Straight Line of the Day: Polls Show Obama Losing Another Demographic…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…
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October 19th, 2012 at 12:15 pm
…the breathing
October 19th, 2012 at 12:18 pm
…the late Walter Cronkite.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:26 pm
Likely voters.
taxpayers.
US Citizens.
Dog owners.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:28 pm
…one-eyed, one-horned, flying, purple people eaters
…babies that he’s made cry with his ugly ears.
…everyone who wants him to resign NOW.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:28 pm
. . . Americans with three-digit IQs
October 19th, 2012 at 12:29 pm
. . . voters who have read Hans Christian Andersen’s stories
October 19th, 2012 at 12:34 pm
…Now he’s even losing the cats!
October 19th, 2012 at 12:37 pm
… Unicorns.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:39 pm
… the Clintons
October 19th, 2012 at 12:41 pm
…the Russians. Don’t forget the Russians.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:42 pm
…flexible people.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:44 pm
…Blue Dog Democrats with red asses.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:48 pm
Spouses. Michelle was quoted as saying “I mean c’mon. did you see that 1st debate? It was his damn anniversary gift to me and talk about needing some viagra, if you know what I mean.”
October 19th, 2012 at 12:53 pm
- Kenyans.
- The people of Rock Ridge.
- The dead Chicago voters
October 19th, 2012 at 12:54 pm
Teleprompter manufacturers
October 19th, 2012 at 12:56 pm
…foreign contributors. That’s it. IT’S OVER! IT’S OVER!
October 19th, 2012 at 12:57 pm
…employees of Waffle House.
October 19th, 2012 at 12:58 pm
…any one not in a coma and even some of them are coming around. (pun unintended but happy happenstance).
October 19th, 2012 at 1:15 pm
The American Communist party has deserted him because they his liberal views are too extreme for them.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:16 pm
The writers from SNL
October 19th, 2012 at 1:17 pm
Ozombies
October 19th, 2012 at 1:27 pm
The youth vote, who are now so stupid they can’t figure out how to vote at all.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:29 pm
dog eaters
October 19th, 2012 at 1:37 pm
…The Men In Black.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:47 pm
…the Muslim Brotherhood? Nope.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:54 pm
… Single young blacks who say things like “ROIT, gunna roit if the mofo white g gets it”.
Just kidding. The crazy racists are still his to loose.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:55 pm
…, nervous hollywood actors. GAME OVER, MAN! GAME OVER!!!!
October 19th, 2012 at 1:57 pm
… jerks hectoring employees working the drive in of Chik-Fil-A.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:57 pm
…fashion designers catering to Wookies.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:58 pm
…some of the legalize CHOOM! crowd… and only because they didn’t smoke yesterday.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:59 pm
, The International Brotherhood of Waffle Flippers.
October 19th, 2012 at 1:59 pm
…illegal immigrants employed by the arugala industry.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:01 pm
…choomsters everywhere because they were so bummed.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:02 pm
…the Canine Condiment Committee.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:03 pm
…, Klingons.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:05 pm
Howz’ about every American who has to choose between Generic/Store Brand or Brand Name in a grocery store?
Them’s there amounts to a couple of dozen…….
October 19th, 2012 at 2:09 pm
…over vs. under toilet paper advocates.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
…the Senate.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:21 pm
…weinnerdogs.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:26 pm
…and it’s not optimal for his chances.
October 19th, 2012 at 2:52 pm
Bacon to Former Hostage!
October 19th, 2012 at 3:04 pm
….Michelles’ relatives, the Klingons.
October 19th, 2012 at 3:12 pm
Illinois pets who, while normally reliable Democrat voters, were turned off by Obama’s dog-eating policies.
October 19th, 2012 at 3:45 pm
…choom smokers
…people with “green jobs” that stimulus money paid for
…Mexicans with gunshot wounds
October 19th, 2012 at 3:57 pm
Cats
October 19th, 2012 at 4:03 pm
Moochelle’s 43 servants.
She has more servants than the Queen of England!
(probably)
Valerie Jarrett’s 5 or 6 Secret Service agents. Who thought they were suppose to guard the President and are wondering just who that is.
October 19th, 2012 at 4:30 pm
26 year old children on their parent’s plan.
October 19th, 2012 at 4:42 pm
Hyphenated-Americans.
October 19th, 2012 at 4:46 pm
10% of the 47%.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:01 pm
…youtube video producers
October 19th, 2012 at 5:01 pm
The seven states that joined the Union after Hawaii.
Cats.
The Walking Dead.
Rocking chair grannies.
. . . and such polls were immediately labeled flawed and racist.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:12 pm
…the twelve people who voted for him that know what a demographic is.
…the miserable gays that actually got married.
…the college grads who got massive paper cuts when they had to use faded Obama posters for TP.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:32 pm
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…all the demigods who can’t keep compete with a demagogue demigod.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:32 pm
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…late night talk show hosts, which he considers “The Media”.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:36 pm
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…Guantanamo detainees.
October 19th, 2012 at 5:40 pm
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…dead Jewish people in Florida, because of the “snub” to Netenyahu .( Fortunately, he is still very strong with dead people in Chicago).
October 19th, 2012 at 5:42 pm
Polls show Obama losing another demographic…muppets and puppets with a hand up their “Wazoo”…Oh, my bad…that’s where he is gaining support ! “Never mind”
October 19th, 2012 at 5:46 pm
…women in binders
…educational puppets
…black American Presidents
…the 7 “extra” states
…Gallup polsters
…the all important 18-36 month-old demographic
…BOTH MSNBC viewers
October 19th, 2012 at 5:52 pm
…Americans
…bacon producers
…eukaryotes
October 19th, 2012 at 5:54 pm
…Occupy Wall Street. Well, it’s not like they would get off their lazy butts to go out and actually vote for him, that’s too much work. They’re just not going to support him anymore because, it turns out, their new Obama phones aren’t the latest iPhone model. That’s totally bogus, dude!
October 19th, 2012 at 6:04 pm
… Newscasters.
October 19th, 2012 at 6:36 pm
…the unmedicated.
October 19th, 2012 at 6:39 pm
…sentients.
October 19th, 2012 at 7:36 pm
bacon to #58 women in binders
October 19th, 2012 at 9:21 pm
This is one where I really should have been on the ball earlier. I was going to say smart people. I’ll just say bacon to whatever Jimmy posted.
October 19th, 2012 at 9:50 pm
Dead people
October 19th, 2012 at 10:57 pm
his favorite Greek statue……
Penis de Milo
October 20th, 2012 at 6:22 am
…the American public. Now the Russians, Chinese and Iranians, on the other hand…
October 20th, 2012 at 12:58 pm
Obamacare recipients waiting for the Death Panel to decide if they’re worthy of medical attention. Oddly enough, he’s really gaining with the Obamacare recipients who died waiting for the Death Panel to decide if they’re worthy of medical attention. Also, that demographic is expected to be the fastest growing voter bloc starting in 2014.
October 22nd, 2012 at 8:22 pm
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