Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Surprising news from the latest UN climate conference…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Surprising news from the latest UN climate conference…
…: attendees are running short of hooker and blow.
… They still don’t know the difference between “climate” and “weather”. (Oh wait, this is supposed to be “surprising” news…)
… Michael Moore still has his own weather patterns.
…: a battle broke out over control of the conference room thermostat. Half of the attendee say it’s too warm – the other half say it’s too cold.
Surprising News from the Latest UN Climate Conference…”
… the vote to retroactively censure the iceberg that the Titanic hit.
… delegate confusion because the UN Primate Conference was in an adjoining ballroom.
…: the attendees of the Lima conference have been declared to be “full of beans”.
…:a “working group” has suggested renewing virgin sacrifices to appease Gaia.
…: Al Gore was seen doing Jello shots from the belly button of a nubile waitress, screaming “I can feel the heat now – Woooooo!”
…: warring factions were seen beating one another with hockey sticks.
…algore is comprised of 85% of Earth’s greenhouse gasses, up 4% from yesterday.
…they realized that they had been working on the unclimate model all these years and let out a collective D’oh.
…punching your inner hippie releases far more greenhouse gasses than punching a real hippie and increases your chances of living as lavishly as UN bureaucrats.
… a new door prize of a 10 MPG Hummer has been added.
… the next meeting has been delayed by a week due to 3 feet of unexpected “global warming” that fell over the city.
… there was almost a full-scale brawl over arguments about which competing climate model would be the next to be appointed the correct one. Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed and pointed out that the uncertainty just meant more grants for everybody, so the source of embezzlement would remain unsullied.
Surprising news from the latest UN climate conference…
was just a photocopy of the news from the previous conference.
as they came out against campus rape, getting their liberal shibboleths confused.
they found that UN Climate conferences are also affected by changing climate.
Next year’s conference will be held in Hawaii! Yay!
Al Gore predicted many years ago that climate change would cause sex crimes, in his multi-part series “Fat Albert and the Cosby Kiss.”
… is their newest program, “Crap and Trade.” You don’t wanna know.
The developed countries will be assessed eleventy trillion dollars to support the attendees’ ecochamber (sic); a/k/a the buy-o-sphere.
A major problem seems to be those DamnCat 5 hurricanes and DamnCat 5 tornadoes.
…Al Gore finally had to stop speaking… he ran out of hot air.
A little gold furry guy standing on a stump introduced himself as “I am Al Gorax, I speak for the trees.”
… was the discovery of a whole new type of storm cloud, attributed to Republicans: the cromulo-nimbys.
…: when the moderator tried to acknowledge the Nobel laureates in attendance, he kept having to say, “No, Dr. Mann, please sit down!”
…: the conference voted overwhelmingly to file an amicus brief on behalf of Mark Steyn in the DC Circuit case against Michael Mann.
@19 Bob B (a): I see what you did there . . .
…hockey sticks are out, police batons are in!! “Batons up! Don’t pollute!”
…the UN really is an international crime syndicate and have been warming Earth in another attempt to kill James Bond.
…Obama has agreed the US will pay another billion trillion dollars because our obese kids are causing the planet to sink closer to the Sun.
…UVa frat brothers have been raping the rain forests and not bothering with the rubber trees.
…Jonathon Gruber turned down a position as spokesman saying, “No one is that stupid”.
…when the paste on label of the IPCC committee peeled back and the SPECTRE logo was seen underneath.
…Barry, the Republican, was not invited.
. . . scientists from the Antarctic weather station were appointed to the committee on Sub-Saharan climate change.
. . . the initiative to tax migratory birds flying south was defeated by votes of the northern bloc countries.
. . . Democratic observers from Washington were surprised to learn that hell still hasn’t frozen over despite massive losses in November.
…Lena Dunham said she was molested by Bill Cosby there, after waving around a toy pistol and stealing a box of Swisher-Sweets
. . . is that Al Gore appeared but it didn’t snow.
. . . is that Michael Mann wowed the conference with his disco versions of “It Might as Well Rain Until September” and “Winter Wonderland”.
…Greenpeace was given the concession contract for all graffiti.
http://io9.com/this-greenpeace-stunt-may-have-irreparably-damaged-peru-1669728616
…when the UN gives the bird to the world, it will be a Condor.
http://youtu.be/M_gSydN_BYM
Get over that old out. Baby, it’s cold outside.
Surprising News from the Latest UN Climate Conference…”
… Heidi Fleiss was guest lecturer during the segment explaining the song “It’s Raining Men.”
A whole day of events happened without one condemnation of Israel.
… the amount of hot air generated by the conference had absolutely no effect on the climate.
… Suggestions that they schedule their next conference on what will be the sparkling tropical beaches of Alaska was rejected in favor of the attendees nobly sacrificing their own comfort by planning a conference where it will, no doubt, be a scorched and barren wasteland (But is currently an expensive resort.)
…using the same scientific models it has been determined that Boutros Boutros-Ghali produces one third the Co2 limit to say his name as it should and he will be hunted down and shot. (If they can muster a force capable of doing it.)
…Obama’s plan to print enough dollars to make the whole planet green and reverse global warming is working so well that many African countries are burning them to keep warm.
Surprising news from the latest UN climate conference…
…we must spend trillions of dollars fighting another killer, “Dihydrogen Monoxide”
…is that after they moved the UN to the equator, they declared the war on climate change won.
…only the USA is crippling its citizens and businesses with taxes and regulations. (Oh, you said, “surprising news”. Never mind)