So Democrats in the House overwhelmingly reelected Nancy Pelosi as their leader. And why not? How often do you get a chance to say you’re being led by the most unpopular politicians alive. And thus Democrats continue their quest to be as absolutely unappealing as possible to the majority of Americans.
Really, though, what could Democrats have appointed as their leader that would be more appealing than her? Let’s name a few:
THINGS THAT ARE MORE APPEALING THAN NANCY PELOSI
* Clamshell packaging
* The TSA
* A monkey with a sniper rifle
* Diabetes
* M. Night Shyamalan The Last Airbender
* Detroit
* Jim DeMint’s stupid, fat face
* Windows Vista
But I don’t want to tell the Democrats what to do. I’m sure it’s all part of a super smart plan or something.
Kim Jong Ill
The Joker
Generic Mac and Cheese
Old gym socks
Pepsi Clear
Keith Olbermann
Being shot in the junk with a musket
Root canal without anethesia
Putting my hand in a vise and smashing it with a hammer
I’ll stick with the Microsoft Theme:
* Zune
* Steve Balmer throwing chairs
* Internet Explorer in a botnet
* “Microsoft Bob”
Coco Cola Black
Alka Seltzer II (never chalky, never gritty)
A face punch from Fred Thompson
Whatever is in buttercup’s diaper
Cop Rock
Olean Potato Chips
Outsourced tech support
wheat germ
vegan Thanksgiving dinner
Explosive diarrhea
Levi Johnson coming to take your 17 year old daughter out on a date
Joy Behar at a Tea Party gathering
Zima at a Biker Bar
Marylin Manson on stage at a Bluegrass festival
Joe Biden at a Mensa convention
Being groped in the testicles by TSA at the airport.
No, wait…
Ex-wife #1
Ex-wife #2
Ex-wife #3….
* A bucket (she and Obama are a team, after all)
* Belly Button Lint (to borrow from the earlier post — belly button lint is the gift that keeps on giving)
* A nit (same brainpower but consumes less oxygen)
* A duck <==It's Duck Season!
* Phlegm
Democrats believe that every time a government program is tried and fails it just means that they didn’t do enough of it, so their solution is ALWAYS to spend even more money on it the next year. So, it makes sense that they think the solution to voters hating Pelosi is way more Pelosi.
@Son of Bob: We need to elect her so we can find out what’s inside.
Charles Manson or Rangel or Brown
Girl who threw puppies in the river
Obama
TSA agent Edward Scissor Hands
NAMBLA
* Chevy Volt
* Ham for Passover
* Painful Rectal Itch
@Burmashave,
Eww, I can only imagine what’s inside. We can already see what’s on the outside.
Punching Hippies
Pelosi’s election as Minority Leader is awesome. It assures she’ll stay in the limelight and keep talking stupid and be the best generator of votes for the GOP. With Pelosi the Republicans in Congress need only to pick their nose, throw spitballs at each other and shoot down all Obama bills over the next two years to secure another GOP labdslide in 2012.
Egg Omelette MRE
Icy-Hot in my jock
Hill-a-ree!
* A winter at the Chosin Resorvoir
* Orcs
* ussjimmycarter
* Robert McNamara
* Windows ME
* DOS 1.0
* Lines at the DMV
* NPR
* Truthers
* Birthers
* Westburo Baptist Church members
* Burrito Nite at the Old Folks Home
Being voted in as minority speaker is, I am sure, part of a plan of some sort. However I would disagree that it’s a super smart plan.
* Hemorrhoids
* democrat hemorrhoids
* Sharing a cell with Bubba
* Dinner at the bidens
* Dinner at the ohoubamaaasss
* kissing the first Sasquatch
*Sucking chest wound
*Being trapped in an elevator with Keith Olbermutt and Rosie O’Donnel making out in the corner
*Being set up on a blind date, only to discover it’s Joy Behar. And she’s horny.
*Mecrob
Jammie Foxx as Shaniqua
Franco the dead fascist.
The cast of locals from Deliverance
That stuff that gets around your lips when you’re really thirsty.
Hee. The monkey looks like he’s using a .303 Enfield. Not a lot of recoil, but enough to make him wish he’d kept his eye a tad further back from the scope.
Ha ha! Bloody monkey!
“…cold toilet seats, dentist’s chairs, and trips to the DMV.” Les Claypool prophetically answered this years ago, and being from CA, it makes sense that he should answer.
Be sure to say thank you to her!
http://dailycaller.com/2010/11/17/be-sure-to-sign-the-thank-you-card-for-nancy-pelosi/
Don’t knock it, or as my daddy used to say “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” This is the best deal the republicans could have asked for. Somebody to point at and say “Look! See…?!”
This whole situation reminds me a lot of the cartoon series Pinky and the Brain…just a change or two and we’ve got it covered, for exhample…………..
From the end of “Brain’s Night Off,” after a series of unsuccessful attempts to pass bills most Americans hate.
B: Come, Pelosi. We must return to the congress to prepare for tomorrow night.
P: Gee, Brain, what are we going to do tomorrow night?
B: The only thing Democrats know how to have any fun doing. Trying to take over the world! Cue the theme song!
They’re Pelosi and The Brain
Yes, Pelosi and The Brain
One is a genius
The other’s insane.
They’re Demo’s not so nice
Their genes have all been spliced
They’re dinky
They’re Pelosi and The Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain
Brain…..Narf!
A spastic colon.
Glad to see clamshell packaging up there. It brings warm nostalgia to my heart.
Joy Behar’s Maxim spread
Ann Murray “The Complete Works”
Rob Schneider movies
Captain Jack Sparrow
A Tribble
Princess Buttercup or my very own Miss Cecily (both about 2 months old)
Clamshell packaging in a spastic colon?
I’m gonna need brain ammonia for that image.
Do you work for the TSA, Corona? Sounds like you need a “CME” – Coronal Mass Ejection! (It’s a solar event… very stellar.)
Shingles
Barney Frank’s pet gerbil
McRib Sammich
Abba
Zima
An inanimate carbon rod
Whooping Cough
Restless Leg Syndrome
Those annoying yogurt commercials… it’s not boston cream pie! It’s yogurt!
That baboon has one nice sporterized Lee-Enfield. Is it OK to be jelous of monkeys in such a situation as this, or must we simply hate them?
Remember that guy who lead the Donner Party? Yeah, him.