog name ironic or something, doesn’t it? Especially considering I’m the one running the Frank J Fan Club Blog as well (runnning it into the ground I guess if you listen to camille) but running it just the same. Well, I’m sending her an invitation to be part of the problem or part of the solution. Whichever.
The Ronin Space Ronin Chronicles, nahh, just doesn’t work.
lazy babe asses
i thought this was a family blog 🙂
To: last anonymous poster.
Re: Lazy babe asses.
Where do you think families come from? (0_-)
Must-see TV
I see America’s ABC network is in the crapper on account of its shows pretty much blow ropey goat chunks, except Alias. Well, Frank J has a sure-fire ratings winner… I think Israel doesn’t exploit targeted killings enough, though. They…
The Limey
With Frank J getting bored of him, the Limey is looking for new people to annoy. It’s barely even interesting, but even I got an e-mail from Tony “wanker” Pentin….
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