Scientifical Look at Liberals

Here’s yet another tiresome “scientific” study on what’s wrong with conservatives. Why do we keep getting these kind of things? Because social scientists tend to be liberals. Why is that? Has anyone ever thought to do a study of why, even though liberals are a fringe group in America at large, they tend to make up the majority of certain occupations? I guess I’m the only one who’s thought of it, but I can’t write up a long scientific study because I HAVE AN ACTUAL JOB.

And there’s the difference.

Look at the occupations that tend to be dominated by liberals: Social scientists, college professors, actors, musicians, artists. What’s similar between them all? They don’t produce anything essential. If you ran the country like a company and because of budget cutbacks you had to start laying people off, all the jobs liberals do would be the first to go. It’s nice to have actors and musicians, but we can live without them.

Liberals are an excess of civilization. You have to reach a certain level of society where useless people no longer starve to death before liberals can exist. But liberals can’t exist on their own. They need conservatives to do all the useful things needed for actual survival. Liberals need conservatives, but not the other way around.

Also, liberals have dumb monkey faces that I just want to punch.

Someone submit this to a scientific journal for me, please.

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48 Comments

  1. I can post as a faux Monkey Faced Liberal, but not as a properly-spelled Obamuhhh? Now, that’s what’s wrong with conservatives!

    Oh, well. If it brings a higher class of troll, it’s worth it.

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  2. I think it is interesting that “socially active churchgoers” were interviewed. As opposed to what…churchgoing hermits?

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  3. I just can’t believe they actually spent time on this.

    “We need more traffic! Quick, make some worthless study about conservatives and liberals! Now!”

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  4. Interesting point, Frank, but partially incorrect.

    Music is a powerful force in this world and has been for a Very long time. As far as actors, they even existed in Ancient Greece, so it would appear they are necessary. And so on with the politicians, etc. We are living in a free market, so useless things would not exist if people did not desire them; of course, if Obama is elected, I am there will be plenty useless stuff flooding our “markets” that people have no interest in. What is funny is that the acting profession would go bump if liberals had their way with socialism as people would no longer have the monetary incentive to become an actor

    Anyhow, I said partially incorrect as these studies are very biased as you said. Conservatives need to start sacrificing income and become social scientists and college professors before our young are corrupted, as is going on every day in universities. (A great friend of mine has very conservative parents, but after 4 years at UCSB, he is a liberal.) Conservatives have to begin acting or we are going to become extinct. Hence, Frank, please write some posts about this issue to better advertise it.

    -Phillip

    [Length of existence isn’t an argument of necessity. And wouldn’t the job existing in an advanced society like Ancient Greece only help prove my point? -Ed.]

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  5. “Political conservatives operate out of a fear of chaos and absence of order while political liberals operate out of a fear of emptiness,”

    This first line of the article says is all: conservativism is about being logical and liberalism is about feelings. That’s it in a nutshell.

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  6. I am a physicist currently working in academia (though thankfully not for much long). As a conservative, I am a rare breed, even among the “hard core” sciences, which are overrun by liberals. I think it partially has to do with the fact that people in academia don’t get paid well. And we all know that liberals find it “rewarding” and it allows them to “commiserate with the lower class” when they knowingly accept jobs that don’t pay well. Of course it’s all a hoax because many of the people I work with, these liberals who slave away for the betterment of society, are all trust fund babies that pockets deeper than I, the daughter of a steel worker and a teacher, could ever imagine.

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  7. Hey! I’m majoring in Psychology and I hope to become a professor someday and a (crappy) musician! Actually.. no.. you have a point… I’m unnecessary

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  8. The difference between conservatives and liberals is simple and visible on any schoolyard:

    Attempt to harrass a conservative: conservative punches you in the face. Harrassment ends, mutual respect helps bring about eventual friendship between the two parties.

    Attempt to harrass a liberal: liberal cries, runs away, tells teacher, files lawsuit, situation never resolved, whiney liberal tries to get job where he can misuse power to attempt to “get back” at everybody.

    Quite a clear distinction.

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  9. Dennis Miller once said on his show, “In my career, I’ve gotten hate mail from both sides of the fence. The main difference is that hate mail from conservatives is actually spelled correctly.”

    You are definitely on to something, Frank, but it’s even deeper than that.

    Lawyers – Originated in a Greek philosophical school that stated that opinion was more important than fact. Socrates, who loved truth, hated lawyers.

    Actors – Are paid to make illusions look real, are frequently high school drop-outs, and think they are valued when a limo from the studio picks them up at home or they are kept in a luxury trailer when the reality is that the studios learned many decades ago that the only way to get an actor to show up on time is to either never let them leave or go get them.

    College Professors – Are paid to produce words in speech and paper, often unique, with no basis in reality. You will often have a professor argue with you that there is no basis for reality. One thing to always remember:
    Legal definition of insanity – one who cannnot distinguish between right and wrong.
    Definition of post-modernism – there is no difference between right and wrong.
    Difference between the two definitions above – the prospective of the speaker. Postmodernism is insanity in the first person.

    Social Scientists – largely mocked by non-scientists and other scientists alike as being the softest of scientists, with barely a statistics class between them. A study showed that social scientists don’t consider themselves leftist, but another study showed that they pretty much all are. Unfortunately, the only ones doing social studies are social scientists, so you can pretty much throw out any validity for any such study based on prospective. Remember prospective? See Postmodernism, above.

    Artists – sometimes art is defined as a lie that tells the truth. In the case of making the three-dimensional illusion of a landscape on a two-dimensional surface, that’s quite true. There are techniques for that. However, they forget to tell you that art is often, and especially in the last 100 years, a lie that tells a lie.

    There you have it. Many categories of liberalism, and not a fact between them.

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  10. “Social Scientists – largely mocked by non-scientists and other scientists alike as being the softest of scientists, with barely a statistics class between them.”

    Honestly, at the very least, psychology gets a bum wrap, its a real science with actual uses, its a little different than other sciences because the brain is to complicated to understand bit by bit, but I’ll give you that there exists certain schools of psychology that are utter BS *cough* Freud*/cough*

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  11. It is easy. Shortly after Karl Marx “invented” communism he and his buddies decided they just didn’t want a bunch of ignorant peasants running society as a whole. Instead they wanted it ran by people of reason, and intelligence. This new bread of communism would use a new form of science, invented specifically for the task, in order to study society as a whole, so that it could provide the leaders with the raw information they needed to make decisions for society as a whole. This new science was called sociology. The communistic system it would be used to run would be called socialism. At least this is what my Sociology professor taught me, using a sociology book. Both also tried to pass a large number of urban legends off as facts, so the whole thing could be a bunch of nonsense. Strangely she was the only person I ever met who seriously and openly thought communism was a swell idea.

    So in the end, to want to be a sociologist, you probably are doing it in order to help bring about and run socialism. It figures that a conservative would not have any interest in doing so.

    P.S. I only took the class because I wanted to use sociological methods of study against liberals. I soon found them to rarely use the scientific model, and instead rely mostly on testimonial evidence better known as urban legends.

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  12. First, great post. It’s funny cuz it’s true.

    I also have to say I love this quote from that article
    The study findings may shed light on why conservatives prefer more authoritarian leaders while liberals do not, he adds.

    Now that’s funny. You know they’re talking about Bush but they can’t come out and say it.
    And, as everybody knows, the left hates authoritarian dictators. Well, except for Chinese commies and Fidel and Che and Stalin and Lenin and Chavez and….
    Which dictators do they hate? Hitler, but only after he invaded Russia, and, of course, Pinochet. That dastard actually killed all the commies in his country before leaving office. What nerve! Everybody knows, he should have been a murderous commie instead of murdering commies.

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  13. Phillip defends musicians as an old profession: TRUTH? They treated entertainers of all types more appropriately in the past. They treated them as play acting rubes with a low status and low pay. They were itinerate and this illustrates they were considered of less value than our society assigns to migrant farm workers.

    Lynn the Phemale Physicist. I want your email address. Women in the hard sciences are sexy!

    Liberals invent causes to make their largely irrelevant underclass underlings feel relevant in a world that is increasingly technical and increasingly globalized. Fact is the more intelligent you are the more you tend towards liberTarian ideal. That is to say ultra conservative. Sure there are some rich people who portray themselves as liberals / democrats / socialist / communist but that is all about getting what they want. If it was genuine liberalism why do they have any money left ? There is no law against giving it away!

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  14. It is also true that liberals by and large have no concept of a higher power. They refuse to believe in anything that they cannot see or control or experience. God can not be real because “no one” read no liberal, has seen him, talked to him or gotten him to do something for them. Everything that happens, that is good, is done because some liberal somewhere didn’t bathe today or ate raw grains or aborted a fetus. Everything bad is because, God, who they don’t believe in, is sticking it to conservatives because they’re evil.

    Seriously look at the list of occupations in the post. Is there any one job there where the majority of people believe in something besides government and how it should run our lives. If government runs the lives of it’s people no one has to make any of those pesky choices, no one is allowed to progress, everyone is equal (miserable, depressed, and bored-but equal).

    Maybe it’s time to secede from the US. All conservatives into the middle and we’ll let the nut-jobs on both coasts slip into anarchy. We’ll have all the guns so it will be ok. We’ll also have all the cattle, wheat, and various sundry other things. Cotton my be hard to come by but there are always those willing to sell for the right price. I like it.

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  15. Phillip wrote, “Conservatives need to start sacrificing income and become social scientists and college professors before our young are corrupted, as is going on every day in universities.”
    I am JUST that conservative college professor. Just today in my business class, I discussed with my students the current financial crisis, articulating what I felt was a fair perspective of specific components that led us to this precipice. I am sponsoring a Students for McCain group on campus, and tonight we’ll have a debate watching party with the Obama students. (I just hope they know how to behave themselves in public.) I’ll let you know how it goes.
    Yes, it’s pretty lonely there in the office suite with the libs all around me.

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  16. As a conservative musician, I disagree that music is nonessential.

    But it does get rather annoying being surrounded by so many liberals.

    Also, why the hell is there a red Christmas tree with arms and a face next to my post?

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  17. Folks like AR, Swamper and me must absolutely confound sociologists. After all, how can the “creative class” be anything but liberal. It’s just unnatural. The truth, I think, is that we have enough emotion to be creative and enough control over our emotions to let logic and reason reign.

    Must be scary as hell for all those pure emotive types. Excellent. Heh.

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  18. Freemon,

    You are forgetting one thing about actors (as did I in my original post) – they usually subsidized their meager earnings as actors with prostitution. Considering female actors are a fairly recent invention, historically speaking, you get the gist.
    Also, when Jesus said, “Woe to you scribes and Pharisees! Hypocrites!” The word hypocrite did not have its modern meaning. It was the Greek word for “Actor”, and it took on that meaning after Jesus used it in this context. Hypocrite is defined as “someone who pretends to be good, but isn’t”.

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  19. Have you ever noticed how many engineers and scientists are also good musicians? Sometimes, even writers? Maybe it’s that old left brain, right brain thing. Personally, I have a battle going on between imagination and logic all the time. Logic’s role is to embrace the imaginable and tame it by making it a reality.

    Oh, and seanmahair, that gravatar is SO not you! Get busy and create something beautiful!

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  20. It is interesting that people who can’t hunt, fish, or build anything often cite “productivity” or “utility” when determining whether ill, unborn, and disabled people should be allowed to live.

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  21. As a liberal I thought I would stop by and say most of these studies are spot on and it is true that you are all a bunch of lying f*cking cowards. The science is indisputable. Go f*ck yourselves but please DO NOT f*ck each other because we don’t need you idiots reproducing.

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  22. Another way of looking at this study is that conservatives can recognize danger and liberals can’t.

    P.S.
    Hey what is up with all the trolls. The new website comments are just full of them.

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  23. Master Shake – there you go. LiberalDood is here. That Dood is definitely a higher class of troll, dontcha think?

    Dood, have a seat. Someone will be along in a few minutes to measure your feet. We have dozens of beautiful troll shoe styles to pick from. May I suggest “Dorkwad” today?

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  24. Hey what is up with all the trolls. The new website comments are just full of them.

    Part of Obamuhh’s “get in their faces” directive involves the trolls being paid in crack cocaine directly from The One’s stash. You can tell how much liberals love crack based on the intellect and education reflected in their posts.

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  25. Good Lord. If LiberalDood is high-class…

    Well-thought-out, well-executed, and well-stated study on your part, in my opinion. Much more applicable to daily life than most of the crud I end up having to read.

    Cheers, my (necessary) friends. Oh, and hang in there, Lynn. It’s good to have one of our own kind in on all that ‘nookyuler’ research stuff, you know?

    Gotta go work at my real job now. Later.

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  26. Misha, aren’t you high enough on the crack that Obamuhhh gave you that you can take a break from trolling for a while? Although, a fatal overdose wouldn’t be the worst thing you could do for humanity.

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  27. I believe the studies that show liberals are smarter are the correct studies. You can’t deny science. I’m tired of your people’s fake feminism. Take your lipstick and shove it up your arses.

    [What lipstick? What feminism? Do you guys even know how to read?

    Incidentally, another Chicago IP. -Ed.]

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  28. I think the people with the dumb monkey faces in need of punching are the bloggers of this blog. You\’d be surprised at how hard some liberals can punch and you\’d be surprised at how often the chickenhawk republicans turn and run because they are cowards. I suspect the bloggers of this blog and many of the readers here are the cowardly type.

    [If you look at polling, liberals are either women or extremely effeminate men. It’s a scientific fact.

    Then again, people who obsess over politics tend to be geeks. -Ed.]

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  29. Veeshir beat me to it. The quote does reveal an astounding level of bias:

    The study findings may shed light on why conservatives prefer more authoritarian leaders while liberals do not, he adds.

    That’s like asking Frank J. if he’s stopped beating his wife yet. It is a logical fallacy, and these bozos can’t even see their own outrageous bias.

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  30. Marko! I always suspected the Tom Clancy connection to your handle. Now it is confirmed.

    Thingsh in there don’t react well to bulletsh

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  31. But if they punched someone they might break and nail and we all know how painful that can be. Not to mention unsightly. I love Brad Paisleys new song “I’m still a Guy”. It describes “real men” to me.

    “With all of these guys lining up to get neutered
    It’s hip now to be feminized
    I don’t highlight my hair
    I still got a pair
    Honey I’m still a guy

    My eyebrows ain’t plucked
    There’s a gun in my truck
    Oh thank God, I’m still a guy”

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  32. I think the whole problem either way is being condescending to the other side, whether we’re conservatives and they’re liberals or we’re liberals and they’re conservatives. But it is true, conservatism is a masculine thing, liberalism a feminine.

    Perhaps a better study would be to figure out how to live with people of the other/wrong viewpoint and how to put them to productive use.

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  33. Veeshir Said:

    Which dictators do they hate? Hitler, but only after he invaded Russia, and, of course, Pinochet. That dastard actually killed all the commies in his country before leaving office. What nerve! Everybody knows, he should have been a murderous commie instead of murdering commies.

    And Generalisimo Francisco Franco (who, in tones of amazed wonderment the press reminded us on the MSM every night for a month is still dead). Franco foiled the innocent Spanish Communistas from their attempt to turn Spain into a socialist paradise, so he was uncompromisingly evil. When he finally died (back in the dark ages of the ’70s), his death was the lead story on all 3 (!) networks, every night, ad nauseum. It was so bad that even the well known conservatives at Saturday Night Live noticed it and turned it into a running gag on Chevy Chase’s news report. “And this just in from Madrid: Generalisimo Francisco Franco is still dead..” It’s still funny for those of us old enough to remember Cronkhite and Rather’s subliminal socialist “reporting.”

    And how come I don’t get a cool icon next to my post?!

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  34. ThunderThor;
    Wal said it first, but I’ll elaborate.
    I’ve got a magic hammer like Majolner.
    Everytime I throw it, it destroys what I aimed it at and then returns to my hand faster than the eye can follow.
    I can throw it up to 8 times in 1.5 seconds and yes, it makes a sound like thunder!

    If you really, really, Really want a demonstration, I’ll oblige you.
    Bring your friends.
    It’s all just paperwork to me!

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