Straight Line of the Day: Man has breakthrough discovery: …
Archive of entries posted on February 2023
Welcome to IMAO! Interns On Break
TripeAdvisor: NYC Hotel Names You Might Want To Know
NYC Hospitals Spending More Than $90M To House Migrants in Midtown Hotels
NY Post | February 23, 2023 | Bernadette Hogan and Bruce GoldingThe Big Apple’s public hospital system plans to spend more than $90 million to house migrants in four Midtown Manhattan hotels through the spring in response to President Biden’s border crisis, The Post has learned.
NYC Health + Hospitals CEO Mitchell Katz has approved $40 million in payments to the four-star Row NYC near Times Square and $28 million to the four-star Stewart Hotel across from Madison Square Garden, according to documents first reported by The City.
Last month, The Post revealed workers at the Row were throwing out nearly a ton of food daily because the migrants living there wouldn’t eat it.
Whistleblowing hotel employee Felipe Rodriguez also alleged that the once-trendy hotel — formerly known as the Milford Plaza, which advertised itself as the “Lullaby of Broadway” — had turned into a “free-for-all” of sex, drugs and violence.
Another $20 million is going to the Watson Hotel on West 57th Street in Hell’s Kitchen, where a group of migrants recently staged a protest against being relocated to a shelter in Brooklyn, and $5.8 million to the historic Wolcott Hotel on West 31st Street.
The planned $93.8 million in spending by H+H — which bypasses normal oversight procedures for city government contracts — follows an Oct. 13 agreement for the hospital system to manage and operate what Mayor Eric Adams calls migrant “Humanitarian Response and Relief Centers,” or HERRCs.
Last week, the seventh HERRC opened in the Wingate by Wyndham Hotel in Long Island City. The two other HERRCs are located in the Brooklyn Cruise Terminal in Red Hook and the world’s tallest Holiday Inn in Manhattan’s Financial District.
Tuna!
Straight Line of the Day: The Thing I’ve Always Wondered: …
Welcome to IMAO! I’m Sorry, I Thought You Knew I Was Joking When I Said It Was a Costume Interview
Friday Classic Funny

“Good morning Mr. Walrus. I’m afraid I have some bad news.”
“Bad news? I really don’t need any.”
“Well I got to give it to you straight. We’ve run out of our supply of Far Side.”
“Run out? How?”
“Supply chain issues I suppose. The last batch was on a train going through Ohio. Don’t know what happened to them.”
“Me neither. Well post what you got and we will have to see what we can come up with for next week.”
“Will do sir.”







Straight Line of the Day: What Changes to Heineken Can We Expect Now That Bill Gates Is Involved?
Bill Gates Buys Nearly $1B Heineken Stake, Despite Not Being a ‘Big Beer Drinker’
resistthemainstream.com | February 22, 2023 | John SymankA new report reveals that Bill Gates purchased 3.76% stake in Dutch drinks giant Heineken Holding NV last week in spite of the billionaire Microsoft founder’s previous admission that he was “not a big beer drinker.”
Gates purchased 10.8 million shares, worth $939.87 million at current market prices, triggering a disclosure requirement under Dutch stock market rules.
Straight Line of the Day: What changes to Heineken can we expect now that Bill Gates is involved?
Welcome to IMAO! Nice Try, But Roses Aren’t Going To Get You Inside Any Faster
FBI Scheduled Friday Night Check-In — On Wednesday Night! Gotcha!
Hey, fellow guys who distrust government surveillance — and what the gov’t might do as a result!
Gals, too, but all the ones I know have a badge and a weapon strapped to their thighs, and hate to be called gals, so we keep away from them. They kind of clank when they walk.
How’s that Red Wave going?
Did you know that the Washington Monument is once again open for visitors?
Why don’t you come visit, visitors? No waiting at all!! You won’t get — I have an idea; bring an American flag! — you won’t get shot this time. Honestly. We’re waving people in! Red Wave! Send the Army chick in first, if you don’t trust us.
And even if you did get in a teensy bit of trouble with our prison guards, a “speedy trial” is an eighteenth-century concept, which evolved over two thousand years of delicious experience — but over which, you know, a “living document” like the Constitution can still prevail, more certainly than your own personal constitution can. We’ve seen that. One guy committed suicide. But maybe that’s the point.
Well, Cheerios. (Oh, pro tip: they’re going to be in short supply soon. Maybe you can buy Costco-O’s.) We’ll be checking in. (I know: “Tell me something I don’t already know” . . . right?)
{Dons sunglasses, plays something from The Who.}
{Clicks on possibility of joining Lindsey Graham’s safari junket to Africa.}
{Accidentally shoots off pistol while back-flipping on disco floor.}
Criminal Wounds K-9 Officer; Dog Takes Up the Chase
From the “Criminal Masterminds” Files
Florida Man Confesses to Murder After Human Foot Found Sticking Out of His Yard: Police
Law & Crime | February 19, 2023 | Vanessa BeinA man in Florida confessed to murdering his roommate because the roommate threw the suspect’s plate full of food on the ground, according to authorities.
… Police said they were called to a house in Fort Pierce after someone said they saw blood in the back yard and what appeared to be a shallow grave.
When officers arrived on scene, they found a body somewhat buried in an 18-inch deep hole and a “foot was partially exposed.” Blood, rocks, gloves, plywood, shovels, and a blanket were collected by investigators from the yard, according to arrest records.
“Hey, Florida Dude, whatcha planting next to that human foot?”
“Rocks, gloves, plywood, shovels, a blanket . . . “
” Righteous. . . .”
” . . . and some blood.”
“Hey, wait a minute!”
Straight Line of the Day: The Only Logical Response to an Invasion of Highly Intelligent Invincible Super Pigs Is…
Highly Intelligent and Possibly Invincible Super Pigs Are Invading America
Popular Mechanics via MSN | 2/21/23 | Tim Newcomb
A special breed of hybrid super pigs from Canada have started to travel south into the northern United States.
Straight Line of the Day: The only logical response to an invasion of highly intelligent invincible super pigs is…
Welcome to IMAO! Sorry; It Is Rather Easy To Get Lost Trying To Find FrankJ’s Office
Cartoons and Memes

“Oh Mr. Walrus, so sorry to hear about Miss Welch. She will be sorely missed.”
“Thanks Miss Monroe but I am sure she will live on for us.”
“Like me?”
“Just like you.”
“That makes me happy. I’ve got some cartoons and memes from that nice Mr. Slapout, should I put them up?”
“Run ’em out Miss Monroe.”

















