Quincy, IL (AP) – Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama has given hands-on help in a flood zone in Illinois. He helped locals in the town of Quincy to fill sandbags to place on the banks of the Mississippi river, which is swelling to dangerous levels.

“Gimme my shovel back, ya starched-shirt photo-poser!””

“Today I’m acting in my role as a fellow citizen to help those in need,” said Obama. “Sometimes you have to set politics aside and do the work that needs to be done.”
Robert “Rusty” Jones, leader of the local Red Cross chapter and supervisor of the sandbagging project, was grateful for the Illinois Senator’s help. “Well, he DID pick up a shovel eventually, and actually put some sand in a couple bags. Gotta give him credit for that much. Mostly he just pranced around & got his picture took, though. And would ya think one of them strapping Secret Service guys could pick up a shovel? ‘Bout as useful as a porcupine in a lifeboat.”
Obama said: “Since I’ve been involved in public office we’ve not seen this kind of devastation.” He pledged to push federal and state governments to provide aid to the affected areas.
“Well,” said Rusty, “we don’t need ‘aid’ so much as people who bring their own damn shovels & work gloves. Big Tom over there owns the Ace Hardware in town, and he brought every digger & mitt he had in stock. All Barry’s entourage brought was a whole bunch of standin’ around & gettin’ in the way.”
Mr Obama had been scheduled to campaign in nearby Iowa, but that state is also badly affected by flooding and he did not want to draw government resources away from battling the problems.
“Hope Iowa’s ‘government resources’ don’t take as many sit-downs & smoke breaks as ours did,” said Rusty.
[Hat tip: Paul Abrams]