His Royal Weirdness, Michael Jackson, is touring again.
My reaction to the news was, of course, whoop-de-frikkin-do.
It’s not often that Michael Jackson makes the news anymore. Unless, of course, he’s paying off some kid’s family so they don’t talk about the buggering.
Used to not be that way, though. Michael Jackson used to be news.
He’d sell out concerts, sell millions of albums, perform or do backing vocals on a third of every record played on the radio, have major movie producers doing his videos …
That was a while back.
Then I got to thinking. When did it all come crashing down for Michael Jackson?
As I recall, it was in the early 1990s.
When he was young, he was a popular Black singer. And rich. He was even able to out-bid Paul McCartney for the Beatles music catalog.
Around the early 1990s, though, things went wrong. First, he seems to have turned White. And was accused of child molestation. And got hooked on drugs (mostly painkillers). And lost most of his money.
Since then, he’s been almost pitiful.
But something was nagging at me.
Then it hit me.
There’s a parallel with Barack Obama. Follow me on this.
Obama was raised by his White mother (his Kenyan father having left) until he was 10, then by his White grandparents until he graduated high school.
He went to Harvard, graduated, then moved to Chicago in the early 1990s. That’s when he became Black.
Around the time Michael Jackson turned White, Barack Obama turned Black.
It seems the world only has room for one Black superstar at a time. I’m not saying it’s right. I’m just saying.
Will Jacko’s tour succeed? Probably not. Unless Obama turns White again.
Obama’s hair looks to be well on its way to “whiteness”. Does that count???
“Will Jacko’s tour succeed?” I think it will. His nose seems to have stopped migrating around his face.
Mike must keep the superglue near in case his nose falls off again. I think he had done to him the same thing female porn stars have done to their bungie holes called “Anal Bleaching” ( in wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_bleaching )
Clothes and makeup can change a person’s looks, Has anyone seen THE OBAMA and the gloved freak in the same place at the same time?
Michael Jackson is the missing link. I’m not sure what he is a link to, but he’s link to something of that I am sure.
Obama can not be Micheal Jackson….because he is RuPaul.
He’s had time to recruit a new dance team…
… better still, this should be his ONLY tour stop.
If Obama changed colors the seeds would be on the outside and the rind would be in the middle.
I would just like to say…
MONKEY!
‘Night.
If you can’t say something nice………………..
Has anyone seen Michael Obama and Michael Jackson in the same room? I’m just sayin… I know Michael would have had to pumped up a lot, but in the age of “roids” anything is possible. Has anyone ever given her nose a good tug?
I’m not a conspiracy nut, but I do believe the story that both of them were overheard in a bus station mens room in the late 90s making plans to one day make black AND white people ashamed of their race.
That would have been more clever if I had said ’80s’
A story, only somewhat on topic:
The Cowboy & The Widow
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other was a drunk.
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher’s widow said to the hired hand, ‘You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels.’ The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o’clock came, however, and he didn’t return. Two o’clock and no hired hand.
Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher’s widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him. She quietly called him over to her. ‘Unbutton my blouse and take it off,’ she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. ‘Now take off my boots.’ He did as she asked, ever so slowly. Now take off my socks.’ He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. ‘Now take off my skirt.’ He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light. ‘Now take off my bra.’ Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said, ‘If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you’re fired.’
That was soooooooooo where I didn’t think it was going to go. Heh heh.
GeeSus no kidding. Have you seen the Larry Sinclair news conference on YouTube where he said that he got coke for Barack Obama then gave him head? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Lrf8DbrJH0
Corrupt and getting it on the down-low!
If 19 tequilas do not get the taste of this economy destroying president out of your mouth 20 will not either.
Is it just me, or does Jacko look like he got a new chin also? I can imagine him going into Tom’s Rhinoplasty and saying “Yes, I want the Jay Leno. WOOOOO!” and then does a 360 crotch grab.
So, when, exactly did Obama turn into Ozymandias?
I’m guessing about the time he appeared in a popular comic book…
#14 – Jimmy,
Sa-Lute!
As I watched the crowd mindlessly cheering and screaming over the likes of Michael Jackson, I said “Oh look! Obama voters!”
Since he converted to islam, will they cut is head off for singing and dancing since sharia doesn’t allow either?