Obama may not give Khalid Sheikh Mohammed a trial at all. Everyone is against his really dumb idea to try him in New York, and he doesn’t want to go back on what he said and give KSM a military trial. So no trial and just continued indefinite detention for KSM.
Now, I’m not going to care one wit about KSM’s civil rights (my least kind of rights), but we do have to follow the Constitution here. If we are unable to give a detainee a trial, then the procedures for that are quite clear. KSM needs to be put in a room with two doors. He will be told that one door leads to his freedom and that the other door contains a hungry tiger that’s also coked out of its mind. KSM is then instructed to choose one door. After he agonizes over the decision for a while, he’ll try to open one door but will be unable because they’re both locked. And when he’s struggling with the doorknob, we drop a bowling ball on his head.
Hey, it’s in the Constitution. Near the middle.
That guy isn’t dead yet? *sigh*
How about the old tried and true bullet in the back of the head. Then give his body to science so they can find out why he has all that disgusting body hair on his back and sholders.
Clearly they have reached a decision, he will be put to death by old age.
Although the bowling ball works too.
Why do coked up tigers and bowling balls get to have all the fun? I say behind door one is a coked up tiger and behind door number two are the 3000 victims families. The room is also slowly filling with bacon. I know that sounds like a treat to most of us but I think it means no virgins for this guy.
Barry was trying to Bam-boozle!
I really like your idea, Frank. But I’d go straight to the dropping bowling balls on his head part. Notice my use of the plural as in bowling balls. I’d say about a thousand should do. Then you can balance the budget by auctining off the bowling balls. Here’s a chance to own an actual bowling ball dropped on Khalid Shakej Yer Booty’s head or whatever that hairy, smelly terrorist’s name is!
I’m chock full of great ideas like that. I ought to run for President in 2012! My moto would be “Vote for me and terrorists will have bowling balls on their heads.”
Everyone being against one of his really dumb ideas didn’t stand in the way of his other dumb ideas. Why would this one be different?
Frank good diea, you left out the other doors. Behind one is Sarah Palin in black leotards with a crossbow (rowr). Behind the next door is Fred Thompson in a bad mood with ATOMIC PUNCH !!!!!!!!! An extra door has Nancy Pelosi and Jent Reno “in the mood”. brrrrr. All of this covered under the Commece Clause.
Death by Rube Goldberg invention. That’d be sweet.
Unplugging the Constitution by Florin Ternal
Page 193 Term limits and the curvature of democratic space
Einstein’s theory of general relativity
This is the only place I found Bowling balls and the Constitution to be joined in any way. It does involve rubber sheets so I assume that it also involves terrorists and water boarding. People, Beds, rubber sheets and bowling balls are all included so I suppose that your theory is also good. I did not read too much as it is boring and I do not want to ruin my engineering status by too much knowledge. But then Libs don’t read at all, you can use this as a source document to prove your point.
Storm…that’s like just so wrong at so many levels that my head is about to explode plus I just threw up a little in my mouth and I think I’m going to have the runs. Thanks!
Yes, yes, we know that Obama would never go back on his word…yes, that’s sarcasm.
I meant the Nancy Pelosi and Janet Reno part, of course…ewwwwww!
How about we strap him to the nose of the next shuttle (external fuel tank) and give him two rides (entry/re-entry). I’d pay $100 pay for view to watch that one on the camera strapped to him!
I say you just have both doors lead to the tiger.
Or maybe wild boars. If you’re a muslim and you get killed by a pig, is that like really bad or something? Maybe instead of getting 72 virgins, you get to be one of the 72 virgins for somebody else.
Or, just set him free anywhere in the country, but publicize all the details a month in advance, and promise no prosecution for anything that happens to him. He wouldn’t last 30 seconds unless the really creative people get there first, and in that case, he’ll wish he hadn’t lasted that long.
This “living, breathing” Constitution thing may have merit after all…
Let’s Make a Deal!
“Door #1, Door #2, or, Door #3….”
“Door number One… Three… Two… No wait! Three! No. One… No! Wait!!”
“Oh, Monty.”
“Sorry, time’s up a$$hole. Fire!”
Ernie Loco, I like your idea. But there’s a problem here. What if they pick San Francisco, Chicago, Boston or some other bastion of libtardom? They’ll probably elect him mayor or something. Better to just drop the bowling ballson his head. Or better yet, take a waterboiard with a big nail through it and whack him upside the head repeatedly with it!
Two words: mexi cannon. Wait!! 3! 3 words ah ah ah! mexi moon cannon! Wait! 4 words, I come in again!
Death by 1,000 Cuts.
Tickets to make cuts get actioned on eBay to the highest bidders.
You know that place where they kept Hannibal the Cannibal. You know where they took Clarice and Hannibal invented a whole new pronunciation for the word Chianti. Those are the doors he should get to pick between and I’m ok with the doors still being clear. Then the administration could stand behind being transparent for the first time in their administration. I’m pretty sure that place isn’t on Guantanamo so it’s kinda like a three-fer. No Guantanamo, no military trials and transparency. You’re welcome BO I just got ya a KSM bounce. You’re numbers would be in the higher than they are now zone.
He definitely needs to be fed to wild pigs (one small piece at a time – 2,976 pieces, to be exact). I’m pretty sure someone who has been metabolized into pig doots doesn’t get the virgins.
I say we load him on a jumbe jet, lock all the doors, seal the cockpit and set the autopilot for downtown Mecca, at high noon. Send him to meet Allah with a bang.
In the commerce clause behind the separation of church and state and right before gay marriage.
Too bad liberals dont look for oil as hard as they look for pretend rights in the constitution wed all be paying 1$ a gallon. Russia, Iran, Venezuela would all be too poor to matter to anyone.
ops “your” numbers
Brought to you by not an English teacher or proof reader.
DamnCat don’t you mean death by 1,000 cats?
A firing squad, hanging, or lethal injection all sound perfectly fine to me. A traitor is a traitor is a traitor and the only good one is a dead one. Since he’s an enemy combatant he gets a military tribunal and then he gets…………….his sentance.
After all one should NEVER leave an live enemy behind them. Always leave a dead one. Just common sense.
If all the stuff liberals say is in the Constitution I’m sure that’s in there too
I’m with the Cat of Damnation (death of a bazillion cuts). Death has two parameters: Pain and Duration. In this case, I support both.
# bitterclinger says:
November 15th, 2010 at 5:58 pm
I say we load him on a jumbe jet, lock all the doors, seal the cockpit and set the autopilot for downtown Mecca, at high noon. Send him to meet Allah with a bang.
Wast of a good jumbo jet. Pack the thing with pigs, pork, bacon, tripe, lard, ham and anything else I missed. He should also be wearing a bacon suit after being well greased.
However they decide to kill him, first he should be given a blood transfusion to replace every drop of blood inside his body with pigs blood.Now that I think about it, that might kill him, do it.
I recommend the old ‘Put him in an old fashioned deep sea diving suit with the bronze helmet and a faulty pressure regulator, drop him to about 300 ft under the sea and cut off his air supply’ trick, as recently demonstrated on Mythbusters.
(For those who missed that episode, he’d gets smushed into the helmet like red toothpaste mixed with hair and gristle, due to the sudden change in air pressure within his suit. It’s Science!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEY3fN4N3D8&feature=related Caution! (Gory)
Replace his heart, or fill the large hole in his chest where his heart should be, with a pig heart! Sow er’ in there good and zap her! She will start beating for awhile if done right. Then let him know what you have done!
The 16 pound balls mentioned in the Consitution are not bowling balls. They are cannon balls.
How can you be coked up and hungry at the same time? Just saying. It’s not like I’ve ever tried cocaine and would know.
Good gosh, 4 0f 7 (#31) is onto something. I say we make him watch the Mythbusters video over and over and over again before we send him down to the deep. Then, we keep him waiting there a while. When all is done, we’ll have a video to watch over and over again.
#35 – Burmashave,
Great minds think alike!
If managed right, we could do a whole season of a new show; Mythbusters – EXTREME.
Tell KSM we’re putting him in a Work-Release program and then substitute him for Buster, the Mythbusters popular but long suffering crash test dummy.
There are lots of scenarios I’d like to see him and his fellow detainees run through in the name of Science!.