Thanks for all the advice on how to train my kitten Sydney. I’ve decided the best way is to always smoke a cigar, and, if she does something bad, I press the lit end against her head. This way, she associates bad things with pain and also learns to fear tobacco so she won’t pick up smoking when she is older. SarahK is constantly complaining about me smoking cigars indoors, though, to which I say, “I guess you just want us to have unruly cats.” Then I blow smoke in her face.
I’m in the middle of working on my book, but I still need a good resource to make a timeline of what were the headlines up until my first In My World™ (October, 2002). Then I can figure how many new ones to add so the book will reasonably cover all of Bush’s first four years. If someone can point me to a resource, like something that will show me the headline for any particular date, that would be totally hitler.
As usual, Frank, try the evil Wikipedia. (link to major headlines for 2002, by month)
Use them now, crush them later. >:)
How about old newspapers at the library? Every one of ’em has a headline, even a blurb.
Maybe you can find something online that will cut to the chase, but life is a journey. You might have to walk.
I know the library solution; there has to be something online that’s equivalent to the million year old technology of microfilm.
http://www.drudgereportarchives.com/dsp/timeline_html.htm
There’s always Matt Drudge’s archives. They seem to only go back to Nov. 2001 however.
As long as that’s all you do with those cigars…
btw- the best way to teach your cat not to use her claws on the furniture is to keep a squirt gun handy that produces a good 8-10 foot stream and let her have it when she is clawing something worthwhile, then let her claw things like a throw rug from the dollar store without the water injection treatment. In about a few days, she will be able to recognize ‘claw here bad, claw there good’.
Plus it’s fun to squirt em.
But don’t get your cat declawed, becuase it’s mutilation (removing down to the first knuckle), and because I will call you a big wuss.
I would go with Wikipedia, too. It’s not evil if you twist it to your own, pure motives.
Here is a page that might lead to what you are looking for.
Have you tried putting some hydrochloric acid in a spray bottle. that might work. Plus it would be fun to zap your neighbors when they’re not looking. Now THAT would be totaly hitler.
Frank please make it a priority to aim your laser at Boulder as one of the first places. We all know now that hate filled lefty works for CU now.
Wow that was horrible grammar. I should proof read befor I send.
Pfft. He’s not even just hate filled lefty. He’s a hate filled lefty lunatic who should die. Sorry–that was mean. But still, he’s an absolute loon. I feel sad to live in the same state as he does. I feel sad to live in the same universe.
I’m a CU alumni…I’m so ashamed.
Try the Facts on File World News Digest, which is held by the Brevard County Public Library system. You might wish to first call ahead and see if they keep issues back that far. The online catalog says that the Central Brevard and Merritt Island branches retain this periodical.
You know what’s fun? Squish kitty down on a smooth linoleum floor, so her legs are splayed out. Spin her around and around and around as fast as you can.
Then, let her up and watch the hilarity ensue.
Hey Frank, check it out:
http://web.archive.org/web/*/http://cnn.com.
Do I get a free book? 🙂
Perlwizard
Poor little kitty! You’re a sick little man Frank. And that’s why I keep coming back.
Enjoy the cigars now Frank….
You know what’s good for that? CUBAN cigars. Sure, they’re evil and tyrannical – but they know their cigars.
Disclaimer. RWD does not condone the use of illegal substances. He does condone cruel treatment to cats as they are not real pets.
Howzabout:
http://timelines.ws/21stcent/21st.HTML
And for 2000, I guess you’ll want:
http://timelines.ws/20thcent/TWENTIETHCENT.HTML
as well.
Isn’t that how Bill trained Monica?
“And a woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.” Kipling
“How anyone can not smoke-it deprives a man of the best part of life . with a good cigar in his mouth a man is perfectly safe, nothing can touch him-literally.” Mann