[High Praise! to The Looking Spoon]

(Submitted by Anonymiss of Nuking Politics [High Praise!])
Man, I wish someone had said this to me when I was in High School:
[Wil Wheaton’s response to a little girl on how to deal with being called a nerd] (Viewer #697,909)
Prior to her trip to China, Michelle Obama was told to “steer clear of human rights”.
Why? She doesn’t have to drive around what’s already under the bus.
[High Praise! to Irritable Pundit]
Come on, Right-Wing-Crony-Machine, please don’t waste the time & money on plugging for a dynastical hat-trick. Nobody wants Jeb Bush:
Dan Gainer tweeted: “Post has big article about push to nominate Jeb Bush for GOP. I won’t EVER vote for Jeb. If he gets nomination, mark me down as busy”

[High Praise! to 4of7 of Little Worlds]
It still boggles my mind how he can get such vastly different designs with such a seemingly basic technique. It’s like seeing someone draw a Mona Lisa on an Etch-a-Sketch
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Happy 75th birthday, Batman! If it's any consolation, your parents would be dead by now anyway.
— Wonderella (@wonderella) March 31, 2014
Welcome to Lots of Novocaine in Your Mouth Club. The firrst ruuuule ofnovocrnn clbbbb issttthhh jjajhagiidnzmz plubrrrrbrzzzz
— Michael (@Home_Halfway) April 1, 2014
I need to return this TV.
"Sir, that's a toaster"
I have a receipt.
"That's a napkin"
I have rights!
"You're a taco"
*taco bristles angrily*
— Blind Chow (@BlindChow) April 1, 2014
A team of biologists and engineers have successfully used nanotechnology to turn a plant into a pollutant detector.
Apparently, in the future, the expression will be “carnation in a coal mine”.
The other side is still spending millions to spread scare tactics. Fight back: http://ofa.bo/cQE
“We need to spend millions more – of their money – to scare them into silence.”
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
President Obama will help struggling Democrats get elected this fall by…
Okay, but this joke has gone on long enough.

This clown being president? That’s a joke, right? Well, it’s not funny. April Fools Day would be a good time for everyone to come clean and admit that they’ve been pulling one over on me.
I bit. I actually believed that this country could elect someone as incompetent as Barack Obama. But, I really should have known better. There’s no way Americans are that stupid. But, you got me. I fell for it. Good one.
Now, joke’s over. Let’s get back to to normal now.
Who’s Ronan Farrow?
Speak truth to power! Speak lies to weakness! Speak platitudes to the mediocre!
But have people who are predicting the GOP will win the Senate this year factored in the transformative effect of Occupy Wall Street?
So, with How I Met Your Mother, basically the actors who played the kids knew the ending for eight years.
That was a very ambitious attempt, How I Met Your Mother, but nothing can be as bad as the Lost finale.
A new report shows that 1/3 of Americans without health insurance intend to stay that way.
That’s not fair! They need to pass a law to MAKE people buy insurance.
It’s that day again, so here’s a bonus Link of the Day so you can get a jump on all the other tricksters out to get you, and get them first:
Pranklopedia: The Funniest, Grossest, Craziest, Not-mean Pranks on the Planet