Archive of entries posted on 5th March 2014

Link of the Day: The 8 Types of Star Wars Fans

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(Submitted by Anonymiss of Nuking Politics via Dorkly [High Praise!])

[Caution: Contains one bad word]

The 8 Types of Star Wars Fans

Personally, I don’t think type #6 actually exists.

And, for the record, I’m a type #2.

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Wisdom of the Day: Bruises Rejected Thoughtful Cusack

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Obama Warned Us – Rise From Poverty

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America’s prosperity must rest upon the broad shoulders of a rising middle class. We know that America thrives when every person can find independence and pride in their work; when the wages of honest labor liberate families from the brink of hardship. We are true to our creed when a little girl born into the bleakest poverty knows that she has the same chance to succeed as anybody else, because she is an American; she is free, and she is equal, not just in the eyes of God but also in our own.

BARACK OBAMA, Inaugural Address, Jan. 21, 2013

“And if the little girl’s name is Julia, she can get a lifetime supply of government goodies if she agrees to give up the ‘free’ part.”

Voting for Obama proved that

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GodzillaFacepalmSome Website called VoucherCloud did a study recently, and it showed Americans don’t know stuff.

Now, I didn’t need some coupon-aggregator Website to do a study to tell me that. I’ve met a lot of Americans. Related to several. Am one. I know Americans, and I know a lot of them are stupid. There’s no other reason than stupid that explains how Obama got elected. And that the stupid is a long-term condition is proven by Obama getting elected twice.

Okay, back to the study. It seems that 11% of Americans think HTML is a sexually transmitted disease. And, the study showed some other things, too:

  • 27% identified “gigabyte” as an insect commonly found in South America. A gigabyte is a measurement unit for the storage capacity of an electronic device.
  • 42% said they believed a “motherboard” was “the deck of a cruise ship.” A motherboard is usually a circuit board that holds many of the key components of a computer.
  • 23% thought an “MP3” was a “Star Wars” robot. It is actually an audio file.
  • 18% identified “Blu-ray” as a marine animal. It is a disc format typically used to store high-definition videos.
  • 15% said they believed “software” is comfortable clothing. Software is a general term for computer programs.

Yes, I sit here and laugh. But, is it really a laughing matter? Shouldn’t we try to help these poor people?

No. We need to laugh at them. Just like when you see a car with an Obama sticker, you point and laugh.

Random Thoughts: Side of History, Rights, and Alan Grayson

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Let’s not focus on who is on the right or wrong side of history; at the end of the day, we all get participation trophies.

I knew if I just kept wearing dull, uninspired clothes, eventually I’d be trendy. #Normcore

“If you really like something and think you need it, you have a right to it.” -too many people

All I ask is that voting taking at least a marginal amount of effort so as to disenfranchise the exceptionally lazy.

The Democrats should do their own version of Scooby Doo where when they pull the mask off the monster, it’s always the Koch brothers.

“Old man Koch was scaring people away from government reliance!”
“Would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling Dems!”

Do you think Hillary is going to run on how she’d tried to stop the Russian with a fake, plastic button?

Has the left considered sitting around in front of banks and yelling to no particular purpose?

Haven’t seen any of True Detective. Can’t get over how generic-sounding the name is.

“Booooosh!!! I mean… Kooooooch!”

So, does anyone have an idea what this is about? Because, sorry, no, it’s not real.

So what indication was there that Alan Grayson is an unstable nutbag other than everything?

I’d like to watch some HBO shows, but I’m not willing to pay $100 a month for it and get a cable subscription again.

“Alan Grayson, when did you stop beating your wife?”
“Trick question! I never stopped beating her!”

Don’t put the door to your safe room right next to the door of your unsafe room because you can mix those up in a panic.