(Submitted by Anonymiss of Nuking Politics [High Praise!])
Archive of entries posted on 1st August 2014
Professional
In Idaho, a pilot attempting to drop 3,000 ping-pong balls on a fair, missed and dropped them on an interstate, instead.
Let me guess: he used to work IT for HealthCare.Gov?
Ready for Hillary
Link of the Day: Star Wars – Imperial Propaganda Posters
[High Praise! to io9]
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Wisdom of the Day: Bus Sharknado Superman Bieber Rockets
To the girl crying on this bus:
Stop. If it were ok to cry on the bus, we'd all be doing it.
— shut up, mike (@shutupmikeginn) July 29, 2014
I really hope Sharknado 2 doesn't fall prey to the sequel curse.
— Jonah Goldberg (@JonahNRO) July 30, 2014
"man superman is a nerd"
[Superman stands up]
NUH UH
[puts on eyeglasses]
ya what he said
[puts on sunglasses]
ya what superman & Clark said
— EJ Gomez (@EJGomez) July 30, 2014
I would be so excited to take a swing at Bieber, I'd probably miss too. #TeamOrlando
— Charly J. (@chuck_dizzle) July 31, 2014
Hamas rockets are landing in Gaza? Those poor people can't even afford enough fuel. 🙁
— Anthonado Bialy (@AnthonyBialy) July 31, 2014
Boot Stamping on a Human Face Forever
The EPA’s Gina McCarthy said the EPA “protects public health and the environment – how can you not like it?”
They declared your farm a protected wetland because it has a mud puddle – what’s not to like?
Obama Warned Us – One
“We fall and we rise as one nation — as one people.” —President Obama #OpportunityForAll
@BarackObama
“Ein Volk, ein Reich, etc”
And Yet Still the Universal Punchline
In Los Angeles, a pregnant woman was unable to cross the road to get to a hospital because President Obama’s motorcade was passing through.
Apparently Obama is the exact opposite of a chicken joke.
Straight Line of the Day: A Tennesse Restaurant Posted “Guns Welcome” Signs and Increased Business. The Restaurant Should Be Named…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
A Tennessee restaurant posted “guns welcome” signs and increased business. The restaurant should be named…
Not Following the Logic
Democrat Congressman Luis Gutierrez said that children surrendering themselves to the Border Patrol proves “the border is secure”.
Which is like saying having water in your bailing bucket proves your boat stopped leaking.