You Call That a Plan?

(A Precision Guided Humor Assignment)
Some high-up Al-Qaeda nutjob wrote a letter to his superior Al-Qaeda nutjob proposing a “plan” for the future of Islamofascism:

The first stage: Expel the Americans from Iraq.
The second stage: Establish an Islamic authority or amirate, then develop it and support it until it achieves the level of a caliphate- over as much territory as you can[…]

Which – in terms of practicality – greatly resembles the Underpants Gnomes plan:
1) Collect underpants
2) ???
3) Profit!
or in this case:
1) Get blown up by Americans
2) ???
3) Establish Caliphate!
It’s a good start, but maybe they should consider streamlining it a bit:
1) Get blown up by Americans
2) Die
MUCH better.
SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS!

5 Comments

  1. I have a plan for these terrorists!
    1) Embrace EMO
    2) Start live journal giving hourly updates on your current mood
    3) Learn new vocabulary containing such powerful words as “n00b” and “suxx0rz” and calling your enemies “ghey!” that’s better than bombs
    4) Shop at Hot Topic
    5) Spend your time not updating your livejournal crying in the dark why the fat chick at starbucks doesn’t dig your black nail polish
    6) Become oblivious to freedom taking Iraq over… then tell your “friends” you really don’t like the freedom and you want to go to business school and f*** things up “from the inside!”
    It worked for some kids in my high school a “few” years ago

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.