A poll shows that U.S. residents are losing faith in the American Dream. That’s horrible. The American Dream is what motivates us to do better and keep our country awesome.
Now, people tend to have different ideas of what the American Dream is, but there are usually a lot of similar themes. Here’s what the American Dream is to me:
I live in a giant house made of plastic and titanium and own a hovercraft. Patrolling the streets are tyrannosaurus rexes who are genetically engineered to be courteous and eat criminals. Hippies have long been extinct, and it’s illegal to talk about them. I have a basement full of guns and robot parts. We have world peace since we’ve destroyed or conquered all other countries. We’ve made contact with our first alien species and become friends with them: The Thundercats. There is no more shouting about politics on TV because all disputes are settled with a kung fu fight at dawn. Racism is a thing of the past, since we’ve all been dyed purple (except for me since I already wasn’t racist). After a long day at work patrolling space for rogue asteroids, I can relax with my wife and cyborg children and watch ape boxing. And there is true freedom for all… except when people do something I don’t like, since I’m emperor.
So what’s the American Dream to you?
Free Markets, no liberals and socialism or even mentioning Karl Marx or That One is punishable by death via stoning…
We break out the Nukes and nuke a few countries that we don’t take a shine to! We then re-nuke and super re-nuke countries like Canada just for the show!
I dream of a world without AMERICAN IDOL.
As a very young’un, my idea of the “American Dream” was a successful adult life as a productive, money making member of society, perhaps after some amount of time spent in the United States military, followed by a nice, peaceful retirement gardening, reading, and watching bluebird hatchlings in my backyard.
I believe there are many who want something similar. Now tell me, how many of you think you can build a better life for yourself in the private sector today and most importantly, in the following years? How many young men and women will want to serve with those proud to call themselves airmen, sailors, soldiers, and marines when they look forward to the prospect of saluting a commander who looks down upon them and looks forward himself to weakening the military to fund an entitlement state built simply for the expansion of his own power and the power of his friends? And how many retirees will live a financially secure twilight?
If I was to write an internet column, I believe this where I would write
This isn’t an American dream; it’s an American nightmare.
The american dream? Tom T Hall had it right years ago,
“it’s faster horses, younger women, older whiskey, and more money.”
I have lowered my standards quite a bit since childhood…. at this point I dream of a world where politicians dont try to re-label illegal aliens as “undocumented workers.” I dream of a world where politicians dont even thinking of voting on legislation that hasnt been completed / written. I dream of a world where my right to carry firearms (concealed or otherwise) isnt questioned in any shape or form. I dream of a world where the reasonable man principle prevails over all others.
I am calling the congressman on DickMorris.com list of wavering healthcare dem votes in the house. The list consists of 30 democrats. What I am saying is the following:
* I am registered republican and currently not a vote for or against them as I do not vote in their primary and most likely they are in a district in which they do not have significant probability of electing republicans and thus:
* If they vote for this health care bill I will register democrat solely so I can vote against them in the primary
* I will to donate money to their primary opponents
* In the general election I will of course vote republican but hopefully the republican will not be running against them. They will be running against their primary opponent!
I dream of walking onto the campus of a public university and not seeing a Che tee-shirt anywhere, not because they’ve been outlawed, but because the students know how to think.
My American dream is to become Todd Palin.
My American dream is to grow up, be successful, raise a family, and enjoy my life without interference from the government. Apparently, that’s too *^@#ing much to ask.
My American dream is to own a home with a white picket fence and a moat,
Have a job that involves punching hippies, and shooting guns,
Have a few simple luxuries, a nice car, a colored TV, a 37mm AA gun, a barb-e-q grill, and a hammock.
My American Dream is to have a place in the country with enough land for my four wheelers, shooting range, garden and orchard. Of course it’d be by a pond and a stream with plenty of woods so my kids could explore and build tree houses. I’d also have a ‘Forget the dang dog, beware of owner’ sign, and a ‘Trespassers will be shot on sight’ sign. I’d still only be a mile from work, which is super close, but still far enough to get away. Every where I drive, there’d be no traffic, and wherever I go, there’d be no lines. My sports team would always win their respective championships. There wouldn’t be laws to protect people from themselves so the morons would die out. Liberals would be treated like the mental midgets they are as we conservatives would always talk down to them: “Oh, you made a poo-poo? How nice.” I wouldn’t have to care about useless crap like politics because the government would be tiny and wouldn’t be infringing on my american dream.
That’s a start, anyway.
hey Marvin, your need for a colored TV indicates racism! if you ask me.
and somebody please stop Frank before it’s too late. I want the freedom to speak of the hippies of the past.
My dream would be to to freely walk the streets without being gunned down by the Japanese Yakuza. Seriously, those guys DO NOT like getting screwed on drug deals.
In my American Dream, every person is a Sovereign.l
Oh yeah, and there’d be no Twitter or Facebook status either. Who gives a flying crap if you’re planning on making sloppy joes for dinner tonight?
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!
Ernie Loco pretty much nailed the American Dream.
Unfortunately, we’re currently all being subjected to the Kenyan Dream. Which, apparently, is as follows: Find anti-American American radicals to pay for your college. With the help of those same anti-American radicals, make opponents drop out of political races by using the American legal system against them and become a state politician by default. With the help of those same anti-American radicals and many useful idiots in the so-called media, create a false persona as a type of new “Messiah” and become president of the United States. Destroy the United States.
MarkoMancuso and Ernie Loco both came pretty close to describing my idea of the American Dream. Right now I’d settle for a federal government that wasn’t “out to get me.”
My American dream parallels that of Frank J, except for the NFL season would last from, oh, let’s say March to February. And a wall in my dream home is lined with the heads of hippies I personally took out. And forget that not mentioning the hippies part. How can I stand beaming with pride in front on my wall full of hippie heads and brag about how I took this hippie down with one shot at 500 yards or the one I took out with a bar of soap if I can’t mention the smelly bums? Half the fun of taking out hippies is the boasting after you’ve made the world a less smelly place.
Also, I’d be best friends with President Fred Thompson and we’d sit in front of the TV drinking beers, trading hippie punching stories as we wait for the NFL season to kick off. Yay! Go Dolphins!
I thought the dinosaurs were supposed to shoot lasers? Did you give up on that idea?
In all seriousness, my dream is for my children to grow up in a country of peace and liberty, and that they never have to live through or fight in a war, and that they live long, happy, healthy lives. And plus that I win the lottery.
My American dream is rather simple. I want the right to put as much salt as I want to on my Big Mac without any interference by any government agency of any sort, local or federal. Oh yeah…and no interference with my right to bear arms.
First of all, Frank, CONGRATS on your baby!
Best wishes on October, or whenever it may be!
Be that as it may: MY IDEA OF THE AMERICAN DREAM: peace and quiet.
It’s the obverse of the usual “leave me the hell alone!” notion.
Well, NO, it’s EXACTLY THE SAME…just said a heap more politely.
May your babe suffer the same gifted insight into the human funny bone as you…SHAME ON YOU…tsk…tsk…tsk…HA!
“Let us contemplate our forefathers, and posterity, and resolve to maintain the rights bequeathed to us from the former, for the sake of the latter. The necessity of the times, more than ever, calls for our utmost circumspection, deliberation, fortitude and perseverance. Let us remember that ‘If we suffer tamely a lawless attack upon our liberty, we encourage it, and involve others in our doom.’ It is a very serious consideration…that millions yet unborn may be the miserable sharers of the event.”
-Samuel Adams, Speech, 1771.
“Driven from every other corner of the earth, freedom of thought and the right of private judgment in matters of conscience direct their course to this happy country as their last asylum.”
-Samuel Adams, Speech, Philadelphia, Aug. 1, 1776
“What a glorious morning for America!”
-Samuel Adams, (upon hearing the gunfire at Lexington, Ma. April 19, 1775.)
“I need another beer.”
-Me, tonight, right now.
I’ve been thinking about the Che T-shirt wearing hippies. In my dream world, the T-shirts would not simply disappear. In my world, each of the wearers would come to understand the true horror of watching Che personally execute a family member. This dose of reality would be brought to the T-shirt wearer without actually harming anyone.
Che’s preference for execution was a .45 ACP round to the head. He hated capitalism but was fond of his M1911 Colt.
i don’t dream it, dude. I live it. Even in the city. The American Dream isn’t location-dependent. You get what you accept. Verb sap.
What’s the American Dream to me?
Two chicks at the same time, man.