Random Thoughts

Accidentally forgot Random Thoughts yesterday, so here are extra thoughts!

The plan to keep Social Security solvent by the time I retire is to find an alien civilization and embezzle all their space money.

I think the person who could enter the GOP presidential race this late and really shake things up is Mayor McCheese.

Did Oprah give everyone who watched her finale a free car? STILL NOT WORTH IT!

Instead of a cross-country bus tour, Sarah Palin should have a cross-country death race.

P Diddy can call himself whatever he wants, but we should all get together and agree to call him Oliver.

Could we put Barney Frank in prison? I think that would be a great symbol of economic recovery.

43 Comments

  1. Frank, I’m detecting some non-randomness in your thoughts. I think you need a larger sample size capable of passing a T-test.

    Now, if they’d just pull the Oprah re-runs off the air, we’d be set.

    The other day, I started making a list of everything that need undoing from the Obama / Pelosi years. It was so depressing I had to break it off and raid the fridge.

  2. Sarah Palin’s bus is called the Bus of Doom! I’m certain it has gun ports and plenty of them! At each port I’m thinkin’ there is probably a fully loaded and chambered 30X30! Also, if someone really wants to dance I would expect the bottom side of the bus to open and a Rocket Launcher to slide out. This will end and evil doers future exploits on the spot!

    Plus, I hear that Sarah Palin has been punching her hands into first sand and has worked her way up to super hot rocks! She’s ready for some face and nad punchin’ if a libtard reporter asks any stupid questions! One punch…dead!

    Mitt Romney can be found curled up under his bead with his banky! The GOP never told him it was going to be this hard and he’s crying for his Mommy to make the bad lady go away!

  3. No, we can’t put Barney Frank in prison. That would violate Article Five of The Constitution by imposing “cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment” on the other prisoners. Only other members of congress and residents of Massachusetts deserve such treatment.

  4. Why not substitute a car race for the election. Start in California in a place like Watts and first driver to Washington wins. I am guessing that a Republican (armed with their trust semi-automatic stored in their Easy Rider Rifle Rack) would make it out of Watts first and their old-school, gas guzzling, Ford F-150 would haul ass a lot faster than a Chevy Volt that has to get plugged in every few hundred miles.

  5. The plan to keep Social Security solvent by the time I retire is to find an alien civilization and embezzle all their space money.

    This will work only if the Democrats don’t control Congress and the White House. If they do, they’ll spend all the money and claim that it’s for the elderly and, of course, the children. This will be partially true since many Democrats in Congress are elderly and they all act like children.

  6. PSSSST….. Frank, don’t tell Obama about the space money. He’ll go looking for it and then we will be in space debt, too.

    Why not run Mayor McCheese? We ahve the clown and clones in Washington now.

    I thought P-Diddy’s other name was Defendant.

    We should put Barney Frank in Sherrif Joe’s prison in Arizona. Barney would get to wear pink and be locked up with other men. Never mind, that is what Barney calls a vacation.

  7. 1. Barney Frank has heard all the horror stories and secretly wants to go to prison.

    2. We canceled the SETI program, and turned Nasa into a Muslim Feel better Center so the Social Security plan isn’t likely to work.

    3. Who is this Oprah of which you speak? I have a job.

  8. “The plan to keep Social Security solvent by the time I retire is to find an alien civilization and embezzle all their space money.”

    We already have one alien civilization, and instead of embezzling their money, we give them ours and allow them to send it back to their planet…err, I mean, dirty, miserable country. So I don’t think your plan will work.

  9. The plan to keep Social Security solvent by the time I retire is to find an alien civilization and embezzle all their space money.

    The best way to keep Social Security solvent is to add all government employees to it, instead of their current retirement plans.

  10. Just kidding Basil. I do read your entries here, and enjoy them. My comments are rarely noticed here. It must have been the four lettered word in quotations that got me noticed/moderated.
    DamnCat, isn’t that what keyboards are for? So we do not have to actually interact with people in the real world, while beleiving we are more connected.

  11. Larsinkima? Who are you? Lars? I just noticed you here and would like to subscribe to your newsletter if you have one. You’re one funny dude/dudette (hey, I’m just trying to be gender neutral here, like those parents keeping their child’s gender secret and undetermined like ussjimmycarter!).

  12. Larsinkima – Sure, it starts out as innocent flirting in blog comments. Pretty soon its long late-night talks in a private chatroom. Then a rendevous in some small town where no one knows either of you. Next thing you know you get slapped with a court order telling you to pay kitten support for a whole litter for the next 18 cat years.

  13. Barney Frank in prision is like…..

    * Lindsy Lohan in a cocaine lab
    * Hugh Hefner in a house of ill-repute
    * Ed Shultz in an all-you-can-eat buffet
    * A NY Times reporter in an echo chamber
    * Cindy McCain in a glass house
    * Rachel Maddow in an LPGA tournament
    * Barack Obama in your wallet

  14. Barney Frank in prison is like…..

    * Lindsy Lohan in a cocaine lab
    * Hugh Hefner in a house of ill-repute
    * Ed Shultz in an all-you-can-eat buffet
    * A NY Times reporter in an echo chamber
    * Cindy McCain in a glass house
    * Rachel Maddow in an LPGA tournament
    * Barack Obama in your wallet

  15. Larsinkima, just so you’ll know, you should wonder about me and ussjimmycarter. I mean, like the guy has 12″ mosquito horns mounted on his living room walls and hangs out with all kids of weird, half-dead people like Hillary and Helen Thomas and Oprah Winitfree (all with questionable genders). Do I look like the kind of guy who does that? Hmmm? Huh? Uh, ok, don’t answer that! Now look at his avatar. See what I mean? Look at his giant proboscis!!! What does he need a multi-purpose tool tool like that for if he isn’t messing around with stuff?

  16. Larsinkima, me and Jimmy the same dude? First, I live in Minneapolis and he live in the very ghey state of Oregon! Second, he was away for an extended period and when he got back he had some lameo story. We all knew, however that he was traveling with Hillary Clinton as her personal sex toy to “service her” as she pleased. There was even talk of a (three-some) with Janet Reno but I don’t want to spread any rumors…
    Hey Jimmy, that 12″ isn’t hangin’ on the wall, if you know what I’m talkin’ about!!!

  17. Larsinkima, don’t believe a word of what ussjimmycarter says about me. There’s no freakin way I’d ever live in a state with an income tax! Oregon is strictly for tree-huggers and pot smokers! As to those 12″ horns he claims aren’t hangin, the question is where exactly are they since he has them removed every time they grow back???!!! Ow!

    You’re up rather late, aren’t you, ussjc? Oprah called and said she’d be there at 05:00. Better get some rest.

  18. “The plan to keep Social Security solvent”

    Now here’s a random thought: When they say no one over 55 will be affected do they mean people born before May 28, 1956 or, when they say the same thing tomorrow, will it mean no one born before May 29, 1956? If they can screw around until May 28, 2066 then no one alive today would have to worry.

  19. Well Lars, until now I didn’t know I was the same person. Thanks for clearing that up, FormerHostage…err…I mean…thanks to me for clearing that up.

    As far as Mayor McCheese goes, what’s up with the fact that mayors sometimes serve forever? McCheese has been mayor since the ’70’s. How did he swing that deal? Bribes? Secret dealings with the Hamburgler? Dirt on Ron McDonald?

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