NASA: Fostering Self-Esteem for Crappy Nations

So what’s the foremost mission of NASA? To explore strange new worlds? To seek out new life and new civilizations? To boldly go where no man has gone before?

No, it’s to make Muslims feel good about themselves!

Isn’t Obama making everything in America better?

Well, making Muslim nations feel good about their crappy state of affairs does seem like a challenge on par with going to the moon. As I understand, a thousand years ago, Muslims were the most technologically superior people out there. And a thousands years later, they haven’t really advanced any from that point.

Of course, maybe some people shouldn’t have self-esteem. Considering that all the Muslim nations wouldn’t be at all notable except for the fact they have oil and terrorism, maybe they should feel really bad about themselves. Feeling bad about themselves is a motivation to do better. Maybe NASA could foster that. We could have our space shuttle fly low over their countries yelling, “Look what you can’t do because you suck!” Muslim nations really do need to come to grips with how much they suck if they want to get out of their rut, and we could really help with that.

19 Comments

  1. May this is some super secret plan by NASA to solve the problems in the Middle East by sending all the Muslims into orbit? It is hard to cause problems when in geosynchronus orbit 27,000 miles up.

  2. You’re right Bob, and Obama is right there cheering them on with ” it is our..I mean America’s fault.” Was it a toss up Frank as to which one you’d make fun of first the Muslim feelings or Obama’s compassion for them?

  3. ” Feeling bad about themselves is a motivation to do better. Maybe NASA could foster that”

    100% right on the money. Unfortunately that simple truth is antithetical to leftists. Rather than motivating people to do better, the left prefers to just give out awards for “participation” and that is what they are doing here. The left is about the collective and not about winners or losers. The Muslims might not want to join Barack’s one world communist collective if we honestly point out that they are losers stuck in the 7th century.

  4. So once again we see how smart the marxist in charge is. Send lawyers to battle oil, send freaks to battle the state of Arizona, send spacemen to deal with muselims.

    The National Agency Soothing Arseholes is supposed to sooth muslims instead of explore the universe. Yup he figured out a way to waste even more of our money!

  5. Isn’t this just a little bit like giving the Queen of England an iPod? I mean, Muslim nations aren’t exactly spending their waking hours wishing, “If only we had some space accomplishments.”

    As I understand, a thousand years ago, Muslims were the most technologically superior people out there.

    Well, you would understand incorrectly, sir. The myth of Muslim technology heritage is, well, a either a total fabrication or a myth, depending on your perspective. Technology they supposedly developed during their advanced period was either borrowed or derivative.

    They lacked expertise for much of what they are now given credit. For examples, their big invention, zero, was drawn from India. The city layout of Baghdad, their second most sacred city, was actually designed by a Christian and an Indian because Muslims had no one who could do it. They relied on Christian architects for some of their most famous mosques, including the Dome of the Rock. The fleet they used to fight the Crusades was designed and built by Christians.

    And a thousands years later, they haven’t really advanced any from that point.

    Muslim clerics now decry that entire period as an anti-Islam aberration, and Bob’s your uncle, you have enduring backwardness.

  6. Man, am I dope! Here I was thinking that NASA’s job was to send people and stuff into space. No, it’s to make Muslims feel better!

    Let’s face, the Obama administration is moving beyond parody with this stuff.

  7. Next they will be sending the IRS to fight in Afghanistan and the put the Smithsonian in charge of border security.

    Its like Obama is playing Mad-libs with government agencies.

  8. Could someone please put this together – I don’t have the skills. I’m thinking of an image – NASA-LAAM ALAIKUM in Star Trek font on top, with a picture of Obama as Spock, ears and all, on his knees, giving the “Live long and prosper” hand sign below, all on a starry backdrop with a conspicuous crescent-and-star looming. Then below, same font, “LIVE LONG AND PROSTRATE”. You get the idea…

  9. Well, this could get really expensive, but there’s lots of other countries that would probably be willing to chip in to help out. What we do is build a huge fleet of Transport Ships for NASA, – big people carrying space shuttles. Then we make the Muslims feel better by shipping them all to the moon. We can tell them that finally the Palestinians have their very own “homeland” or something. There won’t be a Jooo or a Kafir within 100,000 miles. That should make them very happy.

    Then Frank raises some money by bringing back the T-Shirt that everyone wants, and we use the profits to buy a missile and NUKE THE MOON.

  10. Pingback: Bang! Zoom! Straight to the Moon! « Big Citizen

  11. I’ve got your self esteem right here. The only good Muslim country is one surrounded by a force field that keeps all the crazies in and lets NOTHING out.

    If these people are so dang smart why are they still living in the 13th century. Surely they would have evolved a little, ………..at least enough to not disenfranchise half of their population.

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