LeapFrog has a new ‘Color The Democrats’ Coloring Book for his LeapPad. He’s already colored Barney Frank pink, Barack Obama partly black, and Elizabeth Warren 1/32 red.
Government Science! grants have led to the discovery of chewing gum that allows him to walk and chew gum. But not necessarily in that order. At the same time.
Obama had his Sunday bath and they fixed his teleprompter, making him both clean and articulate once again.
Campaign donations are down but Democrats are offering a buy one, get one free vote sale.
……he can officially change his name to Hillary, put on a dress and have Obama’s son (who will look…….no I don’t think even I bitter clinger that I am can go there).
…instead of having to campaign with the President, Obama says he should stay in D.C. and spend more time with his family.
according to latest Gallup poll, he is soon to be funemployed!
…after three attempts, he finally cracked a core of 70 on his IQ test.
…the glue on his hair piece finally let go so he can wash his ugly, bald head.
The White House dining staff will finally let him take the cork off his fork.
…his hair plugs have finally stopped rejecting HIM.
…the White House kitchen staff have finally agreed to let him take the cork off his fork.
The rainbow pinwheel he ordered is no longer on back order.
LeapFrog has a new ‘Color The Democrats’ Coloring Book for his LeapPad. He’s already colored Barney Frank pink, Barack Obama partly black, and Elizabeth Warren 1/32 red.
…he won his case and will finally receive royalties for the movie he claimed was based on his autobiography: I am Sam.
..he finally saved enough boxtops for the solar-powered whirlygig beanie.
Government Science! grants have led to the discovery of chewing gum that allows him to walk and chew gum. But not necessarily in that order. At the same time.
Obama had his Sunday bath and they fixed his teleprompter, making him both clean and articulate once again.
Campaign donations are down but Democrats are offering a buy one, get one free vote sale.
…at the next fund raiser, they’re gonna let him sit at the big boy table.
Depends now has the XXXL size.
…his Rainbow Bright doll arrived.
…that gum that he likes is going to come back in style.
He will be called “His Superfluous Majesty!” like VPs of olde, for life.
…the bank approved the loan for the rabbit farm he co-signed with George.
Of course everyone else in the world sees it as bad news. Joe loves his little rose colored world.
…they’re taking the training wheels off his limo.
…he didn’t say anything stupid yesterday!
…his doctor will be able to get the marble out of Joe’s nose.
…Mac ‘n Cheese for dinner!
…being accused of masticating didn’t mean what he thought it meant.
…by Senate rules, Harry Reid has to let him cut in line in the cafeteria.
… they found a supply of Mr. Bubbles.
… barry is out of town, so he gets to keep his lunch money.
… they are going to let him go the the potty all by himself.
… they found the dog, barry didn’t eat him, he just ran away.
……he can officially change his name to Hillary, put on a dress and have Obama’s son (who will look…….no I don’t think even I bitter clinger that I am can go there).
…according to Section 11384, Subsection 234B(c), hair weaves will be covered by Obamacare!
…. but he screwed it up.
…but he couldn’t read it.
the wuzzles are coming to town! YAY!
It turns out that they found Lightning McQueen! So the special task force he leads can wind down now.
Free pancakes at IHOP! Yea!
…a recent ABC/Newsweek poll found that 65% of the American public didn’t know who the Vice-President was.
68% of likely voters approve of him being the 2016 Presidential Nominee for the Democratic Party, including a whopping 97% of Republicans.
…those damn kids finally got off his lawn.
J is no longer considered a letter, so J-O-B-S is finally a three letter word!
…the Delaware undertaker’s union voted him the next “shovel-ready job” making Joe one in a row for the Administration!
…Barry said he could pursue his hobbies of stoat and vole breeding just as long as he kept it to the area around Moochelle’s vegetable garden.
……Obama got a bulletproof vest so he can finally retire.
…but the Secret Service wouldn’t let him open it.
Doctor’s are optimistic that they will be able to remove his head from the sand.
…it’s not that the tinfoil stopped working, it’s just that the mothership hasn’t been transmitting for the past week. So, no worries.
… the name of his donor has been found. Abby… something.
Normal, Abby Normal.
he’s been voted MORE useless than a bucket of warm p–s
… There won’t be a conflict of interest investigation of how he kept funneling tax money to his son’s company when he was a Senator.
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