Yakko’s Bailout


And now, Yakko Warner explains the bailout…


The U.S. economy’s tanked. It’s beyond me
Why nobody knows who’s to blame.
When Washington’s involved, the markets will devolve;
The reason is always the same.


In ’94, sub-prime mortgages were five
Percent of all housing loans, but,
The number then went up to 20 percent
Due to a perceived housing glut.


In ’99 Clinton, with impeachment defended,
Told Fannie Mae, “You must give loans
To those that don’t qualify, ’cause I must mollify
All those that kept me afloat.”


Franklin Raines took over Fannie Mae’s books over
Judgment that was good and true.
The books he did cook, and ’twas millions he took
Ere away to retirement he flew.


Freddie Mac, also, backed loans that were awful
But banks went along for the ride
With creative accounting while debts were amounting
To billions they tried hard to hide.


Freddie and Fannie gave thousands in money
To those overseeing this mess.
To Chris Dodd, John Kerry, Obama. Yes, very
Suspicious, to put it the best.


And now, Lordy Mama, advising Obama
Is none other than Franklin Raines.
With speeches a-plenty, but meaning that’s empty,
Barack’s “change” sounds more like “the same.”


In 2008, the strain couldn’t wait
And Freddie and Fannie both fell.
The government leapt in, took over and stepped in
A hand basket heading to hell.


“The upcoming debate, well, you know it can wait,”
Said John McCain. “Let’s all go back
To D.C. and huddle, and fix all this muddle.”
But the train was too far off the tracks.


The debate, it went on, and though nobody won,
The Congress could not pass a bill.
Pelosi’s speech tanked it, although Barney Frank went
“Don’t blame us on Capitol Hill.”


The Republicans cast blame, the Democrats did same,
And nobody knows what event
Will help with this crisis, though Obama’s advisors
Say “Show up and then vote ‘present.'”


The market dropped hundreds, the pols, they do blunders
Of bills that will just make it worse.
The good news is one day, it will all be okay,
And history will write the last verse.

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36 Comments

  1. That…was…awesome. I’ve never seen somebody do so well at explaining this whole mess without seeming boring (except my local talk radio host Jaz McKay.) I hope all the “this is just Bush’s fault” people learn to follow the money and realize who benefited from all this and continues to do so…

    *cough*
    OBAMA
    *cough*

    [Ed: Thank you very much. -B]

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  2. While I disagree with this partially incomplete explanation that lets Bush and the GOP off the hook for our economic woes I applaud you for using Yakko!

    [Ed: When I grow up, I want to be Yakko Warner. – B]

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  3. Very funny but I’m a little concerned that Yakoo seems so excited that we have a credit crisis. I’m also worried that Palin is not being used enough and locked away by mean John McCain. Free Sarah Palin!

    [Ed: Yakko’s excited about telling people who don’t understand the crisis about the crisis. He’s not worried about Palin. In fact, Palin is off-topic. Yakko doesn’t like that. – B]

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  4. You left out all the stuff about the unregulated derivatives market. You think you know what you saying but you don’t. You are just a right wing clown. I’ll call you Bozo the Puke instead of Basil. It’s more fitting. Email me if you disagree: blergh@blergh.com

    [Ed: Hey, that’s great! Maybe my application to Clown College will be accepted. Put in a good word for me, will ya? – B]

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  5. Basil, Welcome to IMAO from someone who has been lurking behind the scene for the last year. Each and every day I get up and can’t wait to see what everyone is writing about. I also enjoy everyone who writes in this blog, (except the trolls do get a bit tedious at times). So welcome aboard and I await more hilarious stuff from you guys!!!

    [Ed: Thanks! But if Frank J. ever figures out where he put the keys to this place, my butt will be tossed out with the garbage. – B]

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  6. Hilarious! See it’s not because of tax cuts and wealthy people. I hate these poor and middle class freaks. If you are poor or middle class don’t complain just work harder and get a better job. F**king lazy mofos who complain they aren’t rich. Thank god for George Bush and John McCain for having some common sense.

    [Ed: Yeah, being rich rulez!! I enjoy getting up in the morning and spitting on all the illegal immigrants that I have shining my shoes, cooking my meals, and wiping my butt. Life’s good. – B]

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  7. Oh good I new there was an easy explanation for why inflation is out of control, the country has been losing jobs month after month, why gas prices have soared and for why the dollar is weak. Oh wait this has nothing to do with any of that – guess it still really is George Bush fault and you are one of those retarded right wing a**holes who defends everything George Bush does. Get a life you pathetic loser!

    [Ed: Glad you liked it. Thanks. – B]

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  8. Thank you Basil! I also could sing it along with the actual song…AND my three year old peeking over my shoulder was very excited about seeing Yakko on the computer:) Yeah, I’m raising my kids on the classics:)

    [Ed: Thanks! You’re a wise, wise parent. Oh, and I was excited when Animaniacs came available for the iPod. Now, I have Yakko, Wakko, and Dot with me anywhere I go! – B]

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  9. Animaniacs is considered classic now?? I was 9 or so when that came out.

    Man I am getting old… I remember Fragile Rock and Reading Rainbow. Those were my classics.

    Ohh and good job Basil.

    [Ed: Thank you so much. – B]

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  10. [Ed: Since Article I, Section 7 says “All bills for raising revenue shall originate in the House of Representatives,” they must have figured out a way to do it that won’t involve raising any money from me and you. – B]’

    You’re wrong again. It’s becoming a certainty we can count on.

    The Senate voted reluctantly but solidly in favor of a modified $700-billion Wall Street rescue plan Wednesday, but it remained uncertain whether the legislation — even with a carefully designed package of tax breaks — would withstand the fierce crosswinds of liberal and conservative resistance in the House later this week.

    http://www.latimes.com/business/investing/la-fi-bailout2-2008oct02,0,1307485.story

    [Ed: So, they took up the SAME bill that already originated in the House (and not a new bill) amended it, then passed it … consistent with with the Constitution? – B]

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  11. … Faboo… Richard Stone would be proud.

    Now I REALLY want to see Yakko perform this! *thinks* Oh Yakko…

    Yakko: Already on it! What’s the tune?

    … What IS the tune? Uh, try the Mexican Hat Dance! Or, get Wakko, I bet he can come up with something!
    Expect a video next week. 😉

    *piano crashes*

    Wakko: Oops…

    Uh… maybe a couple weeks…

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