Straight Line of the Day: Prediction – On Day One of Obama’s Second Term…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Prediction – on day one of Obama’s second term…

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49 Comments

  1. New National Anthem


    Get up in the morning, slaving for bread, sir,
    so that more can go to the Fed.
    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    Get up in the morning, slaving for bread, sir,
    so that more can go to the Fed.
    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    A wife and a kids, need universal health care.
    ‘More Taxes,’ he says, ‘I’ll need to receive.’
    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    credit him a-tear up, the bailout’s all gone.
    Now you gonna end up in a socialist slide.*
    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    It’s getting warm, we have done some harm
    The globe is outta norm. Gore sounds the alarm.
    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    (repeat last four stanzas again)

    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    For, O bama’s right. Aah.

    (Israelites — Desmond Dekker)

    OK, so I wrote this one a while ago, and nobody seems to know who Desmond Dekker was, but
    they do play him on margaritaville radio once in a while.

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  2. .. as the Chicago rotary president, he again insists on a press conference and 40-minute speech; just like the good old days.

    … Thanks her husband for leading the way.

    … he was denied early parole and sentenced to serve out the remainder of his 15-years.

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  3. Prediction – on day one of Obama’s second term…

    The Muslims decide that they can actually live at peace with Israel after all, the Irish swear off whiskey and burn down the Guinness factory, number one ally China helps the U.S. bust a bunch of international bootleggers and counterfeiters, and Spock decides to shave his goatee.

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  4. Obama invites Dana Carvey to the White House. Everyone does the Church Lady’s I’m So Superior dance.

    The Obamas have a feast. In unrelated news, the stray dog population in Washington DC decreases.

    Chris Matthews checks into a hospital due to lack of blood in the upper half of his body.

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  5. … the Irish swear off whiskey and burn down the Guinness factory.

    Erm…Guinness is NOT a whiskey factory. Whiskey is made in distilleries , beer, such as Guinness, is gently crafted in a brewery.

    There. Sorted.

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  6. …he continues with his policy of opening up the Gulf for drilling and finishing the Keystone pipeline. He signs a bill to further strengthen the work requirement for welfare. He spends 5 hours meeting with his National Security Team and decides to continue arming Iranian Democratic Freedom fighters to further the goal of collapsing the regime. That evening he visits the White House barber to have his goatee trimmed.
    (NOTE: He only gets a second term in a bizarro alternate universe)

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  7. …he meets with his cabinet and…heh, thought this was gonna be a fantasy scenario didn’t you?

    …he fulfills a promise and declares skanks a recognized minority and must be given hiring priority status.

    …actually engenders goodwill of everyone by leaving Guantanamo open and closing Michael Bay.

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  8. CarolyntheMommy gets the paperwork in for her baby’s passport so she can move Down Under as soon as it comes in.

    CarolyntheMommy’s neighbors come running to her house to investigate repeated, loud noises only to find that it’s Carolyn repeatedly banging her head on the table going, “Why? Why? WHYYYYYYYY?”

    Free abortions for everyone!

    The golf channel will premier a show: Putting with the Pres

    The crescent goes atop the Capitol dome

    … I’ll go into hibernation until 2016

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  9. …a Mayan high priest announces someone forgot to carry the 1, so the end of the world will take place a month later than expected.

    …Obama announces he has brokered a seven-year peace treaty between Israel and the muslim world.

    …A victory feast! -Say, has anyone seen Bo? He couldn’t have gotten far with all the weight he’s put on since November…

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  10. … the Irish swear off whiskey and burn down the Guinness factory.

    Yeah, those are two separate thoughts. What’s Ireland known for (besides potatos, Catholics, and red heads)? Drunks, Guinness beer, and Irish whiskey. And on the large scale production that Guinness annually puts out, I feel comfortable calling it a factory as opposed to a brewery.

    See, in the alternate universe where Obama is reelected, the Irish will give up their Guinness and their whiskey. But if I have to explain it, it’s not as funny…

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  11. @30. DamnCat: Tuna to you…It is absolutely scary to consider that as of tomorrow, B.Hussein O. might rule this country at will; no longer concerned about having to run for re-election…What fury might he unleash on the adoring public ??!

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  12. … Everyone who voted against him suddenly vanishes from the Earth, leaving only those who voted for him, those who didn’t care enough to get out and vote at all, and all the poor foreign slubs who don’t get to vote … Left Behind!

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  13. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

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