Archive of entries posted on 18th March 2010

Damage control

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Mr. President, we need to schedule another interview.


What do you mean, Rahm? I was just on Fox News.


Honestly, that didn’t go to well. We need another to do damage control.


Yeah, that Brent fellow wouldn’t let me talk. He kept asking questions, and, here’s the worst of it … wanting answers!


His name’s Bret. But, don’t get upset. It’ll be okay. I’m sorry it went bad for you. But, we had to do it, because of Fox’s ratings.


I’ll do another interview. Get me on Larry King or with Chris Matthews. Someone.


Sir, the rating aren’t good for CNN, MSNBC, or, quite honestly, any news channel other than Fox.


Al-Jazeera?


No, we need to shore up your base.


That’s why I suggested al-Jazeera.


I’m afraid that won’t do. But don’t worry, sir, I’ll find an interview show that’s not on Fox, that will have better ratings than CNN or MSNBC.


Great! Who do you have in mind?


Greetings, citizens!

The Smart, Funny Couple

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SarahK and I each won a RiffTrax caption contest (they picked three winners and we were two of them) to win free RiffTrax, so I thought in exchange I should plug them again. Everyone should buy and enjoy RiffTrax. The humor may not be for everyone, though; I hear that pedophiles don’t like them.

New Moon comes out Friday at midnight (guess whose wife will be in line for a copy?) and the RiffTrax for it will be available on Friday. SarahK says it won’t save me because she’s going to make me watch it normal first. Man, I hope our child doesn’t grow up thinking its normal for vampires to sparkle.

IMAO Baby Names

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A lot of people seem to think we should have a baby naming contest for the upcoming IMAO baby. I think that’s a great idea, but I don’t know if SarahK will consider it binding. Anyway, I’ll at least share with you some of the names I’ve been thinking of:

Rocket Punch Fleming
Dark Vengeance Fleming
Dragon Fleming
Ghost Dog Fleming
Flammable Fleming
Ultimate Fleming
Gene Parmesan Fleming
He Who Shall Not Be Named Fleming

And here are some more names I was thinking of. Sometimes, I’m not sure if they’re boys’ or girls’ names:

Coffee
Magnum
Thor
Awesome
Metallica
Apocalypse
Schnappi
Olaf (no one would mess with a kid named Olaf)

And there were some good suggestions on Twitter:

Mr. T Fleming
El Guapo Fleming
Agent Fleming (that was from Lair)

So that’s to get things started. If you having any other good name I ideas, throw them out and maybe later we can have a vote on the best. I think my favorite so far is “Dark Vengeance Fleming”. I think “Vengeance” sounds like it should be a girl’s name.

UPDATE:

Someone on Twitter mentioned she knew someone who named his sons Drake, Ronin, and Legend.

Ronin. Hmm…

Not Even a Trillion Dollars!

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If you’re following the health care debate, the CBO (I don’t know who they are) estimate that Obama’s bill will cost $940 billion over the next ten years which somehow saves us money ($100 billion over ten years, though Obama can easily fritter that away in a month). I don’t get government math. I had my own plan which involved shutting down all the government and exiling all of its employees to Antarctica, but the CBO told me that would actually increase the cost of government. The CBO also told me that if I gave them ten dollars, it would be like I was saving twenty. I didn’t understand that, and when I gave then ten dollars they just ran off giggling.

UPDATE:

Ed Morrisey and Allahpundit has a good explanation of how the numbers were fudged in this post. To make the 10 year estimate trillions less, they just wait four years to actually implement anything (only $17 billion of the estimated $940 billion is spent the first four years). So the cost is really $927 billion over six years, with those last four missing years being the greatest cost.

Random Thoughts

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I’m half Irish. The baby will be a quarter Irish. Eventually we’ll get drunken potato eating completely out of our gene pool.

I wish we got video of our little baby jumping around; I want to watch that again. Instead, all I have is 24 on the DVR.

Oh boy, I hope our pregnancy doesn’t have a stupid hillbilly subplot like 24! If it does, it will probably be from my wife’s side.

On St. Patrick’s Day: I’m going to drink until I puke tonight. We only have Walmart brand soda at home, but I think that’ll work. I hope Bible Study doesn’t mind.

Man, I can’t wait to finally have an excuse to watch Spongebob Squarepants. That show looks fun!

My governor’s name is Butch.

Obama to American people: “Shut up! I won, not you!”

Preserve, protect, and ignore

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During his interview with Fox News’ Bret Baier, the president said “I don’t spend a lot of time worrying about what the procedural rules are in the House or the Senate.”

The president isn’t concerned about other branches of government following the Constitution?

It’s not like he’s sworn an oath to preserve, protect, or defend the Constitution or anything.


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Maybe Obama thought the oath was to “preserve, protect, and ignore” the Constitution. That would explain a lot.

Why Obama doesn’t want the U.S. flag flying in Haiti

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So the president doesn’t want U.S. troops flying the U.S. flag in Haiti during relief efforts.

Why? According to a report:

The Obama administration says flying the flag could give Haiti the wrong idea.

“We are not here as an occupation force, but as an international partner committed to supporting the government of Haiti on the road to recovery,” the U.S. government’s Haiti Joint Information Center said in response to a query about the flag.

But, there’s more to it than that. This video explains why:


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Remember when we had a president who was proud of our country and respected the flag? Those were the days.

Related: Hope n’ Change Cartoons