CNN’s Rick Sanchez thinks Jon Stewart is a bigot and Jews run CNN.
I don’t think Jews run CNN, but If they did:
- Instead of a headquarters in Atlanta, they’d have a timeshare in
Boca. - Every time they cover a disaster, they’d pledge fifty bucks.
- For Passover, they’d hide the liberal bias in the studio and let the
kids search for it. - Crossfire’s tagline: “One From The Left, One From The Right, Three
Opinions” - Instead of losing money, it would be profitable. But not too much. It
doesn’t want to show off. It makes enough to live on, and it’s thankful
for that. - More pointing and squinting.
- After years on television, they’d have made a movie by now, or at
least opened on Broadway.
– Hide quoted text – - AOL would have paid wholesale for Time Warner instead of retail.
- Instead of James Earl Jones saying “This is CNN.” you’d hear Gilbert
Gottfried shout “CNN: It’s Like An Orgasm Of News!” - Lawrence Harvey Zeiger wouldn’t have changed his name to Larry King.
(Zieger’s a fine name. Why change it? What, you’re not proud of it?) - And he’d have been replaced by Jon Stewart.
Came up with one more…
“Theme song by Barbara Streisand. Sung by Barbara Streisand. Live in the studio. (But billed as her “Farewell appearance” each time to keep up ticket sales.)”
Thanks,
-ls
Sarah Silverman would still be hideously unfunny.
Rick Sanchez needs to be placed immediately into a Mexicannon and fired deep into Mexico where he could become a host of a local TV show…after the Mexican Gangs are through with his lack of Machismo and Pretty Boy Gringo looks, that is…
Between every news story the reporter asks, “You think that’s bad? Let me tell you about this…”
(I didn’t notice that Frank had added a Facebook Like Button to each article. I suppose you should consider it more of a Facebook “What’s not to like?” Button for this post.)
-ls
Larry King Live replaced by Coffee Talk with Linda Richman – ratings bonanza!
Fran Drescher 360 – ratings disaster!
Wolf Blitzer would be telling keif overbite to “get off my lawn”
cnn would want a 20% discount on bill because they are stuck with hillary.
Each hnn day would open with “oi! those palestinians!”
This whole idea gives me the heebie-jeebies!
He could be right.
The Jews have been running the media for decades, or so I’ve been told.
Apparently it’s the sinecure for incompetent Jews.
If anybody reading this goes to the meetings, you should lobby to get some competent Jews in charge.
I mean, don’t you have a few extra able ones in your Mossad and weather control areas?
Welcome Back, Lair! Uh, I mean, Frank’s multiple personality.
We knew Sanchez (“How much is that in English [referring to 3 meters]”) is stupid, but we’d have thought he was at least able to read the Journolist memos. CNN has a zero tolerance policy on calling the wrong people bigots.
John Stewart is still a bigot….and a scumbag liar.
Holy crap, I didn’t realize this was Laurence.
You goes to the meetings.
Why don’t you try to get someone like Meryl Yourish in charge of the media?
I mean, really. You people are so good with your mind rays, spy squirrels and killer balloons I would think running the media would be child’s play.
I hear Mr. Sanchez is trying to get Mike Rowe’s gig on Dirty Jobs on Discovery. His pitch is that then they could announce:
Up next, Dirty Jobs with Rick “Dirty” Sanchez.
I smell an Emmy…or a B-Emmy…
40 percent? Whataya mean our ratings are down 30 percent? They can’t be down 20 percent???
Wow! Does this mean that I…zzyzx will never ever be able to make it onto Ricks List? The list you don’t want to be on..which it looks like you’re on now. Nor does it look (now) like anyone else here at IMAO will ever be able to make the list. What a total bummer for all of us. I guess this only leaves us with Keith Olbermann’s coveted ‘Most Horrible Person in the World Award.’ Which I must admit I’d rather be awarded anyway ’cause it comes complete with organ music and a wadded up piece of paper. Also I have a question for you Rick. If it’s true that Jews control the media then doesn’t it make sense to not denigrate Jews on the air? Because if you do might they not get together and fire your a$$? And lastly…does this mean we won’t be seeing you at the coming big prog rally in Washington DC? I was so looking forward to seeing ‘viva la raza’ spray painted on the Washington Monument. Maybe we’ll see ya over at MSNBC.
I just heard on the radio that Rick Sanchez got fired. What about the First Amendment???!!!!! Gigantic Zionist conspiracy obviously. First Helen Thomas for no reason just when her career was starting to blossom (or was it her nose?) Then that mid-eastern CNN newreader who just tweeted on her own time that she thought that dead terrorist guy was A Gift to Womynkind. Now arguably the greatest newsman of our generation is gone. And for what? Why didn’t Walter Cronkite get fired when he said the Jews were behind the North Vietnamese and since they had all the money, we’d never win the war? Oh, I forgot, the Jews hadn’t invented CNN yet.
To keep their control of the media secret, the Jews are firing all of their reporters and getting rid of all of their viewers. The evil plan is nearing completion.
Live from the Catskill resorts, it’s CNN!
What, a person can’t have a biased opinion?
“Lawrence Harvey Zeiger wouldn’t have changed his name to Larry King.
(Zieger’s a fine name. Why change it? What, you’re not proud of it?)”
Same with Tony Curtis. What’s wrong with Bernard Schwartz?
And stupid me! I didn’t know Paul Newman was a Jooooo, and I didn’t know Rick was a CuuuBan. I just thought he was like one of those guys that hang out by the HomeDepot. You know, the guys that mow your lawn.
being jewish I find this funny, but you give us too much credit… only 3 opinions.
Didn’t you used to be funny? 🙂