Secret Garden of Lies
Guess what the lying liars at the White House are doing again.
No, not playing Mario Kart. That was a stupid guess. You’re stupid.
They’re lying!
An episode of the Iron Chef on the Food Network claimed it was using vegetables from the White House garden, but it was all lies.
Why won’t the White House tell the truth to the American people? Probably because the truth is they’re liars, and you can’t tell the truth about being a liar because then you’d be a truth-teller making it a lie to say you’re a liar… so it’s like a paradox.
Anyway, Michelle Obama says the reason they didn’t use the actual vegetables from the White House garden is that fat kids snuck in and ate them all. I don’t buy that, though; fat kids don’t eat vegetables. I think the White House garden is all really plastic plants and Michelle Obama just goes out there to drink a watering pail full of Vodka.
(22 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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February 11th, 2010 at 1:44 pm
Oh my God! It’s Vegetablegate!
February 11th, 2010 at 2:21 pm
Easy on Michelle Frank. This the first time in her life that she is proud of her garden (even though it’s her first garden). And the real reason they didn’t use her vegetables is that White House worms got to them. The worms are all over the damn place.
February 11th, 2010 at 2:21 pm
Once I lied about eating my vegetables.
February 11th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
I guess the Obamas do not want the public to see what they are REALLY growing in that garden. The DEA watches Food Channel, too.
Or it could be those pod people pods. That explains alot.
February 11th, 2010 at 3:19 pm
vegetables, well what did they do with the wheel-chairs? Old cannibal joke.
February 11th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
How much longer until front loaders are no longer needed to open my driveway and I can listen to the birdies sing while I plant my sunflowers? Not even Obama can ruin the peace of gardening. He and Michelle are just too angry for it. She likely thinks sunflowers are a shade plant.
February 11th, 2010 at 7:23 pm
Michelle goes out every day to tax the venus fly traps on their earned income.
February 11th, 2010 at 8:20 pm
Why won’t the White House tell the truth to the American people?
Uh, because its two official occupants are both lawyers? It’s not a coincidence that lawyer and liar sound a lot alike.
February 11th, 2010 at 11:37 pm
Oh big deal, I’m sure in whatever country Obama’s a citizen it’s just part of their custom to lie about everything.
February 11th, 2010 at 11:44 pm
has the VodkaPundit heard about this watering can?
February 12th, 2010 at 4:53 am
Fat kids can’t “sneak”! Everyone hears them plodding along breathing really heavy…
February 12th, 2010 at 8:57 am
On a related note, from last July Innominatus kinda sorta explains why The First Veggies are inedible.
http://innominatus87.blogspot.com/2009/07/barry-potent-fashion-statements.html
February 12th, 2010 at 8:57 pm
Yea, I had read some time ago that the entire Rose Garden was contaminated with lead and that ALL the veggies had to be tossed, making the whole victory garden thing a sham…