Answers to Frank’s questions.
1. Who the hell do you think you are?
I am Arthur! King of the Britons!… at least until my meds kick in.
2. So, other than blogging, what’s your job? Do you work at some fast food joint, dumbass?
I work at a bank where I make sure that women and minorities don’t borrow our precious money. And if I worked at a fast food joint, I’d dry my armpits with your napkins and spit in your fries. But only if your name were Ted Rall.
3. Do you have like any experience in journalism, idiot?
I used to deliver newspapers. Cheered up a few lonely housewives while I was doing it, too. I think one was Ted Rall’s mom.
4. Do you even read newspapers?
I don’t, but my parrot does. If by “read”, you mean “crap on”.
5. Do you watch any other news than FOX News propaganda, you ignorant fool?
Does the Playboy Channel count?
6. I bet you’re some moron talk radio listener too, huh?
“Moron Talk Radio”? OH! Air America! Yeah, I listen to that on occasion. Say, does Al Franken’s little sidekick Katherine Lanpher remind anyone else of Salcious Crumb, with her constant shrieks of sycophantic laughter? “EEEE-HE-HE-HE-HE-HE! Al make funny!”
7. So, do you get a fax from the GOP each day for what to say, you @#$% Republican parrot?
My parrot reads newspapers, not faxes. See item #4
8. Why do you and your blogger friends want to silence and fire everyone who disagrees with you, fascist?
Because they interrupt me while I’m watching the Playboy Channel.
9. Are you completely ignorant of other countries, or do you actually own a passport?
I know a LOT about Belgium, and my passport was a 90,000 ton aircraft carrier.
10. Have you even been to another country, you dumb hick?
Yes. Mostly to support the local international fornication establishments, but still, yes.
11. If you’re so keen on the war, why haven’t you signed up, chickenhawk?
Been there. Done that. Got the National Defense Service Medal.
12. Do you have any idea of the horrors of war? Have you ever reached into a pile of goo that was your best friend’s face?
Sorry, I was a Sailor, so I didn’t see many goo-piles. However I did once reach into a shark’s mouth to retrieve the leg he’d just bitten off of me. Then I beat him to death with it. Teach HIM to interrupt my Playboy Channel watching.
13. Have you ever reached into any pile of goo?
Yes. See item #10.
14. Once again, who the hell do you think you are?!
I’m strong to the finish
‘cuz I eats me spinach
Don’t F*** with the sailor man!
TOOT! TOOT!