Straight Line of the Day: In Chicago, It’s So Cold That… Posted by Harvey on 6 January 2015, 12:00 pm Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments. In Chicago, it’s so cold that…
…they’re praying for global warming. …Jay Cutler feels right at home. …the trigger fingers of felons can’t even twitch. …politicos are considering embracing reform (for warmth). Reply to this comment
The politicians have their hands 8n their own pockets. (Old Johnny Carson joke, I think ) Reply to this comment
…Rahm Emanuel’s heart was recorded at room temperature. …criminals with their hands up were complaining that the cop’s lead wasn’t hot enough. Reply to this comment
In Chicago, it’s so cold that… it might be the Cubs year. the Politician’s Vig now includes logs. crime rates have literally frozen. Reply to this comment
…Chicago is approaching the temperature of Nancy Pelosi’s and Hillary Clinton’s teats. …Al Gore is getting excited believing it is conclusive proof of global warming. Reply to this comment
…Miley Cyrus actually put on clothes. …when police yell, “Freeze!”, the criminal really does. …they open the refrigerators and freezers to keep the house warm. Reply to this comment
…when they talk about the “Hot Time in the Old Town” they are talking about somewhere else. Reply to this comment
…Emperor Hussein Al-Barak (peace be upon him) made a special visit to enjoy that rare treat – a dogsicle. Reply to this comment
… Politicians were burning things others than government documents in their fireplaces. Reply to this comment
… the dead can only manage to get out to vote three times each instead of their usual eight. Reply to this comment
…they’re praying for global warming.
…Jay Cutler feels right at home.
…the trigger fingers of felons can’t even twitch.
…politicos are considering embracing reform (for warmth).
The politicians have their hands 8n their own pockets.
(Old Johnny Carson joke, I think )
…Rahm Emanuel’s heart was recorded at room temperature.
…criminals with their hands up were complaining that the cop’s lead wasn’t hot enough.
…the pipes at the Church of GLOBAL WARMING™ froze.
In Chicago, it’s so cold that…
it might be the Cubs year.
the Politician’s Vig now includes logs.
crime rates have literally frozen.
The frozen ground is making it hard for Rahm to dig up additional votes.
…the flag pole’s tongue sticks to you.
Soldier Field is being renamed to Lambeau South
Jay Cutler is hot in comparison… (rimshot)
…gangsters are looking forward to Valentines Day.
…Chicago is approaching the temperature of Nancy Pelosi’s and Hillary Clinton’s teats.
…Al Gore is getting excited believing it is conclusive proof of global warming.
…Miley Cyrus actually put on clothes.
…when police yell, “Freeze!”, the criminal really does.
…they open the refrigerators and freezers to keep the house warm.
. . . the tourists from Minnesota are putting jackets on
…being “put in ice” is actually a way to keep warm.
…strange things are happening on Wacker Drive.
ugh. that’s should have been put ON ice.
..Mrs. O’Leary is going to the barn to milk the cow.
…it’s starting to look like Hell froze over.
…the thermostat at the Obama house had to be turned up to 90
…when they talk about the “Hot Time in the Old Town” they are talking about somewhere else.
…Emperor Hussein Al-Barak (peace be upon him) made a special visit to enjoy that rare treat – a dogsicle.
…Jake and Elwood aren’t the only Chicagoans who are blue now.
… Politicians were burning things others than government documents in their fireplaces.
…guns won’t fire; shooters have to insert bullets manually.
The Eagles got back together
… That Democrats no longer need to put their bribes in the freezer.
… the dead can only manage to get out to vote three times each instead of their usual eight.