Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…
…smaller venues, so that the now-standing-room-only “crowds” are packed so tightly that no one can fall over…I’m seeing walk-in closets and narrow hallways here based on his current popularity.
…have OFA hire a better class of actors, ones that won’t ham it up as much.
…anyone who faints gets an appointment with the death panel for final disposition.
…free contraceptives.
…something about a red line….
…is to try to be even more perfectly clearer.
… a no fainting mandate, punishable by a penalty to be administered by the IRS.
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…
get that approval rating to zero… no more audience members to faint.
Pass a law where OSHA requires everyone that attends an Obama speech to wear harnesses that are tethered to the ceiling with bungee cords.
A splendid time is guaranteed for all!
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…
putting all members to sleep by a warm up speech by Joe Biden.
… fund a research grant to a team of scientists to determine that it’s related to global warming.
…apply a large tongue depressor… to your tongue.
…hire more Background Lab Coat Workers!
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution… is to mandate that everyone faints.
…Is to grant those who faint Obamacare Vouchers.
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…more cowbell.
Something Something racism….uuhhh…perfectly clear….mmmm….microaggression will not be tolerated….uummm…you know what? I’m late for my tee time.
even more free stuff as a distraction
…brush his teeth before every speech. His dog breath* can be really overwhelming. (*because he ate a dog)
…advising to relax and think of France.
…tax snoring.
…search harder for an audience of sheep, the fainting goat stand-ins never applaud at the right times anyhow.
…tell his staff less pistol whipping, more kidney punches when asking for campaign cash.
…quit letting slip with a truth now and then.
…get Michelle to put boob belt on at home so the oxygen doesn’t get sucked out of that room.
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution, sign them up for SSDI, EBT, SNAP, WIC TANF, ABC. XYZ, PDQ, WTF, STFU, ASAP !
… remains unclear. If he can’t stop Russian feints, Syrian feints, or Iranian feints, how is he supposed to stop American ones?
Biggest problem during Obama speeches – fainting audience members. Obama’s solution…
… is a mandatory broomstick up the wazoo just like his.
… requiring the audience to bring their own canes. When they feel light headed, just stick the crook up their butt and instant tripod.
…spending more time eating waffles.
…demanding RSPECT from the rabble.
Fainting goats! They get more laughs.
…having Joe Biden wander through the crowdasking,”pull my finger”.
…quit mentioning actual out of pocket costs of Obamacare.
…stop making audience leave bladders larger than 6 ounces at home.
…fire everybody that can’t think of a better euphemism for the knock out game than “White people fainting”.
…Zamboni the row of seats Michelle is sitting in before she sits down.
…remember, Obama zombies and Daryl Dixon don’t mix.
… go through the pockets of anyone who faints and call it a tax.
… He’ll declare a new rule stating that all health insurance policies need to include fainting couches.