Heh. German. If you speak like that, you don’t really have any other choice than being evil.

“Never really liked trees,” Bob grumbled as he raked leaves.

“Hey, Bob!” President Obama exclaimed as he walked up to the yard.

Bob couldn’t help but laugh. “Wow, you’ve been really popular lately, haven’t you?”

“Probably because everyone has heard about my big new plans to take on climate change.”

“Actually, I’m pretty sure it’s because of the huge debacle of your Obamacare launch.”

“No… I think people have moved on from that to–”

“Oh no; no one has moved on from that giant disaster,” Bob said. “It’s going to be the text book case of government incompetence for the next century.”

“Well, anyway, my plans for climate change are–”

“And then there’s your lies about everyone being able to keep their health care plan being exposed,” Bob continued.

Obama shuffled his feet and looked at the ground. “I didn’t lie. I just meant–”

“Yeah, you made it really clear,” Bob said. “‘If you like your health care plan, you’ll be able to keep your health care plan, period. No one will take it away, no matter what.’ I mean, you left no wiggle room — even though you knew at the time it was a complete lie.”

“Well, I think people will be happy with the Affordable Care Act when–”

Bob chuckled. “This is just too much. I mean, people might put up with lying or gross incompetence, but with both of them together at this magnitude… wow.”

“Well… uh… So I was talking about doing stuff about climate change,” Obama said. “I’ll probably upset whole industries with my regulations. Do you agree with that?”

Bob shook his head. “No.”

“So I bet you want to make a big deal about it.”

Bob thought about that. “No… I’m still pretty busy making fun of you over Obamacare.”

“I’m also thinking about taking on immigration reform,” Obama said.

Bob went back to raking leaves. “Good for you.”

“It’s basically going to be amnesty,” Obama quickly added. “I’m just going to let anyone be citizens, no matter what laws they break. As long as they vote Democrat, of course.”

Bob dropped his rake. “Come on! You can’t!…” Bob paused for a second. “Oh, I see what you’re doing; you’re trying to make me angry about another issue so I’ll stop talking about your lying and incompetence over Obamacare.” Bob picked back up his rake. “No deal.”

Obama pulled his cigarette lighter out of his suit pocket and then lit a pile of leaves on fire on Bob’s lawn.

“What did you just do?!” Bob yelled.

“Uh oh. A fire on your lawn,” Obama said. “Could burn your whole house down. Better deal with that instead of attacking me on health care.”

Bob looked at the fire long and hard. Finally, he turned to Obama. “No, I’d still rather make fun of you.”

Obama hung his head. “Good call.”

Ever been to a museum in DC?

The Museum of Natural History. The Museum of American History. The Air and Space Museum. There’s others, but I forget.

And they’re pretty cool. At least the few I’ve been to. Dinosaur bones. Mercury spacecraft. Dorothy’s ruby slippers. Bunch of other old stuff.

There’s a group that wants to build a Science Fiction Museum in DC. They’re looking to sponge off visitors to the other museums, such as the Air and Space Museum.

But, is DC the right place for a Science Fiction Museum?

Other museums (or museum-like things) have a tie-in to where they’re located. The Pro Football Hall of Fame (that’s kinda like a museum) is in Canton, Ohio because that’s where the NFL was founded. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (it’s a museum) is in Cleveland, Ohio, because, well, the only real competition it had for hosting it was Detroit, and not even burned-out rockers would go to Detroit. The Baseball Hall of Fame is in Cooperstown, New York, because somebody thought baseball was invented there by Abner Doubleday. It wasn’t, and it wasn’t him anyway. But at the time, they didn’t know better.

And, of course, the other DC museums I mentioned are in DC because that’s where the money James Smithson left the U.S. ended up. His bones ended up there, too, after Alexander Graham Bell went to Italy and got them. (Look it up.)

Anyway, museums should be where the thing they’re museuming about has a connection.

The fiction part, that makes perfect sense in DC. After all, if you like your insurance, you can keep it, right? Not much more fiction than that. It’s the science part that doesn’t fit. Because science uses math. (Look it up.) And nobody in DC know a darn thing about math.

So, I don’t think DC is a good location for a Science Fiction Museum. I think a better place would be The Moon. Or maybe L5. Or Vulcan. Or Tatooine.

What do you think? Is DC a good place for the Science Fiction Museum? Or what is the right place?