Archive of entries posted on February 2013

Random Thoughts: Love, Water, and Candy Hearts

Posted by on

Have they confirmed Dorner dead? Has any more information come out about the water Rubio drank?

The minimum wage is and always will be zero dollars an hour. Moron politicians will continue to make sure lots of people stay at minimum.

Know what would help the economy: Idiots in D.C. with no business experience coming up with arbitrary numbers they think wages should be.

Minimum wage for a business creator can actually be less than zero dollars per hour.

So we’re all basically in agreement that the water thing demonstrates a serious, disqualifying character flaw for Rubio, right?

Now when Rubio talks about the dangers of government spending, everyone is just going to roll their eyes and say, “Whatever, water-drinker.”

My favorite part of the State of the Union address was when Christopher Dorner burned to death.

So will the water drinking thing will have more or less an effect on Rubio’s career than Ted Kennedy drowning a woman and fleeing the scene?

I’m predicting in the future leftwingers will wave water bottles at Rubio and think they’re making a point.

Candy hearts are basically just chalk and sugar, right?

I hope drinking coffee isn’t a career-ender or I do nothing but end careers all day.

My wife tells me I’m supposed to drink six ended careers a day, but that just seems like a lot of careers to end.

HOLD ME LIKE YOU DID BY THE LAKE ON NABOO #CandyHeartsRejects

YOU DID’T BUILD THAT #CandyHeartRejects

TAKE WITH ALCOHOL #CandyHeartRejects

I DIDN’T KILL MY WIFE #CandyHeartRejects

I AM RESIGNING AS POPE #CandyHeartRejects

NOT EDIBLE #CandyHeartRejects

MATH CLASS IS TOUGH #CandyHeartRejects

THIS IS MY ONLY WAY TO COMMUNICATE THE HORRORS OF CHINESE SLAVE LABOR #CandyHeartRejects

DICK MORRIS PREDICTS OUR LOVE WILL LAST #CandyHeartRejects

“To break up the gameplay a bit, why don’t you add an escort mission.” -Satan

The importance of being Earnest. And Pam.

Posted by on

A group of six Georgia legislators have proposed a bill in the State House that would make certain fake images illegal. Like when you take the head of one person and put it on, say, a porn star? That would be a crime under the bill.

The actual wording of House Bill 39 says:

… a person commits defamation when he or she causes an unknowing person wrongfully to be identified as the person in an obscene depiction …

The bill goes on to describe what “nudity,” “obscene depiction,” and “sexual conduct” means, in case you didn’t know. It also describes all the fun/naughty parts that make nudity, obscene, and sexual actually nudity, obscene, and sexual.

The six Democrats — you knew the sponsors were all Democrats, right? — really don’t like that kind of humor. Two of them were victims of such prankery, Pam Dickerson* (who introduced a similar bill last year) and Earnest Smith*. The blog Georgia Politics Unfiltered is one of the culprits that prompted such actions. You can search that site for more images, if you want. You don’t want. Trust me.

Still, I understand that those that are victims of such actions might not like it. But, a crime? Such thin skin.

Maybe I’d feel differently if I was the victim of such actions. And, no, this is NOT a call to photoshop some image of my head on a porn star’s body.

Unless it was Jenna Jameson. I’ve always wanted to be Jenna Jameson.

Things Named After Obama: A Parasitical Worm

Posted by on

[High Praise! to Oppo]

Paragordius Obamai

Hair­worms are unique par­a­sites often encoun­tered by the pub­lic. Hair­worms infect crick­ets and grow within their host’s body cav­ity to lengths of 15-30 cen­time­ters. Infected crick­ets often invade homes and release worms into toi­lets, hot tubs, pet water bowls and fish tanks, unduly alarm­ing the pub­lic since hair­worms are not par­a­sites of humans.

When hair­worms com­plete their devel­op­ment, they manip­u­late the cricket’s behav­ior forc­ing them to com­mit sui­cide by jump­ing into water.

Maybe they should’ve named it after Ted Kennedy.

Link of the Day: Like the Boston Tea Party, Except with Guns and Fire

Posted by on

[High Praise! to The Real Revo and Survival Blog]

Nunc Pro Tunc: The Coming Day of Burn Barrels and Blessings

Excerpt:

This is a standing invitation to my fellow Americans: If congress ever enacts a law mandating the registration and/or a production ban of detachable magazine semiautomatic rifles then you are hereby invited to the town square of your local community. There, burn barrels will be set up and we will publicly burn Form 4473s, FFL Bound Books, state and local registration records, and the sales receipts for every firearm in the United States. On that same day, FFL holders and public officials holding electronic firearms records will simultaneously erase those records, permanently and irretrievably. (Using special file erasure software such as Blancco, X-Ways, and Stellar Wipe, or though the physical destruction of disk drives.)

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Wisdom of the Day: Palin Liar Heathers

Posted by on

Juxtaposition Makes Makes Commentary Superfluous

Posted by on

Sylvester Stallone:

“Who… needs an assault weapon? Like really, unless you’re carrying out an assault. … You can’t hunt with it… Who’s going to attack your house, a (expletive) army?”

CBS:

In New York and across the country, the mobs of kids – 20, 30, 40 or more — appear out of nowhere and suddenly charge a newsstand or convenience store.

They ransack, steal and wreak havoc…

Sarah Palin Is So Stupid She Makes Newspapers Stupid

Posted by on

So Washington Post jumped all over a report saying that Sarah Palin was joining Al Jazeera and used it to write a column on how dumb and stupid and horrible Sarah Palin is. Of course, the article saying Palin was joining Al Jazeera was satire.

And just look at some of the quotes from the article:

“Al Jazeera provides high-quality, intelligent coverage of important issues,” Gore said. “And more importantly, it’s backed by oil money. That means when you get paid…you really get paid.”

“Alaska is located very close to the Middle East, yet for some reason we don’t have many Arab tourists,” she said. “We may not have camels, deserts and genies, but we’ve certainly got lots of oil and caribou – which are kinda like the Christian version of camels.”

So it was pretty hard to tell it was satire… if you’re one of those aliens from Galaxy Quest. So no wonder this got through the Washington Post’s many layers of fact checkers. Anyway, the important thing is: Sarah Palin is stupid.

Hey, it’s nice to be able to honestly say that IMAO takes even more effort to be accurate than major newspaper, since on occasion I do Google things.