So apparently Obama has a jobs council since he’s so focused on jobs, but he hasn’t met with them in six months. Of course, considering the sort of people Obama would put in a jobs council, they didn’t really have the greatest output anyway. Here’s some advice that came from them:
OBAMA JOBS COUNCIL ADVICE
“I checked the book of Job in the Bible for some ideas. How about a deal with the devil?”
“We looked up ‘job’ on Wikipedia, but then we clicked on one of the links in it and then another link and another and somehow eventually ended up on a page about the Metal Gear Solid video game and decided to play video games. So new job idea: soldier cloning program.”
“Can we hire someone to fetch us drinks? That would be a job.”
“Apparently lots of jobs involve lifting heavy stuff and people making sure you do your work well and on time. They sound awful. Are we sure we want to inflict more of those on the country?”
“If we made more jobs councils, we could hire people for those.”
“How about some sort of jobs creating robot? We could program it also to not kill humans… though that probably is the easiest way to open up more jobs.”
“We were going to talk to someone who has created a business before, but none of us know anyone like that.”
“I got the solution: A jobs bill.”
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UPDATE: Linked by YouViewed
I have a committee on committees that doesn’t do anything but recommend future committees. I don’t attend their meeting either. Which I guess makes me sorta like BHO, Oh crap I need deliverance.
That depends on what the meaning of “job” is.
I guess when you’re Obama and your “jobs council” agrees with your opponent, rather than change your mind you just ignore the jobs council: http://www.aei-ideas.org/2012/07/awkward-obamas-job-council-agrees-with-romneys-corporate-tax-plan/
good thing the council didn’t read exodus 5, or there would be a lot of people out looking for straw ( tinyurl.com/7dkwgzn )
“The president should pivot and focus laser-like on jobs. That should fix it.”
“Whatever we do, we shouldn’t do anything for entrepreneurs – they never did anything to create jobs.”
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He met plenty with his healthcare experts and his oil drilling experts, and we saw what happened. I’d prefer that he stay away from the jobs experts. We actually had one good month out of the last six, didn’t we?
I think I might actually prefer that he plays golf every day for the remainder of his term.
Redefine the criteria for “work” in the Welfare law so that we can say that anybody who gets a massage, helps a friend move, or exercises is working and, ergo, has a job!