I like the Navy. Two thirds of the world is covered in water, and who will kill people on that? They Navy, of course. The Marines can’t handle it as they are unable to walk on water. And, even if the Marines had magical water walking shoes, water is a rugged terrain with no cover to duck behind. Luckily the Navy is used to this. Thus, they have big ships with giant guns. They can sit out in the water and pound the land with their big guns. The foreigners will be like, “What’s that? Is it the wrath of God?” No, it’s the Navy. Also, the Navy has nuclear weapons.
Don’t mess with the Navy.
Right now, there is a fund-raiser for Project Valour-IT which provides voice-controlled laptop computers to wounded Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen and Marines recovering from hand and arm injuries or amputations at home or in military hospitals. Hopefully, they’ll also give them to our illiterate troops, as many troops are illiterate because they are quite dumb as John Kerry tactfully pointed out.
In this fundraiser, the three branches of the military and the Air Force are competing in fundraising. I was asked by Chaotic Synaptic Activity to help with the Navy. I agreed since my roommate in college was in the Navy and he drove me to Sears to buy a new car battery when my old one died. So far, the combined effort of the Army, Air Force, and the Marines has never gotten me to Sears.
So, give money to help our wounded troops, and do it in the name of the Navy!
They are behind the others right now, which is bad because they can nuke everyone.
If you must give in the name of another branch, though, Blackfive is the Army (lazy drunkards) leader, Villainous Company is the Marine (score nearly as well as chimps on standardized tests) leader, and Op-For is the Air Force (the military’s golf team) leader. I wouldn’t give money through them, though, as they are all worse than pedophiles (was that okay, or did I overstep the bounds of friendly competition?).
So, make your tax deductible donation using the button above to help our wounded troops and to show your support of our God-like Navy.
Good for you Frank! I’m donating money to give a voice-activated computer to a wounded member of the military. Anything we can do to help these brave people–I just hope they are smart enough to figure out how to use it–you know–
Oh yeah! Don’t forget we have stealthy submarines, better uniforms and the SEASL.
I know, they are just killers in speedos and sunglasses…
Yeah, but didn’t the Village People write a song about them?
Both my grandfathers served in the Navy. Don’t eff with the Navy!!
(BTW, my paternal grandfather won the “Rattle Battle” at the NRA National Championship (Camp Perry) in the 60s. Definitely don’t eff with him!)
You had better hope nobody tells Joe Foo that you are backing the Navy.
Damn right FrankJ! If you don’t donate to the Navy I’ll haunt you from here to eternity! Ha Ha! Here to Etermity, get it! I may be a worm infested corpse but I can still kid with the best of them. Donate now and donate often. Dismissed!
Anyone who donates to the Navy will receive a nekkid picture of me!
Not only can the Navy (which I am a part of, active duty) nuke something, we can do it with the comfort of air conditioning too, and we smell better because we have showers too lol…
Dude, whatever, the AF can jump in a bomber here, fly around the world, nuke a bunch of stuff and fly back. Plus we have all the ICBM sites. And I spent a week on a Navy ship – it sucked. The AC was broken and the showers were crap.
“Blackfive is the Army (lazy drunkards) leader”
HEY! We are NOT lazy….
“the three branches of the military and the Air Force”
Oh, that’s classic.
“The only traditions of the Royal Navy are rum, sodomy and the lash” Sir Winston Churchill.
As this old Squid can attest, You are correct John Kerry, and we know the Lash was your favorite.
Yeah, Frank.
The Marines know what to call the Navy….
[drum roll…]
“Taxi!”
Heh.
Writer, I would have guessed “sodomy” myself, based on his, erm, behavior with the other John during the 2004 campaign. Nothing like a hearty kiss to get the mental images churning – and the stomach.
Done! Don’t really care what on what branch’s behalf I made the donation. All our servicemen are outstanding, courageous individuals and deserve the best.
frank, the Army didn’t make my brother a drunk, being Irish did that all by itself.
bid you and yours peace love and understanding
ceann rua
God Bless the Navy. One of the few branches in which Nuclear arms are standard load.
I’d like to use those arms to hug the Islamic world.
One nice big, warm, several thousand degree hug. 🙂
Love the snarks….and, if you want AC, go to a “small boy,” not a CV…
Speaking of “Small Boys,” check out what’s going to go up for auction:
“No Higher Honor”
And Cassandra: We call Marines “Dance Partners!”
you are dead to me. >: (
(oh, just remembered, rto’s brother was in the Navy, so, maybe, just maybe, you live.)
Ahh, submarines. What other craft can go down with 120 men and come back up with 60 happy couples?
Don’t forget, the Navy takes the Marines to where there are people that need to be killed. Oorah and all that.
Once upon a time when we still had Marines on carriers to guard special weapons which I can neither confirm nor deny the presence of, we had a high level visitor. The POOD (Petty Officer Of the Deck) welcomed him aboard and gestured to the Marine in full dress blues, saying “The bellboy will get your bags Sir”.
(take THAT, Cassandra!)
Yeah, great work Frank! My brother and sister were both in the Navy (I’m apparently some cowardly, USA hating, land-lubbing runt of the litter).