After a few schoolgirls got gunned down by Palestinians, Israel reinstated some roadblocks and security measures they’d previously removed as “goodwill” gestures.
In response, United States envoy Lieutenant General William Ward has told the Israelis “to take steps to ease the daily plight of the Palestinian people.”
Aren’t you glad this idiot isn’t in Iraq and Afghanistan, getting American troops killed with touchy-feely humanitarian gestures to cold-blooded killers?
Or better yet, why not put in in charge of a militarized Mexican-American border, handing out blanks to the troops patroling our Southern frontier and passing out water bottles, bus passes, and free cell phones with LULAC and the ACLU on speed-dial?
WARD: “Mister President, the Mexicans are launching rockets from Tijuana into San Diego.”
W: “It’s just California, Kipper. They didn’t vote for me.”
KARL: “San Diego’s a lot of red in that blue, sir. And they’re killing children.”
W: “We’d better help my old pal Vicente, then. Release all Mexican nationals in the federal prison systems and return them to Mexico. Then give back all that land we’ve been occupyin.”
CHENEY: “Not the Gadsden Purchase! As Gadsden goes, so does the nation!”
W: Oh, and we’d better upgrade the weapons of the Mexican Police.”
WARD: “What about the corrupt officials in their ranks?”
W: “That’s their problem to sort out.”
WARD: “Yes, sir!”
Would never happen. Instead, Tijuana would be bombed into a blood-and-body parts margarita.
We’ll see how long Ward lasts before Sharon finally kicks him out or makes him sit at the kid’s table during meals