Senator Barack Obama, recently taking more criticism for his associations with unrepentant terrorist William Ayers and racist preacher Jeremiah Wright, has now been found to have yet another questionable associate: Blogger and brutal killer of puppies Glenn Reynolds.
Glenn Reynolds (left) and Barack Obama (right) about to have drinks together.
Reynolds is a blogger, a type of writer who slanders others on the internet while wearing sleeping garments. Even more disturbingly, it’s well documented that to keep up the energy to “blog” all day long, Glenn Reynolds puts live puppies into blenders and consumes the results. This has earned him the name “puppy blender” from fellow bloggers.
The exact association between Glenn Reynolds and Barack Obama is unclear, but when Reynolds was asked whether the two had associated in past, he answered, “Indeed.” The Obama campaign was less forthcoming, finally claiming that Obama barely knows Reynolds and has simply had drinks with him on a few occasions. When asked what those drinks were, his campaign said, “It is not reasonable to expect Barack Obama to know the ingredients of everything he imbibes.” They also denied that Obama knew Reynolds puts puppies in blenders, even though this is a well known fact on the internet.
Governor Sarah Palin was quick to seize on this controversy, saying at a campaign stop, “Glenn Reynolds is a horrible man. He is brutal to puppies. He murders hobos and worships Satan. Worst of all, he doesn’t link to IMAO quite often enough. And this is Obama’s friend. This is not what we want for America. Doggonit, It’s not even what we’d want for Mexico.”
Will it blend? That is the question.
Obama: “You’ve got too low a setting. Let me turn it up for you.”
Hmmm… hair of the dog… it’s good for pre-election hangovers.
Hunh. For some reason this sounds familiar… http://www.imao.us/index.php/2008/10/imao-exclusive-obama-is-a-meth-addict/#comment-2320
I’m sad that FrankJ sort of yoinked my idea… 😥
Okay, not really, but I wanted an excuse to try out these neato emoticons. 😆
Wow, I guess I’ll have to vote for Obama after all!
heh ™.
Lies! All lies, you racist crackers! Everyone knows that I get My bursts of energy from only the finest crack!
I was there when Reynolds was asked whether the two had associated in past. What he actually said was “Heh. Indeed.”
blendalanche!
I don’t know if I have problem with this. It depends on what breed he’s blending.
I guess Obama is indeed gayer than the day is long…
Sheeeeeeeez, the guy doesn’t even have enough experience to set the speed on a blender!
Do you add bittters & lemon juice?
//The exact association between Glenn Reynolds and Barack Obama is unclear, but when Reynolds was asked whether the two had associated in past, he answered, “Indeed.”//
Can’t…breathe…laughing…too…hard………
So, come clean. Is it true Obama thinks Glenn is Insta-Cute?
(Did this place get SlashDotted or what?)
must stop…emoticons…
Do you think that msbc provides a giant lithium salt lick for Maddow, Olbermann, and Matthews, when they travel?
That’s not the Glenn Reynolds that I knew.
Bitters is good, a dash of lemon, too. But try a few juniper berries as well, takes the edge off the bile and sickening sweetness of pancreatic juices. Still, blender magic or not, there is nothing like a good ’72 squirrel wine. remember, meat is murder, tasty, tasty, and enven quaffable murder,whether lemon, lime or lymph!
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Though, it must be added, Mr. Reynolds calls that speed setting “Poopy Blend.”
Hell, I what to know what make and model the blender is. Mine broke recently while crushing ice just to prepare myself to watch the last debate. Not enough ice or rum. Need more. Help!!
What do you expect……….both are lawyers!
When confronted with the evidence of their relationship, Obama denounced Reynolds by stating, “This is not the Glenn I knew!”. When contacted for his response, Prof. Reynolds merely said “Heh”
You mean to tell me “puppy blender” is two words?
Aaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
All this time I’ve been spelling it “puppyblender” on my blog. I feel like such a fool!
Where’s Mr. Reynolds left hand? It kind of looks like he’s grabbing the one’s buns. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.