The Happy Dance Committee has submitted this FAQ on the status of the happy dance:
HAPPY DANCE FAQ
Q. Will there be a happy dance?
A. Yes. A happy dance was promised, and thus a happy dance will be coming.
Q. When will there be the happy dance?
A. No official date has ever been discussed. The official stance on when the happy dance is coming is “soon.”
Q. Is there any limit until how long we might have to wait for the happy dance?
A. To fulfill the promise, the happy dance must be filmed before Frank J. dies.
Q. If Frank J. dies before doing the happy dance, will he have to answer to God for his broken promise?
A. Yes. He’ll have to answer for that and his Tobit posts.
Q. I thought the Tobit posts were funny.
A. Then please pray to God to that effect on behalf of Frank J.’s immortal soul.
Frank – You must stop this. You are making me feel like a democrat. Cheated.
This reminds me of when they remodelled out school. “When will it be done,” we asked. “Monday,” they answered, “Which Monday we aren’t sure, but it’ll be done by A monday.”
Heh
I don’t think you need to worry about your Tobit posts, I believe God has a sense of humor-about some things.
For God so loved the world, He did not send a committee.
The happy dance is doomed!
The funny, however, is not. 😉
Okay, nobody post any comment other than “DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!” from now until the time Frank does the Happy Dance.
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
I don’t care if you publish your happy dance. Of course being a man myself….
Now if SarahK would care to join in, it would hold more interest for me. No disrespect to SarahK on any level intended, but compliments a-plenty, of a non-romantic nature, concerning her level of attractiveness.
The main point is that I’ve been doing the happy dance myself since Nov 3, and have not the slightest clue when I will stop. I imagine when I stop the happy dance, it will simply morph into the Good Foot dance perfected by James Brown in 1966.
We all know that all intelligent people everywhere are doing the happy dance regardless do we not?
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
The official stance is usually “When it’s ready”. You should begin by releasing a lot of alphas, two or three betas, a half dozen RC and finally “Happy Dance 1.0 – Now with 20% less calories”.
The very nature of a Happy Dance requires that the dancer himself be actually happy at the time of the performance.
If you’re like most people, Frank, even a high like the re-election of the Cowboy passes with time. Thus, a Happy Dance delayed becomes… an Obligation Dance.
And where’s the fun in that?
Every time someone mentions Daschle being ousted, I start to Happy Dance. Still. Ah, bliss.
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
Dear God,
This is on behalf of Frank J’s immortal soul…
C’mon, you know the Tobit stuff is funny! Don’t give me that “Do I look like I am smiling?” stuff. You are quite the practical joker yourself, you know. Let’s go to the tape…
1. You invented the Platypus
2. You made farts stink when they could just as easily have been pleasant, but that would never have been funny.
3. You invented Democrats.
4. Nipples on men?
5. You wrote one book that we turned into a thousand different religions…c’mon, that’s funny!
6. What you did to the French is hillarious! How do they stand up without a backbone anyway?
7. You gave Moses STONE tablets! He was an old man for crying out loud! You must have been rolling seeing him try and get those down the mountain. I mean, you couldn’t give him papyrus paper or something? Prankster!
8. “Jesus Christ Superstar”. I know you had something to do with that.
9. Father Guido Sarduchi!
10. Those baboons with giant pink asses? What was that all about?
Anyway, as you can see, you are a funny guy, Frank is a funny guy. So please don’t go and fry him for all eternity or anything.
Now, if when he gets there, you want to answer the door looking like John Lovitz dressed up as satan, just to see the look on his face, that would be funny!
Sincerely,
Chri…uh…John Kerry. I served in Vietnam!
you risk losing me as a reader if you dont put up the dance NOW
All talk and no action, you’re a regular Kerry.
I am hereby protesting IMAO due to the lack of happy dancing! Now I’m growing less and less coherent…
DANCE HAPPY LOVE NOW! NEED DANCY HAPP NOW! DANCEY DANCEY HAPPY LOVE!
DANCE OR THE CHANTING CONTINUES!
OK, we need to have something which will make Frank so happy that he will do the Happy Dance now. Hmmmm…
1) All the LLLs could have a conversion en masse and bow at Frank’s feet in submission…
2) All evil monkeys could be rounded up and shot…
3) All evil Ninjas would be defeated by Frank with much gore and bloodshed, because he discovered the Holy Grail of Ninja Slaying(tm)
…. How am I doing? Any other suggestions?
DANCE! HAPPY DANCE NOW!
(laughing silly)
R’cat
I am crushed by not having the happy dance as expected! It’s not FAIR. It was rigged! This is so STUPID! I am so crushed that I (whisper) am seeing a professional. I am so dissapointed I may have to move to Canada, where at least SOME of the speak French (sort of). I shall live next to Alec Baldwin and Babs too. If I DON”T GET MY HAPPY DANCE I WILL HOLD MY BREATH!!!!
(fold arms and stamp foot)
writes on handy notepad
STILL HOLDING MY BREATH
CHEEKS BULGING, FACE TURNING COLORS
would a Duke Nukem Forever comment be too harsh and geeky to apply here?
maybe I should stick to slashdot….
Futility
EYES ROLL BACK, KNEES BUCKLE, EXPELL FETID BREATH IN GIANT WHOOSH, SPLIT SCALP OPEN ON CORNER OF TABLE ON THE WAY TO BEING A GROANING, BLEEDING HEAP ON THE CARPET.
then I vomit
A good happy dance would make me feel infinitely better right about now….
“The peasants are in arms, Sire! The demand the sacred rite of the Happy Dance!”
Frank: “Pff. Whatever. EEEK! That peasant has a board with a nail in it!!!”
“Fail to dance happily will ya? I’ll show you! Get back here and dance!!!”
Frank: “That board with a nail in it may have defeated me, but the peasants won’t stop there. They’ll make bigger boards and bigger nails, and soon, they will make a board with a nail so big, it will destroy them all! WAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
So Dance. Do the Happy Dance NOW.
<THREAT>
If you don’t happy dance immediately, I’m make it so you aren’t happy anymore and no longer capable of dancing.
</THREAT>
Hey now, I am a member of the committee, and no one involved me in the making of this so-called FAQ.
I demand non-partisan investigation by a special prosecutor into the allegations put forth herein.
And as a committee member, I can only say that I have the utmost faith in our system for getting to the bottom of this, and putting this whole dark ordeal behind us, so that we can all happy dance together to start a new day with a new tone, free of partisan bickering.
It’s too late. This failure to produce the promised “happy dance” has already become a byword and a proverb in the blogosphere:
Worse than Frank J and his “Happy Dance”
Other bywords rumored to have been overheard:
“Better late than Frank J”
“A bird in the hand is better than Frank J’s happy dance”
“Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never danced the happy dance”
“A happy dance deferred is justice denied”
“Quoth the Raven, ‘Frank J!'”
“A happy dance in time saves nine”
“Don’t put off until tomorrow the happy dance that can be danced today”
“Frank J Nukem Forever”
And so many more…
Now look what you’ve done,Frank.The people have not been heard,and now revolution is appearing on the horizon.
Now,you brush up on the Macarena,and we’ll supply the go-go cage,nipple tassels and flaming batons. Dance,purty boy! Dance! heh heh
R.L. Hunter,
Uh “copy-and-paste”????
Anyway, there is more to do you’re happy dance about today, Frank. The WaPo has dropped………
…… Ted Rall.
Now, you must create a new cartoon to depict the WaPo giving Rall the boot. Where you depict them giving him the boot is up to you.
Your failure to happy dance is most dishonorable, Frank. Only yubizume can restore your honor now.
If you don’t know by NOW, let me tell you.
The MAN has until Inauguration Day to Happy Dance.
No one, and I mean NO ONE, will stop ME then.
W Inauguration day Jan. 2001 was a special day. I drove 45 min. to drink champagne with an old friend as the OATH was taken. I’ll do it again. The wait is worth it. Stick around.
Semper Fi.
Frankj – You Da Man!
To twist the words of Napoleon:
“If you are going to do the happy dance, then do the happy dance.”
Frank, I find your work amusing, and I look forward to it every day. It is disappointing to realize that you’re not actively trying to keep your promise.
I would have more respect if you came out and stated that you don’t want to do it. That way, we can be mad at you, and then get over it.
As self-appointed Happy Dance Committee member I issue the following statement proving that Frank J. is taking all of our happy dance needs under serious consideration.
http://tinypic.com/mkdhu
hehe
TEXT FOR LINK GOES HERE
oops.
Bah, copy and paste amongst yourselves. I give up.
Happy Dance Committee Statement
Right after this one.
whoa, so that’s what happens when i’m working at 7:30 and tired. i almost typed my password to my computer in my URL slot.
anyway, heh.
i’ve seen it.
it’s a beauty.
and well worth the wait.
Wait….
SarahK has seen it?
Wait a minute! That’s, that’s prejudice! That’s bias! That’s UNFAIR to the rest of us! We want our Happy Dance NOW!!!! Waaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
(So did the LLL whine come out right?)
I think SarahK has seen it… in person
…”In person?” OK, where’s the ACLU when you really need them???
SarahK, will you need assistance prosecuting your case?
(snerk) G-d, I love this blog!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
(In tribute to Beo, and RL Hunter who has painful, probably festering blisters on his fingers.)
FrankJ, this delay is cruel. Its…its…almost MONKEY-like in its cruelty.
SarahK has seen it in person in Frank’s livingroom.
but hey, it’s totally fair. i had to go to the Grand Canyon with him and listen to him repeat “let’s cuddle for warmth” over and over. that alone deserves a happy dance. 🙂
hmm. i wonder if he’ll let me film it for him when i’m there at thanksgiving.
What do you mean “if” he’ll let you? Frank is a man of strong will and mind,but he’s still a man.The greatest men in the history of this G-dly Earth,have all had the same Achilles Heel…women.And usually,just one woman is all it took.
However,by the odd chance Frank possesses some magical moo goo gai pan kung fu powers,or some such strength,one can always resort to asking a local country station to play ‘I Hope You Dance’,by Leanne Womack,and shame him into it. heh heh 😉
Chris made me laugh.
Actually, all of you did.
Frank, save the happy dance until inauguration day. It will be splendid.
(thinks he did the happy dance cause he was happy to see sarahk again)
Frank,
You should just say that you will do the happy dance when CBS releases the results of their “internal investigation” (or did they say eternal investigation)into Rather and Mapes. That way you might never have to do it.
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
I find it unfair that Frank J. let SarahK see the happy dance and not me! AND THE PROTEST CONTINUES!!!
Look, my friend tells me that I need to see Nuke the Moon, and then I realize you have been hacking into my brain..
Get out of my head.
Thanks!
Can we dance now?
P
Frank actually DID vote for the Happy Dance…..before he voted against it!
DANCE DANGIT!!
And actually, we do not have a promise for the Happy Dance for Inauguration Day:
Therefore, the ubiquitous question: What is the meaning of “is”…. no, I mean, What is the meaning of “soon.”
Sorry. NOT! LOL
I have come to the conclusion that Frank J might be a closet democrat… continued promises followed closely by NO substantive action. The next thing you know, he will promise to fix Social Security, or the Health Care system–.
Hmmmmm––..
“When will then become now?”
“SOON.“
“even a high like the re-election of the Cowboy passes with time”
Who let him in here? Since WHEN?!?
DANCE! DO THE HAPPY DANCE NOW!
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DANCE!(ow my fingers!) DO(ow)THE HAPPY (ow ow ow)DANCE NOW! OOOOHHH that smarts
Yes, but remember, “there is NO CONTROLLING LEGAL AUTHORITY!”
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