The WaPo once gave Obama four Pinocchios. It was for the statement, “I’m only human.”

Come on, guys, we used to be warmongers. When the president said he wanted to bomb a country, we’d nod and wouldn’t even ask which.

Obama is playing a genius long game – something that will be obvious to archaeologists who dig up our bones thousands of years form now.

BUSH: “I want to bomb Syria.”
US: “Why?”
BUSH: “It’s in the Middle East.”
US: “Sounds reasonable.”

If only Obama had the persuasion abilities of Dubya.

If there was a video game for being president, convincing Republicans to blow people up in the Middle East would be the tutorial mission.

Free hugs! Just fill out this hug form, mail it in, and wait 6-8 weeks for your hug voucher to arrive.

You just assumed Obama would be a good wartime president with his background in community organizing and his brief internship in the Senate.

Step on a crack, break your mother’s back. Step on a line, break your father’s spine. Be OCD, die sad and lonely.

Stop changing my account number, guys who want me to pay them bills.

The thing that’s bothering me with the new Robocop is that he looks more like a guy in a suit – Iron Man – than a half man,half robot.

Reading Casino Royale. I like how Bond surmises a thug’s simple-minded violent nature probably came form marijuana abuse.

I’d believe in global warming if one of the scientific models for it had predicted Ben Affleck being cast as Batman.

I hit my daughter with a stick anytime she uses her imagination. Using imagination is bad, right? I probably should read a parenting book…