I'm so sick of the polar caps. We get it. You're cold. You have penguins and Santa. What a big man you are. Let's see you grow a peach tree.
— John Cheese (@johncheese) May 19, 2014
A wax museum is a museum like potato salad is a salad.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) May 19, 2014
Luke…I am your father. I went out for cigarettes years ago (hence the voice) and I split, but now I'm back and I'd like to be in your life
— patrick (@tastefactory) May 19, 2014
Spent the last hour laughing at the thought of a dog magician saying, "Labracadabra!" Benedryl is fun.
— Shari VanderWerf (@shariv67) May 19, 2014