The poll is closed.
Damn this was a close one. 239 votes total.
The question was: Describe how bombing Paris will help Uganda’s economy.
And the winning answer is: Answer 1, written by Serenity of Serenity’s Journal. It got 64 votes (27%).

A loud cheer will erupt, “Paris is burning!” and millions of people will race to the streets all over the world to party. The next morning, gallons upon gallons of Uganda coffee and tons of Uganda sugar will be needed to revitalize everyone. This process will be repeated for years as there is no such thing as, “Celebrating too much after Paris falls.” While everyone is happy and drunk, a contest will emerge to rename the, “Paris Club debt relief” and all proceeds will go to Uganda. This will be cause for another great celebration and the festivities will continue for another 100 years.

Answer 2 was written by Pink Zebra of Experimenting with Mental Exhibitionism. It got 54 votes (23%).

Since coffee is Uganda’s main export, bombing Paris would cause a decrease in demand for the coffee it imports from India, repackages and sells to Vietnamese restaurants in the United States where it is brewed and mixed with sweetened, condensed milk to make Vietnamese coffee. The resulting destabilization of the global coffee market, the world’s second-most widely traded commodity, would inevitably work to Uganda’s economic favor as soon as Donald Rumsfield finds out that Vietnam (the world’s second largest exporter of coffee) STILL hasn’t been blown off the map yet. Uganda’s only rival in dominating the world coffee market would then be, Brazil, currently the number one exporter of coffee and also a country which not only blatantly harbors monkeys but continues to discover new species of them within its own borders. Clearly, something will be done about Brazil before Uganda’s economy completely implodes.

Answer 3 was written by Wince of Wince and Nod. It got 15 votes (6%).

Drunk with ambition and crazed by syphilis, Idi Amin decided that the path to riches and world power would be for Uganda to surpass France as the greatest wine producer. By kidnapping the greatest French grape growers, Idi was able to make Ugandan vineyards the envy of Africa. Foreseeing his own downfall and eventual demise, Amin had long ago arranged a secret cloning project. Now his clone is poised to bring their plot to fruition by bombing Paris, making Entebbe the wine-making capital of the world.

Answer 4 was written by Nephi of The Stormin’ Mormon. It got 39 votes (16%).

Bombing Paris would ideally result in the elimination of the French Government. As such, French farms would no longer be subsidized, allowing Ugandan goods to be more competitive. France’s clout in the EU would also be destroyed, paving the way for removal of importation bans on Genetically Modified Foods making genetic modification a profitable investment for Uganda. As Ugandan scientists exploit their new freedom they will develop superior strains of mutant celery capable of intimidating neighbors into paying tribute. Sadly, these mutant vegitables may not be able to conquer France itself, as the French Army may suddenly become competent with the removal of the government.

Answer 5 was written by Dave of The Wise Man Says. It got 10 votes (4%).

Bombing Paris will create thousands of jobs in the cleaning up of the residue and ashes (and blood and guts, and the slaughter of any remaining bad French people, which will be all of them because we will convince the good ones to immigrate to the US or to Britain before we bomb them). We will hire Ugandans to do this, thus pumping millions into their economy.

Answer 6 was written by Tiger of Tiger: Raggin’ & Rantin’. It got 57 votes (24%).

I suspect that if we flew over Paris and shoved a million Ugandans out of airplanes, the economy of Uganda would immediately improve. Paris would be a bloody mess.

I’m almost ashamed to admit that was the one I voted for. It almost won, too, but, so far, I still keep the tradition of never voting for the winner in one of my polls.
Congratulations again to Serenity of Serenity’s Journal who joins Tom Bridge of Adventures in Trouble Shooting as a finalist.
New poll tomorrow of Group C and the questions for Group D.