The Italian government has passed a new anti-corruption law.
Now people have to bribe their legislators just to get them to accept a bribe.
Archive of entries posted on 7th November 2012
Still Playing Obama’s Game
Same Old Song
Surprise, surprise. Al Gore blamed Hurricane Sandy on global warming.
So predictable. Al Gore is like listening to Beethoven’s 5th played on a triangle.
You’ve Been Judged!
Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “Breaking News! Found inside a voting booth…”
Click here to see if you made the cut.
If you did, you should probably email him about becoming a guest blogger there.
If you didn’t, he’s got another straight line for you to practice on.
Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.
FOUND! The Bucket Obama Keeps Getting His Head Stuck In
Link of the Day: Grandmother Had a Shotgun
[High Praise! to The Real Revo]
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
A Moment With Joe Biden: No More Moments With Joe Biden
Son of Bob sent me an email explaining why he’s chosen to retire this much-beloved feature:
I had pretty much planned on doing a final “Biden moment” today, to close out the running gag, but opted not to. When Joe Biden is a gaffe machine that the Dems are treating like the crazy uncle, the Biden moments are funny. But, when Biden and Obama are being commended for a “brilliant” campaign, Biden’s ridiculous statements move from humorous to tragic. Obviously, IMAO giving readers a reason to laugh at this administration is probably more important now than ever. However, to try to create something humorous about Joe Biden today just feels like trying to make jokes about your aunt that just died last night…too soon.
These will be missed.
Son of Bob, if you ever feel inspired to write on a different theme, drop me a line. You’ve got good comedy chops.
Wisdom of the Day: Ohio Brooks Michelle Fantasy
I’m calling Ohio for Romney. (Trying to get my friend Bill Romney in Cleveland on the phone.)
— Andy Levy (@andylevy) November 7, 2012
David Brooks is very sensible for a pumpkin with glasses.
— BillCorbett (@BillCorbett) November 7, 2012
GLASS HALF-FULL: Think of all the local and foreign economies that will benefit from Michelle’s second term vacations.
— Laura Ingraham (@IngrahamAngle) November 7, 2012
I’m winning in my fantasy election league.
— Jon Friedman (@friedmanjon) November 7, 2012
I Always Wondered What Happened to That Kid
[High Praise! to Theo Spark]
I’m fairly certain that’s the same Timmy O’Toole who fell down a well in Springfield back in 1992 and inspired an all-star celebrity benefit video called “We’re Sending Our Love Down the Well.”
I Turn 35 in 2014 So…
Constitutionally eligible, baby!
Frank J. for President 2016
“Stop whining and solve your own problems.”
I want to get in the government so I can tear that mother down. And I want the power of the presidency so I can get rid of it. My goal as president will be that at least half the population will be unable to name me because I’ll stick to my stuff and you’ll stick to yours and we’ll get along just fine that way.
Not sure how one formally starts a campaign, but we can all get working on this now.
Straight Line of the Day: Just After Winning, Obama…
With a Smile on Your Face or Not at All
My philosophy is that anything beyond your daily bread is a luxury, and from that perspective we live a very rich and luxurious life here in the United States of America. Nothing guarantees that will continue, though, and no one owes it to us. I say this not because I think we will suffer great loss, but we often get so caught up in thinking of what we can lose that we don’t appreciate all the blessing we have. It is very easy to be a miserable billionaire. But that shouldn’t be us. We have so many luxuries, so many opportunities in this country, that we should always have a smile on our faces. If we keep perspective. And we need to hold tightest to the things that can never be taken away from us: Our principles.
Anyway, the election… it was disappointing. But one of the great foolishnesses the left believes and that the right needs to avoid is that you change the country at the ballot box. They think they can elect the right people and they’ll drag everyone to their view. That was the attempt with ObamaCare and other left-wing ideas forced on the country. We have to be smarter than that. This is a country where the government serves the people — not where it molds them. To effect change in government, we as a people must change first.
So how do we change the country? We have to forget about politics, because politics is small and insignificant and America needs to be a place of big ideas and grander things. One of the defining characteristics of a conservative is that we have many, many things in our lives much more important than politics. Family. Careers. Religion. Politics is but a bump in the road compared to those things.
So if we want a better government, we need to be a better people. And you don’t get to be a better people focusing on tiny things like politics. Instead, we need to build people on the important things and the politics will come naturally. I think a good example is Dave Ramsey. He’s on a crusade to get individuals out of debt and get them to rely on themselves and their own finances for retirement. He doesn’t talk politics, but when people have learned to rely on themselves and not government, do you think they’re going to vote for people asking to confiscate their wealth for empty promises of false security? As I’ve said, give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll stop voting Democrat.
We can’t be people who think conservatism is just a neat political idea; we have to be people who feel liberty is the true security down to the bone. And we have to build up others around us to feel that to. The culture is the battlefield, and actions speak much louder than any media can. That is where we must focus. If we want a better government, we all must be better people.
It won’t be an easy journey. It’s not like we lost our way just recently. It started in the beginning of last century when the federal government began to guarantee people’s individual security, i.e., making sweet promises it’s too inept to keep. How do we get away from that mentality? Who knows. It would be unprecedented, which is why I’ve always thought “classical liberal” is a better label for us than “conservative.” We’re supporting radical ideas of liberty that have never been achieved before. And they’re still scary to many people. Which is why we need to be a stronger people. Independent people who all truly believe they can best take care of themselves. And only then can we work together to achieve greatness like this world has never known.
So that’s what we’re working for. And if you can’t do it with a smile on your face, then I recommend giving up worrying about politics altogether, as it is not worth the aggravation. We have to continue forward with hope — not hope in some government or idiot bureaucrats, but hope in each other and our abilities.
So, in summary, I don’t do being all dour and sad. Many have worked hard and even died to give us all the opportunities and luxuries we have now. Let’s take advantage of them and not be a bunch of whiny sissies about all this.
We good? Let’s get to work.
Biden Speaks on the Election
Random Thoughts: Thoughts From Before the Calamity
Please don’t announce on Twitter what happens in the election; I’m DVRing it to watch tomorrow.
Some people like liberty. Other people are like, “That sounds hard.” But we can all work together. Or one work for the other, at least.
I don’t see any scenario in which Romney wins unless he gets more votes than Obama in key states.
I’ve been engaging in the oldest and most reliable form of voter suppression: shoving people down wells.
Can’t you little Commies go buy your own “I Voted” sticker instead of making the government hand them out using my tax dollars?
I just realized that thing where you push a button and someone you don’t know dies but you get $1 million is a great govt spending metaphor.
Well, voting went horrible. I found out Raul Labrador isn’t my rep and I didn’t get to vote for him in his first reelection.
Oh, he was my rep, but they moved the district line and I now literally live just a couple yards into district 2.
Well, my day is ruined. Idaho district 2 sucks, and now I’m in it. Hope the day goes better for the rest of you.
The only competitive things in Idaho are these Props 1,2,and 3. Don’t know anything other than teachers’ unions oppose, so voted for them.
Aw man. I share my district with those Sun Valley snobs.
What? Congressman Mike Simpson has a blue check mark on Twitter and way less followers than me? Do you automatically get one if you’re elected to national office? So how hard is it to get elected to national office? I really want a blue check mark.
Didn’t know drawing the two districts in Idaho was contentious. If you want them to stay red, just make sure they include Idaho.
After the election is over, we need to replay it 1000 more times to test how accurate Nate Silver’s model was.
Buttercup demanded my “I Voted” sticker 🙁
If voting lines seem long, remember that Nate Silver says Obama has a 90% chance of winning so if you were voting for Obama, don’t bother.
Let’s all get to bed early and then wake up refreshed to find out who is president.
Keep a look out for musician and Hollywood actor endorsements if you want to know how people dumber and more arrogant than you are voting.
My best case scenario is a big Romney victory and then Obama throwing a huge tantrum in his concession speech.
Democrats best hope is a rerun (with parties reversed) of 2004, though some Republicans still hoping this is a 1980.
My inside sources are telling me it’s looking pretty certain Romney will carry Idaho.
I’m not really prepared for either outcome.
I wish Andrew Breitbart was around today to cause trouble 🙁
If Romney wins, he should consider it a mandate and have the military seize and imprison all Democrat politicians. He could put them in Gitmo which Obama conveniently kept open.
If Romney wins, I’m going to gloat so horribly. And if Obama wins, I’m going to act so blasé about it.
Exit polls consistently over-represent people who are exiting.
Exit polls tend to under-represent the right since they often burrow out of the voting booth.
Got word from an unnamed Republican that he has problems registering for lots of simple things due to lack of name.
Also, this unnamed Republican tells me he hates being just called, “Hey you!” but that aren’t a lot of other options.
“My parents may have neglected to give me a name, but I know one thing: I vote GOP.” -unnamed Republican
My dream is to one day vote for president and then never hear about the guy again until the next election.
“I’ll take a nap and let you solve your own damn problems.” -my vow for day one of my presidency
Oh yeah, the Supreme Court. If Obama wins, I hope all the conservative judges are okay with not dying for four more years.
I like that a lot of polling places are churches. People are less likely to vote Democrat if they think Jesus is watching.
I thought we were told the Republican Congress was record unpopular?
If it’s not a Romney landslide, I’m not interested. Had to be a major rebuke to Obama.
No matter who you’re rooting for, the new Bond movie is supposed to be good so it should be a decent week.
So Obama to continue on as he does, a Republican House to block him, and a Democrat Senate to not pass a budget. #StatusQuo
Man is the president in 2016 going to have a big mess he inherited to whine about.
New Hampshire called for Obama. I thought “Live Free or Die” had an obvious answer, but people surprise you.
“Live Free or Free Stuff”
Trying to think of where to go from “Obama: The Greatest President in the History of Everything” to title my next book…
Doesn’t the GOP have a great lineup for the 2016 presidential race? Makes you optimistic for the future!
Hopefully this will all be wrapped up tonight so Obama tomorrow can get right back to whining about Republicans blocking his plans.
People say the economy will eventually collapse if we keep heaping on debt, but there’s only way to really find that out.
I’m really tired of the party of Bill Clinton pretending they care about rape.
I despise Elizabeth Warren. Very few more dishonest than rich people who rant against rich people.
So, results seem to be that most Americans think we’re on the wrong path and want to keep everything basically the same.
Republicans seem to be keeping their House gains from 2010 if that’s much of prize.
Worst. President. Reelected. Ever.
My advice: Exercise and eat well every day. It will be the strong who get to rebuild things after the collapse.